oceanview || ❝ i must guide my love through the night. ❞

[outlierdirector]

OCEANVIEW II

into the dark, dark, dark.

I’m fighting to save my love somеhow
I cannot feel her by my side
Even in this placе inside my mind CODE BY TESSISAMESS

Comments

[crazywall]

I don't think so. But, you never know when you're... well, doing whatever it is I'm doing. Apparently. [ Tim gives an honest shrug. Different people, different lives, but they all look like him. They are him? It's confusing, but, he's trying to get to the bottom of it. Maybe he can one day and get Alan a better answer. ] I'm guessing your wall looks even more chaotic than mine. Given how long you've been here.

Thanks, Alan. I'll keep it in mind. [ A small smile finds it's way to his face. ] Let's keep that as a back up plan for now. Last possible option, you know?

[ His eyebrows raise slightly. "Because they were real people once." That's telling without really telling. His head tilts, a frown on his face. People who were real people once. It rings a bell somewhere in his head. Something familiar--phrased different, but, it reminds him of home. Bright Falls that is.

Huh.

Another note for the crazy wall. Once Alan leaves. ]

You know her?! [ Tim suddenly becomes the most animated he's been since Alan's met him. Remet him. He leaves from behind the television to stand beside the writer. ] Tell me what you know. Maybe it'll make sense of what's going on.

[ Though, he doesn't want to freak the man out. Alan's pretty jumpy most days. So, he lets out a breath and shakes his head. ] Sorry, let's answer your question first. I guess you forgot that detail. No worries, man.

Last time we met up in the Hotel you had a key on you. One that said something about an "Oceanview Motel and Casino"? Instead of the Hotel. The key opened a box that was in the Janitor's Office. Had all these documents with a seal you said was familiar. Yeah, I know that seal, by the way. The documents in there talked about something called a "Light Switch Cord", classified, redacted. That stuff. It mentioned referring to a "Dr. Darling presentation"?

Well, that's the same name of a guy I keep seeing on the T.V. He talks about parallel dimensions, many worlds, dream logic. He's somehow tied to the documents and the Hotel, I think. Which means he might be connected to the Motel too.

[ Tim pauses then. ] Alan. That seal on those documents, if you still have them? That's the Federal Bureau of Control. They showed up in Bright Falls in 2010, after you disappeared. They fenced off all of Cauldron Lake. General store, camping grounds, hiking trails. All of it. They've never left. Sometimes they have people come into town to fix equipment around the Lake. Asked for documents regarding certain--

[ CLICK.

Tim turns around the moment he hears the television click on. He feels his hopes rise for a second. Maybe the damn thing worked and he'll get answers he wants. Or, something like answers. Instead the screen flicks on and a title screen shows up. IN BETWEEN WITH MR. DOOR.

A musical beat.

Then, Mr. Door himself shows up. Chuckling, clapping, pointing at the camera.

Tim feels his heart sink and beat quicker. It looks exactly like the man from his dreams. Maybe with a little different with his glasses, but... ]

『 Haha, welcome back to the show, everyone! Oh, do we have a real special treat for you tonight. Of course, as always, the in house band--The Old Gods of Asgard! 』

[ The camera flicks over to the Old Gods of Asgard. One smiles, one does a quick rift on the guitar, the other taps a few drums. The crowd cheers before being quieted by the host. ]

『 Like I said though. We have a special guest tonight. It was very, very hard to line this guest up. Oh, the BOOKING it took! But, without further ado. Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome to the show, Ms. Jesse Faden! 』

[ Tim turns fully to the television then as Mr. Door walks a brilliant redheaded woman over to the stage. His eyes widen. His hand reaches out and grabs Alan's jacket. ]

Alan--that's her! The red headed woman I keep seeing. That's her! This is that talk show you mentioned, right?

[outlierdirector]

You should be doing more? [ « Really? Hasn't he done enough already? No one... no one else has done what he's done for me. Accepted me, and you, together. Believed what happened in Ordinary. He even brought us back into the story. What more could he do? » ] Alan... you've done more for me than most people ever have. Maybe even ever will.

[ « I have the feeling that it's not just nothing. »

She won't poke or prod, but, she'll suggest he get something for it. An ice pack--something. Once they've rested. Rest will help more than anything for the pair of them for the moment. She knows she's gone non-stop since they reached Bright Falls... and Alan probably hasn't had a real moment to just rest since he arrived from the Dark Place.

How did he get out?

Jesse falls in line with the kiss with a sense of ease and practice. Why shouldn't she? They've done it so many times already. The loop she can barely remember but knows exists... time in the Motel. Reality would say this should be their first time really together, but it's not true. Reality as people remember it tends to be not the most accurate thing as it is.

