synthneon | oceanview (different path) || ❝ lost in mist for days and days, now you see the sunny seas. ❞

oceanview (different path) || ❝ lost in mist for days and days, now you see the sunny seas. ❞

OCEANVIEW :: INTO THE DARK

i must guide my love through the night

Follow the deer to follow the owl
I'm fighting to save my love somehow
I cannot feel her by my side
Even in this place inside my mind CODE BY TESSISAMESS

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Back to the beginning.

We all come to a story with hopes and expectations, looking for an answer. Sometimes it would be better to live with that hope-without ever knowing the full story.

In a horror story, there are only victims and monsters, and the trick is not to end up as either. But, trapped by the genre, we are all ripped to pieces along the way.

This is not the story I hoped it to be. This is not the ending I wanted. This story will eat us alive. This story is a monster.

And monsters wear many faces.

[ « This is it. I mean, this is REALLY it. »

The Director of the Federal Bureau of Control walks down the hallway. Feet lightly step on the wooden floor beneath her while the wooden walls continue at her sides. At her side is the Ranger Captain who has been considered her right hand ranger since 2019. He simply won't take the job that would see him as apart of her management team.

« He's really here. Home. »

They had managed to intervene as local paranatural criminal gangs classified as the Cult of the Trees had swooped into Bright Falls. The intention was presumably to kill not only FBI Agents Alex Casey and Saga Anderson, but also parautalitarian Alan Wake. Famous author who went missing in Cauldron Lake thirteen years ago.

Now, they have at least the writer secured. Alex Casey is missing and Saga Anderson has gone rogue. ]

"We're working on it," [ the Ranger Captain assures her. ] "It won't be hard to find either of them if we have Wake secured. It all centers around him after all."

It always did. [ the Director replies gently before pushing open a set of wooden and glass double doors.

Agent Kiran Estevez looks up as the two enter. A brief discussion is had about "what a shitshow" trying to interview the writer had become. How he was uncooperative and also seemed to fly off the handle ta the mention of certain things. How he kept demanding to speak to the Director, because he needed to talk to her. Estevez wanted to handle the situation on her own, but the Director insists that she and the Ranger Captain are there as back up to support her calls. She'll only supersede if needed. ]

Tell me where to go and I'll get it done for you, Kiran.

[ Estevez hands her the gray clipboard holder that contains the interview transcript with Alan Wake. Green eyes scan over the printed word and a frown deepens on her face.

« It sounds like him, don't you think? Though, he certainly flew off the rails faster than I remember him doing normally. »

Her guide shifts around her. ]

No mention of feeling another presence?

"If you mean the being that the HRA's pick up on that you brought? No. I called it at the end of the transcript."

[ « Did... he not notice you? He always noticed you somehow. You helped guide him out of the Lake the first time. You brought him to me. Now he can't--or WON'T--notice you? » ]

Well, I guess we'll need to figure out what he can and can't do. [ the Director talks cautiously. Everyone knows she was involved thirteen years ago. Everyone knows that she had something to do with Alan Wake. She just doesn't want to bring it up. ] He wanted to speak to the Director, right? Let's see if he remembers me.

"I'm not sure about this, Faden."

He contacted me over the Hotline, Kiran. We NEED to know what he knows now. It's not the same as it was thirteen years ago when I was here. Well, a lot of Bright Falls is. This isn't.

[ Estevez glances at the Ranger Captain who sighs and shakes his head. A hand raises and the field agent moves out of the way for the Director to make her way forward.

Another set of wooden double doors, but this time they're not outcropped in glass. They're lined with black rock. The best element to keep paranatural forces in---and also to keep them out.

Her hand trembles as fingers gently rest on the handle.

She's not the same girl she was when he met her. She isn't afraid of her own shadow or of something lurking beyond her field of vision. Confident. Self-assured. Powerful. In Control. She's not the same. That still doesn't stop the nervous butterflies in her stomach as she opens the door and steps inside the comfortable looking room. It doesn't stop her from feeling excitement, her heart pounding, or feelings she has kept to herself for so long from wanting to burst out of her chest.

Green eyes land on the man in the room. Black and white flannel. Jeans. He's looking out the window over the forests outside of Bright Falls and Watery. His hair is so long, but she can tell it's him. That it really is Alan Wake.

Jesse Faden inhales sharply and clenches the fist not holding the gray clipboard.

« It's him. »

She's not the same girl from thirteen years ago. Even then, she feels that sudden urge to run up to the writer and throw her arms around him. Those emotions threaten to burst out once again but she keeps them contained inside. She's had practice over the last decade of doing that.

