bloody tears || ❝ our fate so darkly romantic, i will never leave your side. ❞

[shepherdtostars]

bloody tears

AU PLOTLINE

The land is wrought with terror
He roams the countryside...
A journey far from doner
Racing the setting sun this battle must be won CODE BY TESSISAMESS

Comments

🕯️ — temple knight and the witch.

[shepherdtostars]

[shepherdtostars]

[ The cave that belonged to the mysterious witch Matoya.

Estinien Wyrmblood cursed under his breath as he continued to pull the man whose body leaned against his. He had never wished to see this cave again. The one deal he had sealed to her had been far enough in his mind...until his fellow Temple Knight's life hung in the balance. While not brother by blood, Aymeric de Borel had become a brother in spirit and name. The once archer had saved his life and instilled a deep trust between them, even to the point where Estinien had not been the sort to abandon his brother to a dark fate merely a few years prior.

The dragoon raises his hand to the rock cliff face in front of him. It shimmers, having recognized the lingering magic in him bestowed by the witch of the cave. He glances down at the near delirious man draped over his shoulder, and pulls him further along. ]

Move your feet, Aymeric. I will not allow you to lay as if you were a sack of pototos.

[ The dim lights of the cave shimmer to give an eerie and yet oddly warm effect. The cave ought to be dark and dank, perhaps even cold and lifeless. However, there is a sense of home and hearth within it. One Estinien had encountered shortly before his brother's own curse. With a look above, it would seem the night sky twinkles with how the light shimmers off the ceiling. He had once thought the place oddly magical in a way... until he truly realized his fate with the deal he had struck with her.

Before the threshold that wound enter to the living space of the cave, there stands the witch Matoya herself. Smaller in stature than one might think with the title and legends surrounding her. Petite even. Her two toned gaze looks at the pair of Elezen. The large hat atop her head hides the ears that would betray her own race, and yet instead, merely the tail that stands practically on end can be seen. ]

I have not the patience for any pageantry nor long winded speeches of prices, witch. Whatever is required to save his life is what I will pay.

[ Matoya's gaze narrows and her mouth opens to retort. Yet, at the last moment, she finds the words stolen. Her gaze falls to the man the Azure Dragoon aids in helping. His features are striking, yet, it is the gaze behind the blue eyes that causes the breath to catch in her throat. He is handsome, yes, but his gaze strikes deep into her core. A gaze she cannot help but feel she knows oh so well...

She stands to the side and raises a fingerless leather gloved hand for Estinien to take the man further in. Her gaze never leaves him, feeling herself drawn and pulled to him. Her heart skips a beat, but then a sense of urgency and anxiety fills her. The blood is obvious to tell on the backside, even to the point where it has begun to seep through the chain mail. She can hardly explain it at the moment, but all her mind can conjure is the word "no."

No, no, no, not like this...

Matoya rushes to the man and Estinien's side. She directs him to lay the man on his side so she might assess the wound and damage. While it is difficult to see, she can very much tell by the way his aether fluxes in and out. Her hands raise to hover above the wound ever so slightly. A dragon's claws had dug deep, rendering flesh and muscle. It would take time to heal. Time, she most certainly had, but there was something else...

He moves slightly and she sees it, barely, from the corner of his mouth. A fang.

Vampire.

Her heart sinks, even if she does not fully understand why in that moment. What had happened to him? Why him? The thought makes far from sense, but, the painful beats of her heart gives seems to back up those thoughts. The rim of her large hat shrouds the expression of worry and fear on her face as her trembling fingers raise to the man's face. ]

Stand watch at the entrance and make certain you were not followed, Varlineau. You were not supposed to return until your end of the deal was finished...

[ ...but thank you for bringing him to me.

Matoya waits until she is certain that the footprints of the begrudged dragoon have left. Then, the trembling fingers brush the hair from the other man's face. He is a vampire, but he lives, and the wound is one she can certainly heal. The tips of her fingers move along his skin in a gesture she means to keep hidden.

Then, with both hands moving to his back, and her eyes close. His aether remains and thus she simply needs to pull it in the direction where she might weave it together once more. His muscles first, then the tendons and skins. She hopes he might remain unawares throughout the affair for his own sake. ]

Leave this to me. I will see to it you are back on your feet.

[thewayforpeace]

[ As is common in times of outright war and fighting, time seems to move far too quickly. That surely was the case for Aymeric even as he did his best to fight against the oncoming attacks from the relentless dragons. He was holding his own, of course, but all it takes is one moment of inattentiveness, of leaving oneself exposed, giving the enemy the chance to slip in. And slip in they did; or rather, one dragon seized its chance, raking its claws against his back and leaving deep scores even beneath the layer of protective chain mail. Even the strongest armor cannot stand up against dragon claws, as he and many others have found out.

The last thing that he wished for was to be half-carried, half-dragged from the field of battle by his best friend and brother, but walking on his own seems out of the question. His vision seems to cloud and clear again by turns, and his legs do not want to do what he asks. Still, when the command to move his feet comes from Estinien, he does his best to comply, although the barely noticeable shuffle hardly counts as movement.

If he but had the strength, he could hold his head up and not appear as dead weight that Estinien has to carry, but such an action seems beyond him now. At least he has not entirely lost his hold on his senses and still remains conscious as the two of them make their way into the cave. It has not fully registered that this is a cave, but it seems that they are at least out of the elements.