She has to break for air, but keeps her forehead to his and her lips close to his. If this is all they did for the rest of the afternoon? That would be fine with her. They haven't had the chance to reconnect on this level. Not just kissing and--other things--but as them. There's been moments, but the call to action interrupted both times the night before.

And he's been awake. Here. Home. ]

Thank you. [ She says it again, barely above a whisper, letting the sound move over him. He may not need to hear it once more. Still, she wants to make certain he understands how much it means to her. ] Welcome home, Alan.

[ She's welcomed him back already. The night before. Still, she wants to say it again now that it really is just the two of them. ]

[crazyisinevitable]

About that. [ It feels like an abrupt shift, but Alan feels something telling him he needs to say this to Tim- to his friend before he loses the chance. ] If you have the chance to get out, you take it. I'm serious, Tim.

[ I don't even want to THINK about what would happen if he spent as long as I have here, or if he went as deep as I've gone. This place will chew him up, carve him out, pull out EVERYTHING good. I won't let that happen. When I took that dive, I didn't have very much going for me that was good, except for Alice. But Tim- he has a lot going for him that's still good. He needs to keep that. He will keep that.

Alan looks at Tim with a determined expression on his face. It might look strange to the other man, as though it's just appeared out of nowhere, but Alan doesn't care. He makes a mental note to himself to try and find something, anything, that would help the good sheriff escape. It's a tall order, as Alan can't even escape himself, but it's still something that goes on his to-do list. ]

Backup plans are the way to go around here. Backup plans, notes to yourself, more notes to yourself. Believe it or not, there's no such thing as too many notes.

[ He's about to say something about the Taken, but Tim's exclaiming in surprise because of what Alan's just said about Jesse. ]

Well, there's kind of a lot about her that I know. Where should I start? [ But then the subject changes again and Tim's explaining and Alan's listening intently. If Tim's talking, that means it's important. And it's something he most likely forgot, so he needs to pay close attention. ]

Right... the key. I think I remember that. Or something about a key. You helped me find... something. The way to whatever I was looking for at the time. [ The Light Switch Cord. I know that's important. ]

Yeah... I think that rings a bell. Actually, I've heard that name from someone else too. [ Jesse. ]

Wait, you know about the FBC? That's- She works for them. Jesse Faden. Well, not just works, she's... she's the Director. [ Maybe he shouldn't be telling Tim this, because maybe that's considered classified information, but who exactly is Tim going to tell?

Alan's about to say more when he also hears the click of the television turning on. ] I guess you didn't need that man in after all-

[ Alan cuts himself off as the title screen flashes on, followed by a familiar musical beat, and then the appearance of a man that Alan knows. ]

Door?! What the hell?

[ The host continues, setting up his introduction for whoever the guest is, and then Alan's mind goes blank for a moment. nonono- not her. What the hell? This can't be happening. This can't be- Damn it, not her! I told her not to...

Alan stands there stunned even as Tim's hand reaches out and grabs hold of his jacket. ]

How the- How the hell did she get there? That's- the talk show, but-

[ No... ]

[crazyisinevitable]

[ It feels strange in a way, as Alan has been outside this reality for so long, but when Jesse echoes his question back to him, his own answer is immediate, as if he knows what to do instantly. As if he remembers the things that people need when they're under the weather. Or knocked down by a psychic attack. ]

Yes, yes, I should. I should be getting you something to eat. Something to drink. Meds, if you need them. A change of clothes, maybe? I should be doing more to help you with whatever you need right now.

[ If Alan weren't lying down beside her, he knows he'd be up pacing around the room trying to think about everything she might need that he should try and find and bring back for her. Except that would mean leaving her alone in the room... which is the exact opposite of what he's supposed to be doing.

Maybe he hasn't been running full-tilt without stopping in the same way that Jesse has, but he hasn't stopped to rest either. He tried, and didn't get very far, and the exhaustion is starting to catch up to him again, turning his thoughts manic and frazzled.

But she's kissing him back, and again, all the thoughts he's having fly out of his mind. All he knows is her, the feel of her lips on his, the way her breath feels on his face when she exhales... It feels natural, normal, familiar. By now, both of them should be well acquainted with the other, no road maps needed. He has to come up for air too, and while he catches his breath, he just leans his forehead in against hers in the way that they've done since the beginning of it all.

He's allowing his thoughts to wander to thoughts of the life he and Jesse could have, if everything fell into place for them. But as always, he focuses again the second she speaks.

Thank you.