« It's Alan. »

The keychain she keeps in her pocket suddenly feels heavy.

She swallows the lump of emotions in her throat and forces her voice to be steady. ]

Alan Wake?

[ The Director walks down the hallway. She's not the only one walking. Alan's walking too, walking in circles around the room they stuck him in. He's restless, antsy, agitated. He doesn't want to be in this room, but they're not letting him leave this room. He can't do what he needs to do if he's here.

... But what does he need to do? ]

I need- I need to talk to the Director. The Director can help. I don't know how, but I think- I just need to talk to her.

[ He keeps walking, sometimes in circles, sometimes in a straight line then doubling back, but he keeps mumbling to himself: ]

I need to talk to the Director.

[ Eventually, Alan runs out of places to walk... or maybe it's that he runs out of steam. Everything's been a whirlwind since he came back: since he appeared on the shore of Cauldron Lake. How did he end up here? How did he end up being questioned by Kiran Estevez?

Can he trust her? Can he trust the FBC and the Director? I have to be able to trust the Director... don't I?

Alan's steps halt and he moves over to the window and just stands there staring out at what he can see of the forest outside. The trees are moving lightly, as there's a slight breeze, but it's not violent or harsh and it's not dark outside, not yet. Sometimes the scene before his eyes changes; the trees appear splintered, broken in half, as if some unseen force damaged them beyond repair.

He blinks and the scene clears and the trees appear normal again. God, I'm really losing it.

At first, he doesn't even register the sound of the door opening or footsteps moving into the room. It's probably just Estevez coming back for round two. But unlike when Estevez entered the room for the first time, Alan feels something. Maybe he hears something too, but he definitely feels a tingling sensation on the back of his neck and at the base of his spine. What is that?

Then a voice breaks the silence, and he knows it's not Estevez. But who is it? He doesn't turn from the window right away. ]

... Who wants to know? Is it your turn to try and get answers, since she couldn't do it before?

[ « Does he recongize me? You? You're reaching out to him, aren't you? »

Her guide shifts again.

Jesse moves her weight from one foot to the other.

« Come on. Come on. Turn and look at me. It's me, Alan. Jesse. YOU reached out to me. Every single time you have, I've answered. Turn around. Should I try another way? »

Jesse swallows again. That urge to run up and throw her arms around him strikes again. She's not the young woman anymore. She's the Director. People need her to be in charge of her emotions. Clear headed.

« But, it's Alan. He's home. Finally... »

Polaris reaches out to the Writer. A gentle and familiar sound. ]

Hi, Alan.

[ Alan keeps looking out the window, but he's not really seeing the trees anymore. He's trying desperately to make sense of this. To make sense of being back, being home, but feeling like something's missing. It's not like how he felt when he was missing that week thirteen years ago. It feels... worse.

He still doesn't turn around, because... well, he's scared. Scared that he's not himself anymore; scared that this feeling of something missing is going to be permanent. He'll never get back whatever it is that he's missing. I want it back. I want it back and I don't even know what it is. Why don't I know what it is?

He feels his thoughts start to slip away from him, spiraling off into something bordering on crazy. He starts to feel himself going crazy. That's what happened when Estevez tried to question him, isn't it? His hands curl into fists as that feeling of agitation washes over him again, until...

What?

Something brushes against him. It's almost like a hand on the back of his neck, but nothing's there. A sound's there. Can a sound be like a touch?

He still doesn't turn around, but he turns his head to look at the person in the room with him. ]

You know who I am? I mean- yeah, of course you do, a lot of people know who I am, but I thought... I thought people would be glad to forget about me.

[ Jesse watches him closely. People watching has become less a skill and more as second hand nature. Reading someone became a survival skill--if she could trust them or not. Alan Wake had become the one person, before becoming Director, that she had trusted with every aspect of what happened in Ordinary. About Polaris.

« Now, he won't even turn around and look at me. »

Her gaze darts to the side as an uncomfortable feeling starts to rise in her chest. A feeling she knows. She just doesn't want it to be true when it comes to Alan.

« I know you're trying. Thank you. » ]

Your books went from best-selling cult classics to blockbuster Hollywood movies. I'm pretty sure that qualifies as "being missed."

[ « What happens if he does turn around and look at me? He's taking so long. Why? »

That feeling continues to rumble in her chest.