Neither does it register with him that the woman Estinien is speaking to has paused to stare at him. Indeed, very little is registering with him at the moment, as his wound continues to leak blood and rendering him far weaker than he would like to be. Part of it stems from his sense of pride, of not wanting to be seen while he is barely conscious and unable to stand on his own. And yet there is nothing to be done for it, as he cannot control his own limbs nor manage to speak a word of protest.

Against his will, a low moan escapes him as Estinien places him on the ground as directed by Matoya, positioning him until he is lying on his side with his injured back exposed for her perusal. Perhaps this is where he will meet his end. There are worse places to be, and at least Estinien is there. How strange that he might expire here, and not in the throes of battle, or that he did not do so when he was first turned from himself into the creature he is now. Death comes for everyone, and perhaps it has finally come for him.

With his failing senses, he cannot make out the words that Matoya speaks, but he feels more than sees Estinien leaving the cave. Why he has left, he does not know, but he lacks the strength to further contemplate his departure.

Once it is just him and Matoya in the cave, he lies there, unable to look to see what she is doing. Although his senses are quite muted and barely functioning, he still registers the tips of her fingers as they move along his skin. He hovers between awareness and senselessness, but he has just enough presence of mind to detect that she is about to attempt something. Healing, perhaps, or something else, something less altruistic. Surely Estinien would not have brought him here for any other reason but healing, but he is a vampire: something not welcome in every circle of society.

Too many would just as soon see him eliminated as being allowed to continue living, and although such thoughts are quite a bit beyond his ability to comprehend right now, there nevertheless is the hazy thought that he may not leave this cave alive, whether by a blow from Matoya's hand or simply because he expires on his own. ]

[shepherdtostars]

[ The moan sends a feeling of panic through her. Why, she has no true certain idea of. There had been handfuls of people she healed once, with wounds just as dire, but the panic she feels this time is different. It does not come from the sense of a race against time. That is certainly there, but, the emotion comes from deep in her heart. Perhaps even her soul if she had the time to think of it instead of acting.

Matoya tilts her head down so her hat may help hide her face as she works. The process is slow, and she can feel how his aether wishes to slip away from her. The emotions are all charged into the aether to give a sense of... resignation? Another wave of panic strikes her at the realization.

No, no. Not like this. Not now. Not when I have finally found you...

The collected side of her scoffs and baffles at thr thoughts that carry along side her emotions. She found him? Had she ever been looking for someone outside this cave? Surely not. She is just as resigned to this fate as he must surely be his. Although, a vampire would be far more accepted in the circles of the Holy See of Ishgard than a witch...

She leans down so her lips are close to his ear. Her hands press against his back ever so lightly to take hold of the aether and weave it together once more. ]

Breathe deep for me. Inhale, than exhale. [ Matoya's head tilts ever so slightly so her lips brush against his ear. If anything, he might be able to feel the words and sense the gentleness in them if he cannot hear her. ] In, then out, in, and then out again.

[ She feels his aether react and quickly mends it once more. The muscles heal, and then tendons, and finally iy leaves the skin needing to be covered so it might mend on its own. She will need to remove his armor to do so, but she finds herself hesitating and a wave of embarrassment hit her. Why? She has seen plenty of men who one would find attractive, and yet...

It's him.

Matoya reaches around his frame to tilt his head towards her. Her face is still incredibly close to his, gaze immediately locking onto his once his sky-blue eyes open. A brief moment passes where she feels as if she has forgotten how to breathe as their eyes meet. Her heart pounds faster. ]

I would need to remove your armor to see to the rest, Ser Knight. [ Her voice is soft and her tone low with the fingers on his face shaking slightly at the intensity of her own reaction. ] You have lost so much blood as well... and will need to replenish it.

[thewayforpeace]

[ Perhaps that sense of resignation comes from a feeling that he has had on occasion that he is simply on borrowed time. Perhaps he should not have survived the attack that turned him into who he is now, or perhaps, following his turning, he was never meant to live very long. He cannot see into the future, of course, so he cannot speak to his lifespan, but perhaps this is fate deciding that for him.

But, all things considered, if this is where he is to meet his end and finally expire, it is a much better fate than he could have envisioned. At least he is not alone here, even if he could not have predicted his end would come inside a witch's cave.

Even with his diminished awareness of where he is and what Matoya is doing, enough has registered with him to conclude that she is at least kind and doing what she can to help, even if he does not deserve it. The words do not quite penetrate his faded senses, but he dimly registers the feel of her lips brushing against his ear, and he does sense the gentleness and care behind them.

It is mostly an involuntary action, but he does as she has asked, although his breath remains erratic and not strong at all.

But still, her efforts are doing their part to restore his strength, and finally, after what feels like many minutes, he is able to open his eyes once more. Still, he has to fight to hold onto awareness, and perhaps eventually, he will lose his grip once more, but for the moment, he can at least see who it is who has been helping him.

It takes him a few moments to fully grasp the meaning of her words, but he understands that she needs his armor to be removed. The other part of her sentence also reaches him, but he pushes that thought away, and if he had the strength, he would very clearly recoil from such a thought. He may be a vampire, and she may not be implying anything at all, simply stating a fact, but he has long since concluded that he would rather not feed off people if he can avoid it.

What he can do, however, is attempt to remove the armor that is evidently an obstruction. But while his wound has begun to heal thanks to her ministrations, he still lacks the strength to move his arms, despite his best efforts. No words come, but a low rumble betraying his displeasure at himself and his present weakness escapes him. ]

🕯️ — homebound.