The last time she thanked him, he spun out into a panicked state and her words were lost in his terror. This time, he hears them, and he feels that strong current of love for her rising. This time, the best way he can describe it is feeling the sound waves of her voice washing over him, bringing along her message of thanks.

This time, she welcomes him home once more, and this time, water forms in his eyes again. This time, he doesn't hide his face from her. This time, he smiles, and it's wide and warm and happy. ]

I love you, Jesse.

[ He's said it before, but he wants to say it again for the same reasons she had. ]

[outlierdirector]

I'm not sure what meds would even help with--this. [ A hand raises with a vague gesture to her head. Maybe if they were back in they would have something. Resources here in Bright Falls are limited, so all Jesse can think to do is rest. That may not even be enough. They won't really know until the sun goes down and they need to fight again. ] Food ... that's a good idea. For both of us.

[ « He pushes back against eating if I remember right. Sleeping, eating, normal things. He was asleep earlier though. Maybe this loop really is different. What if... if this is the last time around. »

So many things seem to be lining up for it. The FBC is in the right place at the right time. Somewhat equipped. Alan is awake. Anderson is present. Alan wrote them into the story again. It all seems to be there waiting to explode and become real--final. The end of this never ending loop. The end of a spiral.

Her gaze flickers down then back up as he speaks. Her eyes become wide by a small fraction at seeing the expression in them. Happy. Warm. Has she ever seen him look like this before? Maybe the two emotions separate, but never together. Whole. She blinks a few times before giving him a gentle smile of her own.

Jesse leans against him further, letting her eyes close. The feeling of his breath, the way his beard moves against her as he talks and shifts. It's familiar and known. There's no needing to guess or needing to relearn things about one another. They already know it and have known it--now the story isn't getting in the way and pulling that veil of forgetfulness over them. ]

We need to replace that flannel of yours. Imagine being in the Pacific Northwest and not having any. [ The smile on her lips tugs into something humorous before brushing her lips against his again. ] Maybe we can even enjoy Deerfest before we go back to New York.

[ That's a long shot of course. There's too many factors that need to line up for it, but, there is nothing wrong with hoping. Making a plan in case it somehow all does work out. It won't do any good for both of them to worry if it doesn't work out.

She kisses him again, lightly, almost teasing in a way. She'd rather be close to him again--make up for lost time. He said it had been a long while since they had seen each other last. Why not just spend a few hours together? ]

[crazywall]

Well, right back at you, Alan. No man left behind or something like that. You've been here longer than anyone has the right to be. If I'm finding a way out? Well, it better be a way that both of us can hitch a ride on. I wouldn't be a very good Sheriff of Bright Falls if I left a temporary resident behind.

[ Or, something like that. ]

Notes and backup plans. Got it. I'll keep it in mind.

[ Tim is listening intently even if it doesn't sound like it. The red headed woman is the leader of the FBC? Then why is he seeing her? It sounds like Alan has more of a connection to her than he would. There's a look of confusion on his face before he looks back at the whiteboard.

Alan mentioned something about a hedron and polaris? Like, the star? Where does that tie in? And, that key and documents. Sounds like it's things to remind him about. Maybe they're shuffled away inside that bag of his. Tim is about to suggest that until the events unfold.

His hand is still gripped tightly onto Alan's jacket. He meant to grab the arm, but, sort of missed along the way. The reaction of the writer confirms its the Door that Alan knows. He still doesn't match up to what Tim knows, but, it's the best lead he has so far. ]

『 Sorry, why am I here?

Oh, that's right! We wanted to keep it a surprise when we reached out to you! I wanted to get both of you on the show at the same time, but, you know how it is trying to contact celebrities when they're doing promotional tours. 』

[ He turns his attention briefly back to Alan. "A promotional tour" isn't what he'd call whatever the hell is going on with Alan. He doesn't even know what it really is, but it's definitely not that.

"Mysterious woman", "new muse", "in a relationship with Alan Wake. An intimate one."

So why the hell has he been seeing this woman and various versions of her if she's tied to Alan Wake? That's... weird. Weirder than this place gets. Yeah, hopefully Alan won't take any of that in a weird or bad way. Hopefully.

