synthneon | bloody tears || ❝ our fate so darkly romantic, i will never leave your side. ❞

[ If fear of betraying the secret he has been told and intends to protect at whatever cost was what kept him silent before, it pales in comparison to the feeling of shame that sweeps over him once Estinien finishes giving his explanation. Of course his friend and brother is correct in his account, down to the very last detail of how Aymeric fed from Lantaa. Of course, the retelling does not give away her identity as a white mage, but he still fears that Jonathan, who is more than a little perceptive, will put the pieces together and figure out what it is that he is not saying.

He still does not speak, but he fixes Estinien with a glance that would appear blank except for his slightly widened eyes. He holds his gaze for a few seconds before looking away and back towards Jonathan.

Surely now that he has heard Estinien, his mentor and physician will have more questions for him. And, he imagines, he will not allow him to remain silent. ]

[ Jonathan's eyebrows raise at the tale he is given, as well as the silence from his ward. The silence all but confirms the tale... and yet, why does Aymeric refuse to say a word of it? He is aware Estinien believes his brother to be bewitched, however, this seems a willing silence and not one of forced obedience.]

The Witch of the Wilds? [ Jonathan asks Aymeric to confirm it. Then, he sits back in thought. He rather doubts it is the true Master Matoya. How the elder vampire would know such a thing is a tale for another time. ] And she is here, in Ishgard?

[ Estinien nods. ] She boards here.

...I see. [ Jonathan looks once more to Aymeric. ] I am led to believe all that Ser Estinien says is true. As such, as your physician, I find myself having to ask: is this arrangement mutually agreed by both parties?

[ Perhaps in a way, this is for the best as Aymeric knows he may not have offered the information voluntarily. He certainly does not begrudge Estinien for speaking, although he is presently experiencing no small amount of uncertainty and hesitancy with what he should say next.

At the very least, he gives Jonathan a slow nod to confirm the identity of the person who healed him. And there is a part of him that feels he was foolish to try and conceal these secrets, as he knows well enough that secrets have a way of being found out.

With the knowledge that she resides with him out in the open, he reasons that there is little reason to continue holding his silence. Her true identity will remain hidden, of course, but it would be odd to continue to refuse to speak. ]

It is. [ Reluctantly, on his part, but they have come to an understanding regardless. ] I do not intend to be excessive about it, however. [ He would not feed from her at all, but it seems clear enough to him that she trusts him, and thus he needs to learn to trust himself as well. ]

It would explain why there is a certain color to your person, and a more confident way you hold yourself. [ Jonathan nods. ] It is not for me to make comments or conjectures on how often you feed or not. Such things are for both parties to decide. And, should the agreement be beneficial, and cause no harm to either party or others? Then, you hardly need my approval.

[ Yet, he can tell such answers do not appease Estinien. Not that he is here to please the dragoon. He is here to make certain his ward is capable of continuing his duties as a Temple Knight. As such, he takes one more drink of his bourbon before placing it to the side and standing. Off comes the long coat he wears in order to roll up his sleeves. Now, for the medical examination. ]

I will need to examine the wound and then your reflexes, Aymeric. If you do not mind. [ He nods. ] I imagine with more... nourishing substance, we will see an improvement from last we spoke.

Those things- They are not unwelcome, but I... [ He pauses, searching for the right words to explain how he feels. ] Even with permission and an agreement, it still feels so very wrong. [ Perhaps the admission seems to have come from nowhere and without announcement, but if he cannot tell Jonathan how he feels, who can he tell? Estinien might listen, but would he understand? Aymeric does not wish to saddle his friend with that regardless. ]

The rats do not give their permission either, but- [ He closes his mouth then, cutting off the rest of that sentence. He could lay out all his concerns and worries, but what would it accomplish? The decision to feed or not is a personal one, as Jonathan has said. ]

I see no reason why I would mind, much less refuse. [ He trusts Jonathan, and so he readies himself for the examination. ] Tell me what you need me to do, and I will do it.