[shepherdtostars]

( arrow stuff placeholder )

🕯️ — the lord and his lady.

[shepherdtostars]

hidden in the dark. }

[shepherdtostars]

[ Lantaa gently pushes the door open of Manor Borel and steps inside. Her footsteps are light and quiet, almost as if she isn't present at all. What gives away her entry is the way the old door creaks as it shuts and part of her cannot help but wince. Some habits do not leave simply because what is her home has changed. She slowly looks over her shoulder past the blue ribbons in her hair. Behind her is the family steward with a warm smile. He bows to welcome her home, and Lantaa immediately feels her cheeks burn hot. ]

Welcome home, Mistress Alkaid. [ The steward uses her moniker--as she has yet to share her true name with them,but half turns to escort her further into the home. ] Shall I see to a warm bath before dinner?

Where--[ Lantaa pauses to swallow the lingering nervousness she always feels in public. ]--where is Ser Aymeric?

[ At that, the steward pauses. He frowns for a moment before shaking his head ever so slightly. ] He has retired to the bedroom for the last few hours. Shall I go and fetch him?

N-no! No. Please, let me. [ Lantaa steps up beside the steward, twisting her fingers as her hands shake. She is aware that "dinner" is not truly the same when one of them does not need to eat the same way as the other. But, it is time in which she hopes Aymeric might feel even something skin to normal. ] I-I'll see to the bath and ready for dinner...

[ Once more the steward pauses. ] I am not certain he would approve of it. However, it might be for the best. See to him for now, Mistress Alkaid.

[ Before Lantaa can ask what he means, the steward raises a hand and gently pushes her in the direction of the room they share. She looks over her shoulder in worry once more before quietly making her way. Her footsteps barely make a sound and she bites her lip as she can feel the familiar clawing of fear in the back of her mind.

Why wouldn't he approve of... is he angry with me?

Lantaa pauses at the door to their bedroom, her hand shaking as it hovers over the handle. It had only taken a few nights of her being in the manor before both seemed to come to the conclusion it was best to share a room. His room--not his parents. She had thought that perhaps he enjoyed the room feeling as one again, instead of a place he curled and hid in. Her hand shakes further at the possible ideas as to why her beloved may not approve of her presence. Perhaps Aymeric had changed his mind? Perhaps he no longer needed her to share the space with?

She shuts her eyes for a moment and curls her hand around the handle. The shaking continues up her arm and into her whole person until even as she opens the door enough to look inside. His form hunched over while sitting on the bed is not hard to see even if the curtains have been mostly drawn to cast a shadow inside. Lantaa once more swallows the emotions in her throat and steps inside.

Then, she realizes what it is that she has walked in on.

Her eyes first move to the rat in his hands, then up to his face. Her ears are pressed to her head, but she is not afraid, disgusted, or even disappointed in what she sees. He had mentioned he fed off rats, but, seeing it for herself is something else entirely. She knew, without even asking, that he would not wish for anyone to see when he fed off her. Yet, now, there is a sense of full understanding that settles into her. Not of how animalistic he can be as a voidsent, but of how much he must truly despise what he is if he hides away as such.

Even from her.

Lantaa looks at the rat in his hands once more before she quietly closes the door behind her. She wordlessly moves to the bathroom to fetch a few items: the small wastebin and a towel that she dampens. A moment later she returns and just as quietly stands in front of him. She raises the bin by only a few inches to indicate he can place his "meal" inside once he has finished. Her other hand curls around the damp cloth as another wave of realization strikes her.

He would rather hide in the dark and feed away from her rather than allow her to help him.

She naively thought that he might one day accept that particular form of help from her. That she may not need to play off his instincts and desire for her to have him feed. That she might be able to care for him as not only a knight, but as the voidsent he was turned into. Such a thing is clearly not the case as reality strikes down a dream of sorts. The realization feels more akin to a dull blade pushed into her heart than a cold splash of water to her face. She would much prefer the later sensation, as all she can feel is a numb pain inside her as her hands still shake slightly.

Lantaa drops her gaze from him to give him some sort of privacy, as leaving the room would not undo her intrusion. The bin remains raised for him.

...have I ever been able to help you in any life at all? ]

[thewayforpeace]

[ By the time Lantaa returns to the manor, the hour has grown late; not so late that all in Ishgard have retired for the evening, but Aymeric retreated to his room after exchanging a few words with the steward. None were needed, exactly, but he knew he needed to give the other man the consideration of telling him of his plans, such as they were. An evening with nothing but a rat for company is hardly a desirable thing to imagine, but the steward has been with him for too long for such a thing to trouble him. Privately, Aymeric is grateful for his continued presence, as he would be at a loss without the stability and quiet support that the steward provides.

Regardless, he retreats to his room, ensures that all the curtains are drawn and closed, and then he sets about what is surely a distasteful affair to anyone who is not a voidsent.

He has already pierced the unfortunate creature that is to be his dinner, and has begun feeding while, unbeknownst to him, Alkaid and the steward are exchanging words. There never was a reason to lock the door, or otherwise bar it from opening, and he truly has nothing to hide, but this is something no one should have to see. Still, at the moment, his thoughts are on his grisly business, not on the goings-on outside of the room he now shares with Alkaid.