The interview continues on, and as it goes on, Tim finds his attention locked more on Alan than the woman on the screen. She's guarded, even when Door tries to bait answers out. Cautious. Smart woman, given everything going on. It makes him wonder how any of what Door implies is true. It seems polar opposite of Alan--but maybe opposites attract or something like that. ]

『 But, more on that in a few minutes! Don't touch that dial. We'll be right back with more of our exclusive interview here, on In Between with Mr. Door! 』

[ The television clicks onto a slide waiting for commercials before static comes in. Tim debates moving his arm from Alan's jacket, but, something in him tells him the man needs to be grounded or he'll fly off the handle. Alan Wake did have a temper from what Tim can recall of the stories back from 2010. He's not sure he'd want to see what that temper would do here in the Nightmare Place. ]

She's got the same name as the woman you said. You're sure that's her? Absolutely sure. One hundred percent positive? She should be back in reality then, not here on... whatever the hell that was. Unless, I don't know, it's some crazy dream she's sharing with us.

[crazyisinevitable]

[ Alan shakes his head at that. It feels impossible, even if stating that word around here is a bad idea. ] Well, hopefully whatever it is has a really big hitch. [ Because he knows he's gone pretty deep into the Dark Place, and getting him out isn't going to be that easy or done without a fight.

But the conversation they've been having fades out of Alan's mind for the time being when he sees what's happening on the television screen. He doesn't pull away from Tim, mainly because it feels as though his feet have become glued to the floor. He's riveted in place, watching Door's talk show unfold with intense focus.

When the camera pans over to Jesse again, he reaches out with one hand, fingers outstretched like he wants to touch the image on the screen. It isn't her, because he refuses to believe it, but he can't stop himself from reaching out, any more than he can stop himself from missing her. I miss her. I miss her so much.

As Alan watches, thoughts, or rather commentary, on what he's hearing Door say enter and exit his mind.

Mysterious woman? I mean, I guess, if you don't know her. Tortured author? Maybe, but if everything would just leave me alone for five seconds, maybe I wouldn't be.

The more Alan sees, the more his expression changes. Tension becomes clear in his posture and in his face, and a vein on his neck starts to pop out, betraying his rising agitation. It's obvious that Door is fishing for answers, or maybe he's just having a laugh while knowing the answers all along (he does have that annoying quality about him) but what's less obvious to Alan is if this is real or not. Jesse promised she wouldn't go into the lake, and Alan believes her, which means this just has to be one giant mindscrew.

Believing that it's real is so far off the table, and Alan would break the table just to be careful.

The interview turns to the subject of Initiation and Return, and Alan's agitation seems to only grow. ]

What the hell is this? I thought it was bad enough that I was listening to Door talk about a book I never wrote about a fictional author named Alan Wake and- shit.

[ The interview continues for a few more minutes before Door calls a break, and the show goes to a commercial break. Finally, after a moment of staring at where Jesse's image was, Alan turns his gaze back to Tim. ]

I know it's her. I'd- I'd recognize her anywhere. [ His eyes search Tim's, as if searching for answers that the other man probably doesn't have. ] That's not real, right? It can't be real.

[ He latches onto Tim's supposition like a drowning man latches onto a rope or life preserver. ]

It has to be a dream state. I've been in one of hers before. Maybe this is something else from one of her dreams.

[ But what the hell does it mean? ]

[crazyisinevitable]

[ Alan looks at her with a surveying, considering look before he responds. ] I know that. I do, I just- A part of me is saying I need to act, I need to do something that isn't just lying here next to you. [ And then his expression turns wry, and he adds: ] Another part of me is just too damn tired to get out of this bed again, at least for a little while.

[ I can't remember the last time I slept. The couch in the sheriff's office doesn't count. ]

I'm guessing this place isn't that big on takeout options. I don't remember the last time I got takeout either, or even thought about eating, really. [ I think she tried getting me to, but I just couldn't do it. I still don't know if I can.

Alan feels his hopes starting to rise, as he starts to wonder if maybe this is it: the final turn in the loop, or whatever it is. The pieces seem to be falling into place, lining up for the finish. But he feels a frown trying to form, and he covers it up by smiling wider. She can't know that he's thinking it's too good to be true. But it has to be. After all these years, it can't be this easy. The pieces are lining up too easily for Alan's liking.

I get the feeling that the rug's going to be yanked out from under me when I'm least expecting it. When we're least expecting it. And it's going to be ugly.

Screw it. If an ugly end is coming, I'm taking this chance to make something not ugly. Not terrible. Us. Together. Nothing's taking this away from us. ]

If we do, I'm getting you one too. Not just because we'd match, and you can tell me that's a stupid idea, but- flannel's comfortable. I don't have a problem admitting that. [ And I only have good memories associated with it. Maybe we can make some new memories together. ]

An actual, normal Deerfest. Now that would be something.