That is a discussion you should have with your donor, Aymeric. Not me. [ He shakes his head as he rolls up his sleeves. ] We walk our own paths through this twisted life that we have. If the experience is unpleasant, then, it is something that is of importance to bring up to her.

[ He motions for Aymeric to remove his shirt so he might inspect the wound. Standard medical procedure. ]

I take it that it is the large scar on your back? It was quite the wound. Your... partner is quite skilled at healing. [ Perhaps through aether, given the way that things have healed. However, he will simply let that be for now. ] Was the healing namely her doing or also to replenishment?

[ Aymeric shakes his head then and offers Jonathan a rueful smile. ] I apologize, I was speaking aloud in an attempt to make sense of things that may never fully make sense. She and I have much still to learn and decide upon.

[ He knows that Jonathan did not mean it as a chastisement, but he feels quite small at this present moment when faced with Jonathan's calmness and knowledge.

He contents himself with removing his shirt as requested and sitting still while Jonathan conducts his examination. ] It is indeed, and yes, she is.

[ He shivers involuntarily as if the scar is still sensitive even though it is completely healed. ] The healing was her doing, as was the replenishment. She insisted that it was necessary for my recovery.

Such is the nature of any relationship. My own has been rather... well, shall we say, I was uninformed for most of our starting months. Before it was truly a proper relationship. [ Jonathan gives a wry smile. Now is not the time to discuss such things. ] I hope that for your sake, the two of you come to an agreement.

[ So, this Witch of the Wilds is quite the healer. He cannot say he is too surprised given who her mentor is. Yet, somehow, it seems as if this is a far deeper affair than perhaps Aymeric realizes. ]

She is not wrong. If the wound is as it looks, it would have been fatal, had she not intervened and Ser Estinien made the choice that he did. Even with the wound healed? If you had not fed, I imagine you would still be healing even to this day.

[ He falls silent for a moment or two while Jonathan continues his examination, and as he does, a memory surfaces and he feels obligated to let him know of it. ]

I know that I said I have no interest in throwing away my life, but there was a time while she was at work that I felt a certain resignation... resignation that I might not survive, and that if I did not, it might not be such a bad thing.

But I am still here, and there must be a reason for it. [ He sees no such reason for himself, but now that Lantaa has entered his life, there is a purpose that he did not have before. ]

[ Jonathan does not comment on such feelings. After all, what could he say? The resignation of ones fate is hardly limited to voidsent such as them. It is a matter of finding something that makes their seemingly eternal existence worth it in the end. His calling has always been that of healing and aiding those in need. Perhaps Aymeric has begun to discover his own calling.

He inspects the scar once, twice more, before motioning for Aymeric to place his shirt back on. Then, they begin to test the reflexes. He taps the joints and certain parts in order to see what the response time is. His ward has certainly improved since their last examination, yet, Jonathan feels he should not point out just how vastly improved Aymeric has become. The man is already unsure as it is to feeding from mankind as opposed to small animals. The last thing his ward needs is to believe that his chosen path is faulty or necessary. ]

Perhaps your reason for being here will become clearer in the coming weeks.

[ Jonathan nods and gives a firm shoulder squeeze to the younger Elezen. Then, he turns to the orders and pulls out a marker. Next, he moves to find wax so he might put his official seal on the orders. A seal that marks that Aymeric is fit to continue serving for the time being. ]

I see no reason to hold you away from duty's call. Your reactions are improved, as your general health. Your wounds are healed. By all medical accounts, you are fit as you could ever be. [ Although, perhaps not entirely. He has yet to truly embrace his more voidsent abilities. ] And as Ser Estinien does not need my approval, it would seem the purpose of our visit has come to satisfying conclusion.

[ Estinien turns to look at the doctor then. ] Can you not see how he has been bewitched by her? He would never feed from another living being!

Bewitched, is it? [ Jonathan turns his gaze back to Aymeric and suppresses a smile. ] An interesting phrase to use for the idea of being in love, Ser.