In a way, the business of feeding gives him time to think and sort out his thoughts, and he has quite a few of those to sort through now: namely the protection and care of Alkaid, who is just as much an outsider as he is, at least by his reckoning. There is much that the two of them will have to adjust to, but he is at least confident that they will adapt and adjust quickly enough.

As he continues to feed, his thoughts fade into the background, and all he is aware of is the blood slipping down his throat as he slides into a sort of daze. But then he hears the sound of the door handle turning and hears more than sees the door begin to open. No, not now... She must not see...

He freezes in place, rat still in hand, while his eyes travel down to his fingers that are bloodstained, knowing that blood also must be on his face and mouth as well. But it is too late to hide what remains of the rat or himself, as the door has opened fully and she has stepped inside.

Perhaps if he does not look at her, she will not see what a distasteful creature he is. She moves over to the bathroom, and for a moment, he lets out a quiet exhale of breath. Perhaps she needed to use it, and once she has finished, she will leave the darkened room to the other warmer, friendlier parts of the house. At least then he might have the opportunity to clean himself up and then offer his apologies for what she saw.

But he freezes yet again once he realizes she has returned and is now standing in front of him, a wastebin in her hand. She means for him to place the rat inside it, but as soon as that realization sinks in, he finds himself shaking his head. He means to bring the rat outside and dispose of it properly, thus sparing her or anyone else inside the house from having to deal with it.

On occasion, he leaves the remains for the old household cat to find, but more often than not, he makes use of the spot he has designated for burying the remnants. In a strange way, at least the act of burying them makes him feel more like a person and less of a monster.

The rat still remains in his hand, as he still feels frozen in place. She may have allowed her gaze to drop, but he feels as though he has just been exposed as the ugly creature he feels he is, and there is nowhere he can go to hide. In a moment or two, he finds his voice, and although it shakes when he speaks, he says: ]

I am sorry. I did not wish for you to see. I- I meant to finish my business here and then be there to welcome you when you returned.

[ But it seems as though all he has managed to do is make a mess of things instead. He certainly would not fault her if she asked to resume sleeping in his parents' room, after seeing the state of this one and what he has done inside it. ]

[shepherdtostars]

[ The head of the Astrologian Guild had insisted on speaking with her days after they arrived in Ishgard. He had consulted with stars and cards, even his own soul crystal, determined to believe she was to inherit those duties. Lantaa had wished to deny the offer entirely. Especially when the Astrologian had correctly deduced she was a natural healer. Lantaa felt pinned in spot as the familiar fear washed over her, but the man did not continue to pry or make assumptions. Instead, he merely asked she come to the Guild and see to basic studies. She had agreed only at the encouragement of those in the Manor.

That afternoon and into the evening had been the conclusion of her first week there. She left every afternoon and would come home at various times. She had meant to inform Aymeric at dinner of everything through the day, but such a thing has slipped her mind as he feeds.

He truly has no need of even making the appearance of attending human dinners. She should have known such was the case. Instead, she had convinced herself she was helping him feel more human and like who he was before. Just as she had led herself to believe he needed her aid in balancing his instincts.

He shakes his head to the offered bin and she feels as if the dull blade pushes further into her heart. Lantaa remains silent. She lowers the bin, standing there for a brief moment. Then, she moves back to the bathroom to return the bin to its place. She watches her tremoring hand before curling it in an attempt to calm herself. The notion does little to help as realization upon realization domino in her mind.

He does not wish her aid in feeding, or caring for himself as a voidsent. Why would he wish her care to his person as a knight?

The ancient part of her soul that normally yearns and begs for his affection almost feels as numb as her heart does. Perhaps she has already failed him in this life. Had she only overcome her fear and left when Master Matoya and her other student had. Then, maybe...

Lantaa moves once more to stand in front of him. Her eyes remain casted down to give him privacy so he might finish. The tip of her tail twitches at his words. He truly had no intentions of ever asking her to aid him or be the one to care for his hunger. Why had she not seen it before? How could she have convinced herself that he would ever ask her, let alone need her, in such a way now that the major injuries had been healed? Her heart gives a painful beat and through the numbness she feels the cut deepen at her own childish dreams.

I have always failed in helping you, my love. No matter what lives we live. Always...

The feeling comes from deep inside her soul. The same place her unconditional love flows endlessly. She hopes the pain does not show on her face. This is not his fault and it never has been. The blame lies with her, thinking that perhaps in this life it might be different.

Lantaa raises the damp towel for him to take. She does not offer her aid or ask if he would wish her to help in cleaning himself after his meal. He would say no to the offer yet again.

Once he has taken it from her, she folds her hands together. It does not take long for the shaking to return to them. She hopes that he does not notice even once she presses them into the blue velvet dress given to her by the Guild. ]

You have seen me eat. [ Her voice returns to the hushed tones. ] I-I don't mind. You need to eat... I should have knocked. N-next time I will. I-I'm sorry...

[ Please don't throw me away... I'm sorry, my love... I'm sorry... I only wish to help you carry this burden in this life...

Her head lowers a fraction more as she folds her fingers together to try and steady her hands. No longer will she ask if he would like her aid in the matter. She will only insist he have her blood if the circumstances are dire. He has a system in place, and she should not have tried inserting herself into it. It is selfish of her to turn the affair into something about herself. Therefore, Lantaa curls her hands together further and attempts to push everything down and away. ]

S-should I leave you to finish? I-I can wait outside.