[ He waits for her to come back up for air, giving her a moment to catch her breath, and then he goes right back in for another kiss: soft at first but deepening the longer he keeps his mouth on hers. If time together is what she wants, he's more than happy to give it. ]

[outlierdirector]

[ She nods as best she can. The motion makes her head swim and a dull ache form. The brief discomfort that forms on her face before she decides to rest against the pillows again. ] Then, we stay in bed a few hours. We'll sort the rest out later.

[ Ultimately, she isn't sure what their next move in terms of recovery should be. She's not used to down time in the middle of everything. She imagines the field agents will send someone, have her be checked up on, offer updates. Once they get to that point she'll have an idea of what to do. Other than that... all she can really think to do is. Time for them. ]

I bought one. Red and black. [ Jesse's expression almost looks playful. Hadn't she worn it in one loop? Maybe. They all blur to a weird dream of images that seem to never end. ] Not exactly matching, but, close enough. Once we replace yours.

It would be something. I've never been to something like it.

[ Part of her worries he doesn't want the time the way she does. In that sense that perhaps he's just going with the flow, and she's distracting from sleep or his need to take care of her. Once it's clear he wants to stop or no longer interested? She'll stop. The last thing she wants to do is make the wrong move and push him away. Especially not now, not with how long it's taken them to come back to this point.

She moves to her back, gently guiding him to join her. She doesn't mind if he's above her, needing to lean on her as well. Her side isn't damaged. It's just her head that comes and goes in terms of feeling heavy or not. Heavy, drifting, floating. Sometimes it feels like mud, and sometimes it feels like she can't focus. Well, can't focus on anything other than his mouth on hers.

There's a tinge of hunger she can't keep from any of her kisses. That ever present need to touch him or be close. Maybe once they're finally able to be together that will lessen. For now, however, both her hands move to curl into his hair at the back of his head. It's soft. Usually it's dirty or wet due to whatever the hell is going on. Now, though... now it's how it should be. Soft, clean, and maybe still needing to be a little shorter. ]

[crazywall]

A book you never wrote?

[ Tim is quiet most of the interview--well part of the interview anyways. There's not much commentary at all, save for his question to what Alan has said. He knew that Alan was writing to get out of the Dark Place. Just as he's been trying to find Door to get out. That is where the shared notes come in.

So, Door thinks Alan wrote a book. Probably this "Initation" or "Return" that he mentioned. Alan either never did or has no memory of it. Door's pulled the red headed woman--Jesse Faden--in on whatever the hell is going on. Tim would wonder if it is to torture him, but, he can see the way Alan is reacting. Tension, veins swelling, looking like he wants to punch something.

That raised hand towards the television also didn't escape his notice. Alan cares about this woman--a lot. ]

I'd say the possibility of it being real is as real as anything else in this place. [ He knows it's not the answer Alan will want. Still, he can't bring himself to lie to the man. They're friends, right? ] Or... maybe she's been pulled in here by her dreams? If this is the place I've gone during mine? She'd be able to wake up just fine.

We'd need to get to her to see. [ An idea to test the waters. Though, he imagines Alan is going to jump at the opportunity. ] I'll go with you as back up. Given how agitated the locals are? You might need the extra firepower.

Assuming we're going to find out what's going on, anyways. We could stay here.

— special guest ii.

[outlierdirector]

[ The stage grows dark during the "commercial break", but she can tell it's anything but a break. The attitude in the whole room shifts. The Old Gods of Asgard disappear and a heaviness hangs. She knows this heaviness. It is the same kind that always followed Hartman--that is soaked into the ground of Bright Falls.

« This--this can't be. Behind the Spiral Door? The Dark Place? »

The host shrouded in the lack of light sighs. He sits behind the desk and sighs, removing his glasses. She can see his silhouette move and place them on the desk. Then, he turns in the seat and stands up. He tugs at the suit and crosses over to stand in front of her. Jesse immediately stands as well. She won't let this person--thing--intimidate her. ]

I had forgotten how stubborn you Fadens are. [ The host sighs and shakes his head slightly. ] Fighting against a current that is trying to help you. Although, I will admit, you are far more amicable than your brother, Miss Faden.

[ « Dylan? He knows Dylan? Wait... wait, Dylan said something about a Door once. He wanted to go to other worlds, learn how to travel, to bring the Hiss there. This "Door" refused to help him. Is this really that same guy? Why would he be behind the Spiral Door? » ]

And you're insistent connection to that resonance. Some things can't be helped, nor stopped, I suppose. Even when you're a dimension away from home. Hm. [ He glances upwards, squares his shoulders, and stares her down. ] I'll be frank, Miss Faden, as you've done nothing to get in my way. If anything? You're one of the few people that play their part to its full capacity and domain. This is a farce, as I am sure you can tell. All of it is. A way to help your wayward writer--Alan Wake.