« Polaris? »

The resonance once again reaches out to Alan. Like two hands gently resting on the back of his shoulders. A familiar touch that must surely feel as if it comes from days long gone. One that belongs to not only the shifting bell like sound, but a person he has been trying to find for quite some time. ]

Edited 2024-08-29 22:15 (UTC)

[ He can almost feel Jesse's eyes on him even if he's not looking to see what she's doing or if she's looking at him. Somehow, all of this feels wrong, like he's wrong and not reacting the way he's supposed to. He can't put a finger on why he feels wrong, but all of his instincts are telling him that his reactions aren't right. This wasn't supposed to be like this.

Then she reveals how his books have been adapted, and he freezes in place. ]

Wait, they've- What? Whose idea was that? No, I know who it was, it had to have been Barry.

[ He wonders to himself if he'd ever have the guts to watch the movies made from the books he wrote.

But then he feels something... something strange and yet comforting even if his mind is still struggling to reconcile the conflicting feelings and sensations and what seems like fragmented memories that used to be whole.

It feels like someone's hands are resting on him, and part of him wants to lean into that touch. Why do I know this? ]

We've met somewhere before. Haven't we?

[ She gives a shake of her head even if he really can't see it. It would have to have been Barry Wheeler and Alice Wake. The divorce had never fully gone through with Alan's disappearance, which meant the rights and franchise all fell to presumably those two parties. Jesse was never involved. Why would she be? She only knew Barry a handful of days and none it would have been enough time for her to be included in anything with legalities.

« Not that I would have wanted it. I just wanted him home. He's home now, but...

It wasn't supposed to be this way. »

Not that there was a predetermined way for it to be. Just what she had imagined and hoped for in her own head.

His question tells her everything she needs to know. Confirms everything she was already suspecting.

That emotion rumbles in her chest. Green eyes tilt down to the floor between them and she stills. It reminds her of the time she thought Alan was coming home only to find out he was trapped in another story. Another story that, by the end, the villain was vanquished and the sunrise featured Alan and Alice Wake... and she was left behind.

Again.

Now...

« He forgot. »

She wrote him a note so he wouldn't forget. It was on his own instructions she did. Which means he forgot about the note as well. All that must have stuck was somehow him learning that "Jesse Faden" had become the Director. That her "guiding star" was still there too. He wrote a story where she vanquished the evil from the Lake and... she was left behind.

Again.

« At least whatever was left of Dylan remembered me. Remembered us. He knew I was Jesse and his sister. He knew and could see you. »

A frown tugs on the corner of her lips. She forces the walls to stay in place.

« No. I'm the Director now. People need me. They need someone to call the shots; to be the leader. This can't intefer with that. »

Her free hand curls.

« Thirteen years... and he forgot. »

Everything gets pushed down. Hidden behind walls she let him through once. She can't pull Polaris back, especially as her friend quite literally hums through the whole building. That doesn't mean she needs Polaris to reach out again. She has the answer she needed.

« He wanted the Director. So, he can talk to the Director. Not that I'm going to introduce myself that way. » ]

Estevez was trying to get you to co-operate with us. The Buearu has been holding down the area since you disappeared in 2010. We have reports from our own investigation thirteen years ago, but, they missed details. Details she was hoping you'd be willing to give to help us stop what we call "the Shadow", and what you call "the Dark Presence."

[ She pauses. ] We also have the reports the Director wrote up as she was involved with everything thirteen years ago. Hell, the locals still have pictures if when the two of you were here together.

[ « Part of me really hates this. It's not supposed to be this way. Did I really wait ALL this time for this...? »

Her free hand moves into the pocket that has her half of thr charm she gave him all those years ago. ]

The Director was also able to clear up some details about Dr. Emil Hartman... after she had to take him down at HQ. Her report said you contacted her about him.

We just wanted answers and to clear things up so we can help each other. You flew off the handle at her, Wake.

Edited 2024-08-30 03:06 (UTC)

[ He waits for an answer that he's not sure is ever coming. Why does it matter, anyway? Those books were from his old life. The movies have nothing to do with him, not really. Still, in a way, it's a connection to that life, even if he no longer feels like the man who dove into the Lake thirteen years ago.

All I wanted was to go home. Am I home now? Is this real? Can the Director help?

He feels himself hunching over, hands moving as if they want to grasp both sides of his head. No, I can't go to pieces now. I need the Director to help me. I need- I need what I'm missing to- What?

His movements are slow as he finally turns completely away from the window; he's straightened up again, and he's not clutching his head. There's a wary look in his eyes and in his posture, as if he's not sure he can trust her. Can he trust anyone around here? In his mind, even the walls of this room look threatening. Untrustworthy. Don't ask how a wall can look like anything but a wall.