[thewayforpeace]

[ The worst part of all this is that the second Aymeric shakes his head, seemingly rejecting the offered wastebin and everything else that Alkaid is offering him, he knows he has made a mistake. He wants to let her in, to let her help him, because while he has quite thoroughly locked himself away in so many different ways, he wants to be helped. He wants to be loved and cared for, to feel as though he is more than the monster he believes he has become. But the problem is, he does not know how to ask for that help, or how to accept it when it is offered. Instead, it seems as though he only causes hurt and sadness, which in turn causes him to feel worse about himself.

The rat is still clenched in his hand, and his grip upon it tightens instinctively as he draws his arms about himself as he seems to withdraw further into the prison he has created for himself. If only he could break the walls that seem to be around him, to show her that he wants to accept the love and care she is trying to give him. He wants nothing more than to be loved and to love in return, but he does not know how. Perhaps he could ask her to show him, but has she not already done so much for him? To ask for more would be selfish.

Why am I so very bad at this? All I want is to let someone in, to no longer be alone, but I- I cannot. His shoulders curl forward just slightly as a feeling of despair that he cannot be rid of settles on him once more. Surely now she will leave, because who would remain with someone who refuses to cooperate? Even someone as kind and good as her must have her limit, and he imagines that they have now reached that limit.

At first, he thought that he would refuse to take the towel, but he knows he cannot refuse her again, and so he takes it with one hand, fingers curling around it but not using it to clean the blood that remains from his feeding. Instead, his shoulders begin to shake, slowly at first but increasing in speed.

Her words echo in his mind, repeating themselves over and over, but it is not the entirety of what she said that he hears. Instead, his mind has focused on the first four words that she spoke, and that is what he hears echoing in his thoughts.

Should I leave you?

His hands clench again, tighter this time, and he has all but forgotten that he holds a dead rat in one of them. Nothing matters except the knowledge that she will leave, and he will be alone, and all because he does not know how to let another person in.

His voice and his breath feel as if something is choking them, preventing him from speaking and even breathing, but he knows he must say something. ]

Please... don't leave. I- I'm sorry. [ His gaze lowers, eyes traveling to stare at the ground, because he knows he could not bear to see the look on her face as she tells him she must go. It is what he deserves, but he still does not wish to see it. ]

cont. }

[shepherdtostars]

( from here)

[ Lantaa pauses as he falters, fingers curling into his hair to try and soothe him. Her posture changes once he speaks. She sinks against him and presses a gentle kiss to the covered scars of the mark that changed him. His proposal does hurt, but only because it is the truth. Perhaps things could have been done to avoid it by his attacker. Perhaps if Aymeric was not there it would of been another. Ultimately, it is his life changed, and now something for the pair of them to learn how to move forward with. ]

Perhaps not, but, it does not change how I wish I had found you sooner. [ She gently nudges her nose against his shoulder once more. ] You will not need to imagine it, as it will never happen. I'll be here for you, waiting for you to come home, no matter how far away they send you away for war.

[ Lantaa entirely relaxes in his hold the moment he begins to brush her hair. Her ears droop lazily and a breath escapes her. She seems to almost cuddle against him with her tail swaying ever so slightly beside them. He suggests that they turn in for the night, and she wholeheartedly agrees. Their minds seem to act as one at the same time. She eases into his hold as he picks her up and they make their way to their room. Lantaa makes a mental note to apologize to the house staff in the morning for the scene.

She changes to her sleeping attire, and aids him in his, then does her best to tend to the fire. She gently takes the rat wrapped in the cloth and places it in the wastebin for the moment, that way Aymeric can take care of the poor creature in the morning to how he wishes. However, it seems the small amount of strength to do such things is spent, an d she crawls into bed. Her arms extend for him to join her, where she comfortably curls up against his chest and runs her fingers down his arm to lure him into sleep with her. ]

[thewayforpeace]

[ The scars should not hurt as they are long healed, but at times he thinks he imagines that he still feels discomfort coming from them, even if it is only in his mind. Her kiss to the once-injured area causes him to relax by just a fraction, although he is not sure if it counts as relaxing or if it is a response to a somewhat sensitive area. ]

Perhaps I should resign my post within the ranks. [ So that I might stay here with you is the part that goes unsaid. He does feel like an impostor within the ranks of soldiers, and yet the part of him that wanted to become one of the Temple Knights still exists. Becoming a vampire did not take that from him. ] If I did, then you would not be alone.

[ But perhaps such a conversation is one best had another time, and not when both of them are tired and worn out from a trying handful of days. Once their sleeping attire is seen to, the fire tended, and the rat that Aymeric was (shamefully, in his mind) consuming temporarily disposed of, he follows her into the bed, moving to lie beside her.

He smiles when she curls up against him, and it does not take very long at all for him to drift off to sleep. It is not until several hours later that a feeling of discomfort and a sort of hungry emptiness threatens to disturb his sleep. His mouth turns down into a frown, and he tosses and turns briefly before his eyes slide open. The room is dark, but that does not bother him.

Of course, Lantaa remains asleep, undisturbed by a hunger that can't be filled with the kind of food the whole and unsullied people consume. He does not wish to wake her or disturb her with his own sleeplessness, so he wills himself to lie as still as possible.

Perhaps sleep will return to him in a moment or two if he simply lies there and lets his mind wander. He would slide from the bed in search of a rat, but that would certainly qualify as a disturbance. ]

[shepherdtostars]

[ She smiles at the tension leaving from her small kiss. Regardless if it is truly relaxing or merely an effect of a gentle touch? She is glad to see some relief can be brought to the old wound and the condition he has been given. ]

But, then you wouldn't be protecting Ishgard... and, despite it all, I imagine that is still important to you. [ But, yes, perhaps the conversation is best left for when they are are not exhausted.