[ Perhaps he ought not have been so forthcoming with his feelings and his thoughts, but at least in this particular instance, they spilled out before he could call them back. While Jonathan completes his examination, Aymeric remains silent once more, moving when his tests require him to, but otherwise keeping still.

That is, until Jonathan comments aloud once more. ] Perhaps it will, and perhaps I will recognize it when it does.

[ Privately, he holds doubts concerning that, but he leaves that unsaid. ]

Very well. [ He understands that orders are orders, and with Jonathan's clearing him for duty, he will be leaving very soon indeed. ] Thank you for your time, as always.

[ He turns slightly to look at Estinien with a raised eyebrow and a shake of his head. Jonathan's answer is the truth of it, although Aymeric finds he cannot stop a hint of a blush from forming at the base of his neck. ]

I can see how it might appear as though I am bewitched, but I am not, although I realize words alone are not reassuring.

[ He is certain that he cannot change Estinien's mind, and expending the energy to do so is not something he wishes to do at the moment. ]

Can you fight alongside someone who may be bewitched? [ The question seems valid enough to him, and so he asks it with little hesitation. ]

For your sake? I hope you do recognize it.

[ Jonathan finishes his seal before sliding it to the side for the mark in the wax to melt. He begins to roll his sleeves down and eyes the two. So, the truth of the matter comes out. Estinien certainly has an odd way of showing his wariness and worry of the woman that has seemingly captivated Aymeric's heart. ]

That would depend if you are bewitched. [ Estinien narrows his eyes. ] She is a witch, Aymeric. How could you be certain you are not under her wiles?

I suppose all I can do is wait and see what comes. [ And since he has no gift of foresight, that will have to be enough. ]

As I said, I am not. She has not bewitched me; we came to an agreement and an understanding. [ He shrugs. All he has is his confidence and even trust that she would not do such a thing to him. ]

You brought me to her for healing, and she has done that, has she not?

[ He is certain that Estinien will harbor doubts no matter what he says, so for the moment, he leaves it there. ]

Yes, and yet you have fed from her, brought her to your home, and have become close to her. A handful of days truly can make such a difference?

[ Jonathan glances between them once more. ] Perhaps now is not the time for such a discussion? Surely the pair of you will have much to discuss when you are on your way to your destination.

[ Estinien scowls before pushing himself up from his leaning position. With one last long glance, he turns and sees himself from the room. Jonathan then turns his attention back to Aymeric with a small shrug. ]

[ Aymeric opens his mouth to reply, but before he can, Estinien has already begun moving and is out of the room before he has time to even say anything.

He glances at Jonathan, shakes his head once, and offers a sigh by way of response. ]

Well, what are your plans now? I imagine you have other things to tend to now that you have conducted your work here.

[ He sees no reason why he should rush Jonathan on his way, but if he says he must depart, he will not delay him unnecessarily. ]

I had thought that perhaps a social call might be in order. It's been some time since I spoke to my ward, after all. [ Jonathan gives a wry smile before taking his seat once more and reaching for his glass. ] While not much has changed in the situation of our political and societal standing? It seems as if much has changed with you.

[ Then, he takes a drink. It does little to sustain hunger, but the taste is what reminds him of being human once so long ago. ] A woman, is it?

I see. Well, I have no complaints about this at all. You will let me know if you would like more, won't you? [ He nods towards Jonathan's drink, still smiling. ]

It is indeed. This is a turn of events that I did not foresee. [ Not that he is gifted with any kind of foresight. ] What do you think?

[ Is he being wholly foolish? If he is, he would rather hear it from Jonathan. ]

I will, thank you. [ He notes it is good to see that manners have remained. Aymeric remains the most human voidsent he has ever seen. Even more than Jonathan himself in many aspects. ] If how Ser Estinien tells the tale is true, then it is quite sudden. However, a unique... bond can form once we have blood from another. That is, if they are not drained and turned.