[ « That must mean Alan is here. He's really here? Where? Maybe if we can leave through the Spiral Door-- » ]

Now, I wouldn't get too excited, Miss Faden. Alan is trapped here as much as any other unfortunate soul that crosses over. He insists on opening doors that shouldn't be opening, peeking in, trying to force things to work. I'm only involved because he dragged someone I care about into this mess of a story of his. But... he is a very stubborn man, as I'm sure you're aware of. Which is why I've brought you here for this short amount of time.

You really think Alan is going to listen to me? [ Jesse raises her eyebrows. ] He might, but in the end? Alan does what he wants to do. What he feels he needs to do. I can't control him--

--No, Miss Faden, you can't. You can barely control yourself and your Bureau. What I need you to do, instead, is play your part as you have been. This endless looping of his will destroy everything in its path. Himself and you included. Play along, do what you're called to do, and maybe he will come to understand what it is he needs to do. You've been doing it so far, but, things are becoming dire.

[ Jesse's expression falls for the first time in this whole conversation. She can tell they are. The story is getting darker every time, the false endings getting more drastic. Alan's losing his way in trying to get the story to do what he wants and get the ending he needs. There's an immediate reaction inside her--he can't take them out. He promised. ]

He needs to finish this futile story of his. Put it to rest. Move on. Stop chasing ghosts in his own head.

I'm not going to give up on him. I'm not going to tell him to stop going after what it is he wants. You can tell me to play my part all you want, Door, but I'm not going to have him give up to the whims of whatever the hell it is that's going on here.

[ Door sighs and shakes his head with a smirk. ] I expected no other answer from you. You are the way you are and that is why that resonance chose you. So, Miss Faden, let's try another way. Play along with this and whatever else I call on you to do. Maybe we'll find a way to get your writer out of his spiral yet.

[ The lights flicker and come back on. The Old Gods of Asgard return, playing the rift they had before. Jesse finds herself sitting back down on the couch, and Mr. Door back at the desk with his glasses on. All smiles and pretend the conversation hadn't happened.

« We don't have a choice other than to play along for now. I don't know the way out, and you still feel far away. » ]

Ha, welcome back, folks! I hope that commercial break didn't cause you to get up from your seats and run into the dark of night! Nothing good ever comes from it. We left of with our special guest for the night--the mysterious and controlled Miss Jesse Faden!

[ Jesse squares her shoulders before looking out at the "crowd." Fake smiles. She can play along. She's good at faking into situations around her. ]

Now, we left off on a bit of a cliffhanger there, Jesse. I had asked if you knew anything about Alan Wake's mysterious books--Initiation and Return! Initiation, as I said, is hitting shelves tomorrow. We had Alan on the show last night, and MAN, was he dedicated to the role! Overlapping realities, pretending he had no idea what he had written, acting as if he'd forgotten the whole thing. Pretty impressive.

[ « Did he actually forget that he wrote a manuscript outside of the one that's causing the AWE in Bright Falls? We've done so many loops that maybe he has. » ]

... well, he wouldn't be the best selling author that he is if he couldn't sell the idea in his books. [ She feels herself cringe on the inside at the thought of going along with this. ] You asked earlier if I knew anything about the stories, right? Well, I don't. He keeps it pretty close.

Are you sure about that? I mean, I have heard that you're his new muse. Surely he'd share something with you about it. Something that maybe he'd forgotten in one draft and you reminded him of?

[ « Fuck no, I'm not saying anything about that. » ] Sure, I mean, sometimes things don't fit in, right? They end up on the cutting room floor. Movies, books, t.v. shows... all that sort of thing. Look, Mr. Door, I don't know anything about an "Initiation" novel. Sorry to bring the mood down.

[ Mr. Door leans back in his chair and nods along. ] So, then, it must be "Return" you know something about! Maybe a sneak peek at what it is that we can expect?

[ « He said all of this is to help Alan, right? He's trying to get Alan to realize something. Maybe we should use it. I don't know if those notes I've sent are getting through. You hardly get through here anymore... » ]

What I can say is that it takes place back in Bright Falls. Like Departure did. [ She leans forward slightly, staring the man down evenly. ] Government agencies get involved. The doppleganger is back. There's a struggle between light and dark--

[ Jesse finds herself cut off as the band begins to play another rift of a song she doesn't know. The singer with the eyepatch smiles at her, nodding, as if he's onto something. ]

AH! "Balance Slays the Demon." A classic! Man, I missed your songs. [ Mr. Door chuckles and points straight at the band. ] And that's our queue. Hang tight folks, we'll be back with more of our exclusive interview right after this!