Lantaa sleeps well enough. Not deep enough for dreams, but it is still a sleep filled with content. The ancient part of her seems to be finally at ease. There are times in her sleep she still reaches a hand out towards Aymeric, with her fingers curling in his shirt slightly, but never enough to stop him from moving. Especially as he becomes restless.

Despite his attempts to remain motionless, some part of her has come to realize he is no longer resting. Her ears give a slightly twitch before she instinctively curls up against him. A moment later she gently nudges her nose into his chest before her eyes begin to open followed by her tail stretching out beneath the covers before draping over their legs. ]

...Aymeric...? [ Sleep still resides in her voice as her eyes finally travel up to his with a slight frown on her face. Why is he awake? Has something happened? ] Did something wake you...?

morning. }

[shepherdtostars]

( cont from here)

[ His speech stops and actions take over, and so, she follows his direction. His name--both current and ancient--slip from her lips from time to time. Yet, conversations and long explanations seemingly no longer exist. Why should they? The pair have known one another for ages in many different lives. If they must relearn how to pleasure one another? It most certainly will not take long.

Clothes are shed, they shift as they continue to indulge. All that has ever truly mattered to her in this life is him, and thus filling her senses with him is far from difficult. She is only here because he wished to live another mortal life with the hopes of being with her. Nothing else matters to her than moments where everything is stripped away other than them.

Time catches up to them in the way of fatigue. At one point or another she moved to be atop of him, and that is where she drifted off to sleep, listening to his steady heartbeat. Her head rests on his chest with her dark hair down to frame her body along his. She does not dream, and instead, simply falls into a deeper content sleep against him.

The sun rays find their ways into the room through partings on the curtains. Her ear twitches at the feeling of warmth across the fur. A warm temperature for the winter day is promised, but, Lantaa simply seems to melt more into the hold of the man she has known for so very long.

Another sense stirs her to be awake. Perhaps it is the awareness that he is already awake, or the fact his gentle protective gaze is on her. It could even very well be his caresses. Whichever the case might be, Lantaa's eyes open slowly then shut. She shifts slightly, pulling herself up to her hands and knees. Then, she shifts backwards to stretch her back, then forwards to stretch it in another way. Her tail straightens below the sheets as well. Once she feels the stiffness removed? Lantaa returns to laying down atop and curls her tail at their sides to embrace him as well.

She sets her chin on his chest so she might look evenly into his sky blue eyes. The ones that make her heart skip a beat and seem to convey so much more emotion than the rest of him. She loves him so very much. ]

Good morning, my knight.

[thewayforpeace]

[ For him, once sleep begins to take hold of them both, pulling them down and away from awareness and headed towards rest, he is content to let it do so. He does not need much sleep, maintaining that he can get by with a handful of hours. But that was before he had someone to share his bed with: someone to hold and be held by while resting. Perhaps he does not need to sleep for extended periods of time, but he is finding that he wishes to, solely because it is more time that he gets to spend with her.

And when he inevitably awakens before her, he is quite content to lie there and observe her, watching the way she shifts occasionally in her sleep and smiling when he notes that her ears and tail twitch at intervals.

As he watches her sleep, he thinks to himself that he would do anything and everything to ensure that they continue to be able to have moments like this: uninterrupted time together with nothing coming between them. Perhaps it is unrealistic and impractical, but they are a pair, and he does not wish to be separated from her for any reason at all. If only he had the power to ensure that his wish could be fulfilled.

But grasping for too much would only set himself up for disappointment, and so he wills himself to be content with what he has. He lightly places one hand against one of her ears, stroking it with a fingertip until he sees that she has begun to awaken.

When she shifts and begins to stretch, a warm smile crosses his face. He truly does love her because of who she is, and her little movements and stretches only endear her to him more.

Once her chin has settled upon his chest and she is looking into his eyes, he looks downward to meet her gaze. ]

Good morning. I hope that you slept well.

[shepherdtostars]

[ The truth of her asking to promise that they will remain together is highly unrealistic, and that is something she knows. Anything in the mortal life could pull them away both temporarily and for the rest of their lives. He could be called away to war and slain without her able to aid him, or she could be found by those that hunted her people. Something as simple as illness could part them. All these factors are known to her, and yet, she cannot help the ancient part of her soul that reaches out to his and begs him to remain with her.

Lantaa tilts her head slightly so that her ear once again rests against his fingers to encourage he continues touching it. Her nose gently nudges into his bare chest before she allows herself to melt against him once more. She had never thought it possible that she would be with someone as she is with him: bare in a bed with nothing to hide. She never thought she would find her someone--or that her someone would wish to be with an accursed witch, and a heretical white mage. ]

I did... did you? [ She gently kisses his collar bone, below where the scar from the bite remains. Her eyes are still filled with love, but, she clearly worries for his health still. ] Have you been awake long?

[ Her arms shift beside them to rest at either side of his chest. ]

call to arms. }

[notoncenotever]

( cont from here )

[ Jonathan is not one who would bet on fate. He is a man of science--despite how much the Church seems to be against such things--and a man of practicality. Aether, gravity, the way in which the body works. Those things are constants and never changing, unless some outside force changes such things. As is true for Aymeric, so it is true for him. An outside force caused them to change, to mold into a different sort of life. A voidsent, they call it. Yet, it is very different from most voidsents. They are not mindless beasts who feast endlessly on aether. They retain their sanity, their livelihoods, their very souls.