[ However, he imagines it is quite more than that. Aymeric had withdrawn from all manner of society. She must be quite the woman to have brought back more of the man he knows Aymeric de Borel to be. ]

I imagine she is... something of five foot three? Her weight slightly on the thinner side. Younger than you as well, despite our kind ceasing to age once we have turned. And... [ A pause with a tilt of his head. ] ...a Miqo'te?

[ That is one thing that Aymeric has sought to hold onto as much as he can, even though a part of him fears that he has already lost himself and has begun to be unrecognizable as the man he was. Still, having a sense of manners is not limited only to humans, or so he tries to tell himself. ] I believe- There is a bond between us that is more than the bond that forms from... from that.

[ He says those words, unknowingly confirming what it is that Jonathan has suspected. But at the man's next words, he finds himself looking at him with surprise. ]

I know that you have quite the deductive mind, and that you are so very perceptive too, but I must ask: how did you know that? [ He is dimly aware of voidsent such as them having other gifts, but he has not pursued his own very much thus far. Perhaps Jonathan has delved deeper into that arena than he has, and that is what aids him in making those deductions. ]

Oh? It would certainly explain Ser Estinien's incapability of grasping the situation. He is quite convinced that she infected your mind to sneak her way into Ishgard's borders. Yet, he fails to realize how difficult it is to sway one of our nature. Regular magicks simply do not effect us.

[ A hint of a smile forms on his face. He raises one hand and simply gestures to the door that gives entrance to the study. Aymeric would be correct that Jonathan has developed those keener senses of his new nature. However, he is not all seeing or even psychic. He can merely tell by the heartbeat within the woman hiding behind the door listening in. She is healthy, by the sound of her heart. ]

It would be wise that you develop those higher instincts and trust them, Aymeric.

[ Lantaa, on the other hand, pulls back from her hiding place against the mostly closed door. A few steps are taken further back into the hallway as she nervously twists her fingers and presses her ears to her head. ]

Yes, and once he has set his mind upon something, it is quite difficult to change it again. I am under no illusions that anything I say will alter how he thinks. But I am quite confident that she has no interest in sneaking into Ishgard with the intent to cause anyone harm. If she wished to, she could have dispatched me quite some time ago.

[ He glances once more where Jonathan gestures, and he offers a half smile himself. ]

I must admit that I have been reluctant to do so, much as I have been reluctant to consume another's blood.

[ Doing so feels as though he is embracing the things he would just as soon reject, even if they are an irrevocable part of him now. ] Since you have guessed that someone is at the door, shall I invite her in?

She may be a bit hesitant to join us, however.

It will certainly be a sight to see if the man changes his mind on anything. [ Then, his head tilts at the rest of what Aymeric says. So, this woman of his is powerful? Perhaps his suspicions are not far from the mark after all. ] She must be rather fond of you as well.

[ He nods. ] Please, by all means, invite her in. If she lives here, then it her right to enter any room she would like.

Edited 2023-04-09 05:49 (UTC)

[ He does not mention the reason behind his belief that she could have put an end to him if she wished to. He was rather at her mercy for a time there, and she could have chosen not to heal him. ] She is, just as I am fond of her.

[ And that is putting it mildly. ] Very well, give me just a moment.

[ He stands up and moves to the door to open it. ]

Alkaid? Would you like to join us? [ If she says no, he has no intention of insisting. ]

[ Lantaa raises her gaze from the floor, fingers twisting, ears pressed to her head. Her tail curls along her legs as she glances at the room Aymeric came from, then back to him. ]

Is... is... [ she stops, attempting to gather her stammering voice. ] I didn't mean to intrude. He's a friend of yours, isn't he? I-I just wanted to know why you were up... I-I can leave you two here... and go back to bed.

[ By way of answer, he extends a hand to her and offers a smile. ]

Please, you would not be intruding. He would like to meet you.

[ His smile widens, and he hopes she feels reassured. ] He is an old friend, and I assure you, he is a good one. But if you would rather return to bed, I will not stop you.

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