synthneon | oceanview || ❝ made a promise i'm coming out alive. ❞

oceanview || ❝ made a promise i'm coming out alive. ❞

OCEANVIEW III

and now i'm wide awake.

Oh, I died like a million times.
Through the waves, I break
The nightmares finally over CODE BY TESSISAMESS

There's not much about the situation she likes. [ Steve points out.

The two members of the FBC quiet when Alan begins to explain what he knows. A nod from Steve to show he understands and that the pair of them will be fine. He's seen worse, even if Estevez seems to be putting everything on a scale of "bad" to "worse." This AWE has definitely been a shitshow, but, he'd say what happened at the Oldest House has been far worse. ]

See you later, Wake. On the flipside.

[ The statement once again implies the Ranger Captain knows more than he lets on. Then again, it seems everyone but Estevez is aware of what will happen next to some degree. Alan is going to square off with the Dark Presence once more without the help from the FBC. He'll find a way to bring Saga and Casey back. He may not call himself a hero, but maybe, he'll see it as taking responsibility.

Jesse runs her thumb over her keychain. She's pretty sure Alan lost his somewhere along the way. It's fine, really. Just a stupid idea she had about the two halves finding their way back to one another. If anything? now, they'd be Altered Items. Things that Emily would insist she keep locked up in the Oldest House for study. Something that Jesse frankly won't allow for long. It's hers... and probably the only thing she'll have from all this shit to prove any of it happened at all.

The manuscript page in her hand is going back with Alan.

That happened last time, didn't it? All the manuscript pages were taken with the Dark Presence back into the Lake and through the Threshold.

She simply glances to the side as she hears Alan approach. The keychain is slid back into her pocket. Elbows rest on her knees as she keeps her gaze focused on a spot in front of her. Blood has started to dry against the side of her head and in her hair. This is it. The moment that Alice had hinted at would need to happen. The reason why she and Polaris had been pulled into this story... to make sure he got on the path to get himself and everyone else out of it.

« The guiding star... the north star. » ]

You're going to need a way to get back to Bright Falls, you know.

Yeah, I know, and that's my fault. I'm an asshole, you know. [ Alan hates that he's been forced into this role, and that he's had to force others into roles too, when that's really not his place. If it was up to him, he'd burn this entire story and make it so no one was ever hurt by it, but it's not up to him.

He nods when Steve says his goodbye, treating it like something casual, as though they'll meet again at some point. They probably will, but Alan finds himself caught between wanting to believe he'll see them again and knowing that he won't. Not that he intends to say that out loud to anyone.

As he makes his way back over to meet with Jesse, a stray thought enters his mind: Didn't you have something that was yours? Yours, and hers, and it fit together somehow. What happened to that?

Maybe it existed and maybe it didn't, or maybe it just appeared and disappeared whenever it wanted, kind of like the Clicker. He wants to believe it existed, of course, but when he tries to think too much about it, it just seems to slip away from him. It's probably one more thing that contributes to his status as an asshole.

That thought lingers in his mind as he walks up to her. If this is the last time he sees her, he doesn't want to make this any worse than it already is. ]

Yeah, I know. That's not what I want to talk about, though. [ Well, he doesn't really know what he wants to talk about; anything but saying goodbye, probably. ]

[ The familiar sound of gunshots and Taken screaming echoes. That means Alan is on his way. Tightness takes her chest and Jesse frowns to try and suppress it. Being upset won't make any of this easier. She can be mad and hurt and whatever else afterwards. ]

What else is there to talk about?

[ They've talked endlessly through loops she's sure. What they could change, what they wanted to change, how they wanted this story to end. None of it amounted to actually changing any of it--except making sure Alan can change it. That Alan is freed from the Dark Presence and can write what he needs to bring all of this to an end.

He knows her well enough to see that she's trying to push down everything that this moment truly signifies. That she know she's going to drive off into the night and she'll most likely never see him again. Maybe he'll find a way to speak to her over the Hotline. Maybe they can find a way to slip notes back and forth underneath the door in the Oceanview Motel. That's not the same and never will be the same. ]

[ Once, Alan might have thought that walking off leaving gunshots and screams from Taken behind him would have been dramatic, maybe even cool. But now he's just tired of it all; he's tired of this story, of having to write the ending again and again until it worked. But this story is his fault, isn't it? It's his fault the story is even a story. Part of him thinks he lost the right to complain about it a long time ago.

So when he steps towards her, he does it quietly. At least I'm still me, for now. Hopefully I get to stay like that, but "hopefully" doesn't mean much of anything anymore.

He can instantly tell that it looks like she's bracing herself for something, something unpleasant or something she doesn't want to face. He can't really blame her for that. ]

Something. Maybe nothing. I just know I don't want to leave you like- like this.

[ But maybe that's what she wants. Maybe she wants him to just leave without dragging it out more.

In a strange way, it reminds him of how he left the first time, back in the Well-Lit Room, except that time, he was the one who wanted to go. He still has a reason for needing to go now, a purpose that means walking back into the Dark Place, but now... he has even more of a reason to want to stay here, and that makes him hesitate. ]

I guess if you want to yell at me, now's your chance.

[ Green eyes dart to look up at him then. It's not a pointed look, but a flat one. In what other state is there to leave her in? Happy and proud that he's going back and fixing the mess? She is, to some degree. She's proud he's managed to pull himself back from the brink enough to make the decisions on his own. That he could write the story to be at this point. That he's obviously free of the Dark Presence and can be Alan Wake again.

She just wishes she was there along side him to fix the rest of the mess.

« This is what heroes do, right? In stories. They have to make sacrifices to save the day. This is mine. Letting him go.

I hate it. » ]

What's the point in yelling about it? That doesn't change it. Nothing about any of what I do changes any of this. This is yours and Saga's story, Alan. You know that. I'm.. just the side character. Polaris is the on that points you in the way to go. That's how it has to go in order to get you where you need to go to end it. We both know that.

Sorry. All three of us know it.

That's- Damn it, that's not it. That's never been it.

[ Alan's tone is suddenly harder, more tense, almost like a rubber band about to snap. ]

You're not just a side character, not to me, and I don't give a damn about what the story says.

[ Unfortunately, what the story says is what they have to follow. ]

You know I'd take you with me if I could, or hell, I'd just stay right here. [ His hands clench into fists and a frustrated look takes his face. I hate this. She knows I hate this, doesn't she? ]

It's not fair. [ Nothing about any of this has been fair, but this feels even more unfair than everything that's happened before. ]

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oceanview || ❝ made a promise i'm coming out alive. ❞

OCEANVIEW III

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