[ The lights shut off except for the overhead analog writing: COMMERCIAL BREAK. ]

[crazyisinevitable]

[ He nods too, but his attention zeroes in on her almost immediately. She's always hidden what she's thinking or feeling behind an inscrutable expression, but sometimes Alan feels as though he sees things slip through. Maybe it's because he believes he knows what to look for, or maybe he's just fooling himself, but he thinks he sees a hint of discomfort in her eyes as she nods.

Alan makes a mental note to himself then, because he'd be lying if he said he isn't worried about Jesse. Make sure she doesn't move too much, or push herself too hard. I don't know exactly what kind of damage a psychic event like that does, but I can imagine it's not good. I can shrug off a bruise. What she's dealing with shouldn't be shrugged off. I get the feeling that Estevez wouldn't be the only one ticked off if something happened to her on my watch.

He pulls himself back to the present and to Jesse, and his eyebrows lift in surprise. ] You did? Red and black, huh? Are those your favorite colors?

[ Another layer of the Jesse onion. Maybe one day I'll peel all of them back. Or not. Everyone should have their secrets, things they won't tell anyone else. I don't need to know everything there is about her. It's enough that she's letting me in. ]

It would be something. I've never been to it either. [ Not the real Deerfest, anyway. Alan doesn't consider anything with flying deer heads a good experience.

He wants all the time that they can manage to have, which he knows isn't going to be very much. So he intends to be grateful for what they have, instead of wishing for more, when that's not possible.

When she moves to her back, he watches her closely, moving with her almost automatically when he feels her guiding him down to follow her. The only problem is trying to find a comfortable position that agitates his side less, but even if he never manages to find one, Alan's not really worried about that. Even a little discomfort is worth being able to be with her like this, especially since the next time they have this chance, he might not be himself. He might not be awake. I might not even remember.

But now he's awake, and he remembers, and there's just as much hunger in his kisses and the speed with which he gives them as there is in hers. He leans in, being careful not to lean on her too much, but the feel of her hand at the back of his head, curling into his hair, is more soothing than any ice pack could ever be.

His hand slides around her back, curling around her hip, while his other hand twines itself in her hair too, as he presses another kiss against her mouth. ]

[crazyisinevitable]

I mean, the manuscript exists. I've seen it. Held it. [ Scratched the hell out of it. It needed to be changed. ] But Door had a real book, with a cover and everything. I just figured it's the Dark Place screwing with me as usual: let's show the author his own finished book that he doesn't remember ever finishing!

[ Alan's disgust with the whole thing is clear, and he's not even trying to hide it. Jesse being on Door's show is just more salt being poured into an open wound, whether it's real or not. And of course, Alan has to admit that there's a distinct possibility that it's real. The definition of "real" shifts and changes by the minute, even down to the second, but it still exists. It's not the answer he wants, but he can't pretend it doesn't exist either.

If things like Taken that roam around barking out his name or whispering it other times are real, then this can be real too. ]

Either way, whether it's real or not, or if she's just been pulled in while dreaming, it's not good. I don't- I don't want her getting too close. I don't want this place reaching out and seeping into her mind, and-

[ He cuts himself off, because even the imagined thought of what might happen if Jesse gets touched by the Dark Presence, even if it's only in her dreams, is not something he wants to think about. The Dark Presence can get in everywhere, so why not in dreams too? ]

Yeah, we need to get- Wait. [ He glances back at Tim questioningly. ] If you come with me, that's me taking you away from this. [ His crazy wall. ]

I think you working things out here is more important than me trying to get to wherever Door is. [ He knows where Door should be, but will he be able to get there? ] This could be just another wild goose chase set up by the Dark Place.

[ He knows he's going, goose chase or not. But if Tim wants to back out and stay here, he gets it. ]

— meeting.

[outlierdirector]

[ All she wants to do is sleep.

It's taken so long to get where she's at. Which, to some, a random bed in some random motel in a backwater town in Washington isn't much. It would of been some inconsequential thing if not for the man she's sharing the room with. That makes it everything in that moment. The last time they had done this feels so long ago that it may has well been in another lifetime. And, some researchers in the Bureau might call it that with the various levels of altered reality they've all slipped through.

She's dimly aware of the arms around her as the gentle familiar tug comes to her mind. Jesse rolls more into the pair of arms holding her. Maybe it's a childish notion, but, she might also be owed something like that. She wants just this one thing without needing to jump to action as soon as some paranormal entity calls. Unfortunately, that paranormal entity happens to be the one she plays host of resonance to. Ignoring her is pretty impossible.