That might as well have been a prison... those four walls. ]

Estevez. [ Alan's expression shifts to something not exactly unreadable, but there's something hesitant in it. Still wary and untrusting. ] I know what she wanted, but she wasn't doing a very good job getting me to do it. [ He huffs out a dry laugh. ]

Even the best negotiator probably would have a hard time. Are you the best negotiator? I- Wait.

[ Belatedly, her words click in Alan's mind, except they don't make sense. ]

I wasn't here with the Director. I was with... someone. Not the Director. You can't take those memories. They're ours.

[ Suddenly there's a hint of force behind Alan's words; it's not anger or hate, just an inexplicable force that even Alan doesn't understand. He's not even sure who the force is directed at. It's not directed at the woman in the room with him. ]

Those reports can't be real. Maybe the story changed and tried to make them real. Tried to make you all believe.

Hartman. He became something else. Turned into something else. The Third Thing. He's been taken care of?

[ Belatedly, Alan realizes his hands have clenched into fists, and he forces himself to relax them a little. ]

Sorry, I- [ He points at his head. ] It's kind of crazy up there. Not that I expect you to know that. What can I clear up for you? I could fly off the handle again, not that I want to do that. But what did you want to know?

[ Should I even tell her anything? ]

[ Her breath catches in her throat as he finally turns around. The beard and longer hair are new, but it's definitely him. It really is Alan Wake. He's older, but, the eyes are the same. Those gray eyes that can become light or dark depending on his mood.

« Something tells me it wasn't that Estevez wasn't doing it right. »

Her gaze drifts down once more as it's obvious that Alan doesn't recongize her. Nothing in his face or his gaze has the spark of realization. Especially as he continues by saying the Director wasn't who he had been with. His voice snaps and she visibly startles at sudden jump in tone.

That feeling in her chest increases. Her shoulders drop.

« He really doesn't recongize us. » ]

Jesse Faden is the Director. She was here in 2010. Not only that, but she was with you. We thought that's how you could contact her about Hartman. Because of that bond.

[ « I guess not. » ]

She took care of him four years ago.

[ Her gaze drifts to the side before looking back at him. ]

We know the event closed when you disappeared into the Lake. You somehow contacted the Director four years ago. We found a manuscript underneath a door in a place called the Oceanview Motel. What happened after you went into the Lake?

[ Alan's expression morphs into one of sheer confusion. It doesn't help that his memories are scattered, but the words he's hearing make no sense at all. ]

Why are you saying that? To get me to trust you or something? I know I wasn't with the Director back then. I- I'm trying to find someone. Yeah. I'm trying to find the Director, but-

[ This time, he scrubs his face with his hands as the confusion in his mind only grows. ]

I don't understand, I- Why doesn't this make sense? Why don't I remember things? I remember Hartman, and I remember... I was desperate. Scared. Trying to reach out to someone, anyone who could hear me.

... When did Jesse Faden become the Director?

[ He rubs his eyes more as if that will help dislodge the memories he can't seem to grab hold of. ]

What happened after I went into the Lake? I think... I think I figured out how the story had to end. All stories have an enemy, don't they? The enemy needed to be stopped. But I didn't know then that the enemy was much bigger than I thought it was. Barbara Jagger, or what was left of her, wasn't the real enemy.

That wasn't the end, even though a part of me wished it was. [ He's not sure if that even answered her question, so he just offers her a half-apologetic look that probably doesn't clear anything up at all. ]

She became the Director in 2019. Nine years after you went missing. [ Her tone softens despite the authority in it. Saying the dates outloud just make her heartache more. Over a decade... ] She was nineteen when things happened in Bright Falls.

I don't say things to get people to trust me, Wake.

[ « If you remembered me, you'd know that. » ]

So, you stopped the Dark Presence in the form of Barbara Jagger. The Lake closed behind you. You were trapped in another dimension for thirteen years, but managed to get messages out.

Now what? Another story? More manuscript pages to hunt down? Agent Anderson and Casey found some by the Lake. You had some on you as well. [ She frowns slightly. ] What exactly is going in between the Dark Presence and you this time?

[ Her hand curls around the charm.

« Telling him that I'm her--the Director, Jesse, won't even matter. It's just the feeling I have. He doesn't recongize me and can't even see the two points as yhe same person. There's no point. » ]

The Bright Falls team has found manuscripts over the years that have come up from the Lake. The Sheriff even had them on record. What is going on, Wake?

Edited 2024-08-30 20:18 (UTC)

OCEANVIEW :: INTO THE DARK

📜— forward, by alan wake.

📜— the first spiral.

—the fbc bright falls site.

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🌀— initiation ii.

📜— the second spiral.

—the fbc bright falls sight.

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