Yet, the needs of the many have always outweighed his own. He remains a healer, a doctor, no matter what or who changed him. Obligations to society are in order as well. While Aymeric had been of young when his parents had passed? Jonathan had agreed to continue to guide and watch over him as he aged into adulthood. He was proud to see that Aymeric had remained with the Temple Knights despite his own unfortunate change. While the young Elezen may not see it? He still holds a life to some degree. Aymeric serves as a Temple Knight, and Reid serves as a doctor to the voidsent... and to clear them for duty.

Which, it saddens him to say, is the reason why he has come to visit this evening.

Jonathan turns from the admiration of the books on the shelves once Aymeric finally joins them. Estinien makes himself comfortable against the wall, arms crossed, seemingly disinterested in it all. However, it is Estinien who has brought the news of their call to service, while Johnathan is simply there to make certain that Aymeric is still of sound mind to serve. ]

Ah, there you are, Aymeric. I take it that you have rested well for the day? [ A casual glance is sent to the dragoon as he scoffs slightly. He shakes his head before turning back to the Elezen with a smile. ] I hope it is not too much of an intrusion that your staff allowed us entrance while you were occupied elsewhere.

[thewayforpeace]

[ Aymeric might be the first to say that he and Reid are somewhat opposites. The older man is far more down to earth than Aymeric tends to be, even though his thoughts and feelings have somewhat changed along with the change to who and what he is. His thoughts may not be in the clouds, but sometimes they do seem to hover a little bit off the ground.

Regardless, Aymeric respects Reid immensely and greatly looks forward to his occasional visits. Even when those visits come with somewhat stern lectures, Aymeric remains grateful for them and for Reid's company. Not many remained following his turning, and he is so very grateful to the few who did.

In his mind, Reid is the closest thing he has to a father figure, and he responds to him as such. Whatever reason has brought Reid back here today, Aymeric does not know, but he is happy to see him. ]

My apologies for keeping you both waiting. I- Well, it was not intended. [ Neither does he regret the additional time he shared with Lantaa in slumber, but he does regret keeping both Reid and Estinien waiting. ] It was no intrusion at all. You are both welcome here any time you please.

[ He does not often receive visitors, much less friends coming to call, so he has no intentions of begrudging either of them. ]

I imagine that some errand or purpose brings you here.

[notoncenotever]

[ For being an older man? Jonathan truly was not much older than Aymeric when he was changed. He too is gifted with eternal age, and yet, it is his lived life that makes him appear as older. He has lived more of a century and seen how Ishgard has changed since the deals made with the voidsent. He and Aymeric are proof of that change. ]

There is no need to apologize. Our schedules are rather... opposite from normal ways. [ Still, he smiles at the welcome and glances once more at the dragoon who would quite obviously prefer to be elsewhere. ] Unfortunately, yes. Social calls will need to wait I am afraid.

[ Estinien takes the moment to raise his head and look at his longest (and only) friend. He has done away with his helmet for now, and dressed in more casual clothing. One might expect a knight to look more professional, yet, Estinien has never cared much for it. ]

We have been called away for the weekend. Training, they call it. [ Estinien gives a huff and roll of his eyes. ] Either because the Garleans are threatening Eorzea, or the Astrologians believe the sighting of a dragon star might be possible. Pick whichever reason you find best suiting and it will be most likely the one they insist upon.

[ Jonathan nods. ] And, as such, I have been asked to make certain any and all peoples like us are capable of performing their duties with... as little resistance as possible. Standard procedure, as always, of course. Especially given Ser Estinien reported you had a rather extensive injury that had been healed by the time you returned to Ishgard.

[ The doctor glances once more at the dragoon as he gives an annoyed huff. ]

[shepherdtostars]

[ Lantaa watches as Aymeric escorts Jonathan once their talks have concluded. She still feels exposed and open for the world to see. The logical side of her insits that is for the best, as, Aymeric would need a lady who could go out among the public and be seen with big. The other, louder side, wishes nothing more than to crawl into the covers on the bed and hide until she feels safe once more. It is a conundrum and one she is not sure how to solve.

Her gaze moves to the letter that has been given its wax seal. With a glance behind her, Lantaa reaches out and gently takes it in her hands. The words ring in her mind. Once more, the logical side attempts to wrestle control. Training is bound to happen, especially as he is a Temple Knight. He will be safe and come home.

...But this isn't the first time...

Once more, feelings and emotions from a life lived so very long ago resurface. They called him away to war. Outsiders with their war machines and ships had come, and they called him to the frontlines. He promised to come home. Instead, a letter was delivered, explaining he and his unit hard perished. There was nothing to retrieve...

Lantaa closes her eyes to try and bottle the waves of sorrow and fear that strike her. It's not the letter with Jonathan's seal she sees in her hands. A different seal sits there with different writing from an age long forgotten. She knew something had gone wrong, but she had convinced herself otherwise. She knew something happened, but wanted to believe otherwise. They had just been wed...

Lantaa lowers her head and bites her lip. Now is hardly the time. Yet, it seems her heart and soul have once again decided to open wounds from long ago. ]

[thewayforpeace]

[ Aymeric escorts Jonathan to the door and they exchange a few words before they part ways. He cannot help but express in a few words how he wishes he did not have to leave, but they both know that there is nothing to be done. There is not much that Jonathan can say, as Aymeric's responsibility is what it is, but he offers what commiseration he can.

Eventually, he departs and Aymeric returns to where Alkaid is waiting. He is uncertain what he should say, or how much of what he feels he should tell her, but perhaps they do not need to say anything.

He walks over to where she is, and he pauses in the doorway. Clearly she is upset, and so is he, but of the two of them, he feels she needs the comfort now more than he does. ]

May I come in, or would you like a moment?

cont.

[thewayforpeace]

[ From here ]

[ If Aymeric were capable of it, he would offer a great many apologies to his friend and the closest thing he has to a brother for troubling him once more. Estinien also left with him, having also received the same orders that he had, and so he was present when Aymeric found himself contending with the unfortunate consequences of drinking the blood of a sick animal.

If he had not already consumed the blood given to him by Lantaa and stored inside a flask, he would not have resorted to hunting and eating a rat, but he found himself faced with going hungry or finding an animal from which to feed. Unfortunately for him, the animal he located was not a healthy one. Of course, he did not notice anything being amiss until several hours later when a cascade of symptoms seemingly crashed upon him so quickly that it might as well have been all at once.

Perhaps some kind of fortune was on his side after all, as this happened the night before they were due to return to Ishgard, their training maneuvers complete for the time being. Of course, Aymeric does not feel fortunate at all, as the symptoms of infection set in. And by morning, it is quite clear that he is in no condition to be walking anywhere, which is where Estinien comes in. The dragoon sighs and gives off a show of annoyance, but it is mostly for show and not how he truly feels.

The contingent of knights eventually returns to Ishgard, and Estinien makes his way to Borel Manor. Along the way, he has alternated between pulling Aymeric along with one arm draped over his shoulder and carrying him for as long as he can manage. Now that the manor is just steps away, he has returned to the former, silently complaining to himself about this whole affair. Of course, he does not blame Aymeric for his present state; he is, however, just a bit disgruntled about having to drag his friend along like a sack of bricks, even though he is still showing more consideration than that.

Soon enough, he'll be able to deposit him into the care of others, if luck is with him. If the person who has caught Aymeric's eye is about, Estinien has no doubt that she will help, even if he still casts a doubting eye in her direction. Still, the alternative is not one he cares to entertain, as he does not have very many friends, and he does not wish to lose the one he has. If he had the ability to practice any sort of medicine at all, he would just as soon tend to Aymeric himself, but he is not skilled in that capacity beyond basic first aid. That is where the so-called witch comes in.

And when his steps lead him to the manor, he eyes the door, wondering if he should knock and wait to be let in or simply open the door and deposit Aymeric into Lantaa's care. He would just as soon do that, but he supposes niceties need to be observed, and so he raps on the door twice and waits for a response. ]

[shepherdtostars]

[ The nights in Ishgard have grown colder as winter begins to set in.

It is a thought that settles on Lantaa as she lays in the bed her pair has shared with her. She lays on his side, curled uo with her back to the door. More than a few weeks have passed since he was called away. Letters had been exchanged per his request, but she has still felt a particular hollowing emptiness inside. Meteion and the staff have done their best to fill it, but she knows only her pair can truly fill that gap.

Time has passed to the point where his spot no longer has his indent and warmth. Yet, alongside sleeping in his shirts, it is the closest she can be to him until he returns home.

Lantaa only stirs from her thoughts of loneliness that night with a knocking of the door. She turns to see the head maid opening the door and urging her from bed for an emergency. She responds as bid, grabbing her night robe and following closely behind the older Elezen.

They cross the doorframe to the sitting room and she stops dead in her tracks.

Estinien has deposited Aymeric on the large couch and hovers nearby with his arms crossed. The maid frets and the steward attempts to ask questions of Estinein on her behalf. However, her gaze is purely on her other half. Hes come home, as he promised, but...

Lantaa suddenly finds herself at his side and not entirely sure when she moved. She falls to her knees beside him. Hands raise to his face to gently rest on his cheeks. She nudges him gently before lowering her lips to his ear so only he might hear her. ]

Aymeric, [ The familiar alluring tone is there despite her shaking voice. There is no magic or spell. Merely a statement to lure him to look at her. ] Aymeric... l-look at me. Please.

[thewayforpeace]

[ Aymeric remained aware of bits and pieces of the journey from the training grounds to Ishgard and to the manor, but his moments of being lucid were short, and more often than not, he was in a state of lethargy and confusion.

Even when Estinien deposited him upon the couch in the sitting area, he wanted to do nothing more but lie there and hide his face from the sudden light from the room. Said light was hardly bright at all, but it still managed to leak through his closed eyes and caused him to recoil.

It isn't until he registers the feel of Lantaa's hands on either side of his face that he halts his efforts to hide from the light by attempting to burrow into the couch. His eyes slit open just a fraction and he tries to focus on her face as much as he can. All he wanted to do was come home to her, so at least he has managed that much with Estinien's help.

He wants to reach for her, to hold her hand or touch her hair, but his arms do not seem to be interested in cooperating with him. Moving only seems to cause more discomfort, and he wishes he could simply lie still, but in this moment, reaching out to her is of greater importance.

This is not at all how he imagined his homecoming, once more needing assistance and care from others. After this, he would not blame any of them for dismissing him as too much trouble for them to deal with. ]