« ...what? Talk to Anderson? Why? I'm here, with Alan. Whatever it is can wait a few hours, can't it? How many ever hours we have until nightfall. Just let me have this time for myself. Please? »

Polaris shifts. Insistent. Time isn't on their side and the story is growing to its next story beat.

Jesse turns further into Alan's hold, as if he'd be able to keep everything out. Of course, he can't, but this one time she wishes she wasn't a hotline for paranormal voices that want attention.

« Fine. How am I supposed to talk to her? I'm not leaving... and you didn't like her inside my head the first time. Not that I enjoyed the idea either. You're sure the Board won't get upset? ...alright. Do whatever it is you need to. »

Polaris' resonance beats through the Sheriff's Station, amplified by the agents wearing the HRAs. Most people would never pick it up, but those that have unique abilities can. A gentle hum that beats like a steady heartbeat. One that can reach out to any needed. Those with unique abilities can sense words sometimes, otherwise it feels like an idea that has suddenly come to them. Maybe even to others it may come as a flash to an image.

That is how Polaris reaches out to the FBI Agent Saga Anderson. A gentle flash of an image of a woman with brilliant red hair, and the inclination to reach out to her again. Gently this time. No intentions of shoving her way in.

Jesse opens her eyes to find herself in the field office of the FBI in the Elderwood Lodge. She glances side to side, turning slightly to note the ordered papers on the wall.

« Huh. I have to admit, it's not quite what I expected. I thought it might be something like when someone uses the Hotline. »

She picks up on the shift in the room. Fair enough, given this isn't Jesse's own mind. Her gaze moves to across the table to find one Saga Anderson. She sets her jaw and lifts her chin slightly. Guarded. She can't help it, even in a mental projection. She hates being profiled, being examined.

« Maybe we can make this more like a conversation than anything else. »

Her hands at her sides raise slightly as if to say tah-dah! Her hair is down, and this time, dressed as the Director of the Federal Bureau of Control. That is who Saga tried to poke after all. ]

Anderson, right? [ Her tone suggests everything about this is very normal for her. It's a little unusual, even for Jesse, but psychic conversations aren't necessarily weird. ] You wanted to talk earlier. So, here I am.

[outlierdirector]

[ Psychic injuries like this are definitely a first for her. She's been on the brunt end of objects thrown, cement thrown, pieces of ...whatever the Astral Plane is made of. Polaris has never directly injured her, so, she can't say she knows the right way to proceed. Laying down and trying to keep things somewhat steady in her movements seems to be the best idea. She can already hear Emily freaking out but also wanting to study the damage.

Another smile is his reward for the question. ] Not... exactly. I just thought it'd match, y'know. [ A hand raises to gesture to the red hair. ] I usually wear blacks and blues.

Oh. [ A look of understanding crosses her face then. Right. The AWE in 2010 happened right before Deerfest--just like this one. Her lips press together for a brief moment before she nods again. The look of discomfort crosses her eyes briefly. ] Then, we'll definitely need to stay here a few more days. A good welcome home memory, right?

[ Her gaze flicks down to his side, trying to adjust in a way that might help with his injury. Medical professionals would say that this might not the best activity, but Jesse could really care less. The exhaustion will most likely catch up to them before their injuries anyways. As much as she hates to think it.

You can let go.

She can't pin the exact moment he said that to her. But, it's definitely Alan's voice, and not just a memory wearing his voice. Something he told her in that way he asks for her to trust him. It still takes a moment for her to convince herself to lower that wall, and that's hardly his fault. At least she can lower the wall now. There was a time she was unable to do that.

Her hands move from his hair to his shoulders so she can wrap her arms around him as she finally does let go of that control. The motions are still not as quick as she'd like due to the insistent pounding in her head, but, she deepens the kiss. Hopefully he won't pull or shy away from her now. ]

[crazywall]

Well, it's one good mind screw if it is Dark Place doing it. [ Tim shrugs. There's probably more to it. Things are never that simple in this place. ] Where's the manuscript now?

[ Maybe that's how Door got a hold of it to turn it into a ... book or whatever. Maybe if they can get their hands on that manuscript that'll give them leverage for whatever Alan is actually trying to get done. They've never really shared that information. It might be time to do that now. ]

Then we make sure she's not really here. Easy clean and sweep. Hopefully, if the place isn't overrun by the locals.

[ Given he's never been to wherever this show is being broadcasted from. Alan would know, given he's been on it. He's never been able to find it though.

At the motionless gesture of the crazy wall, Tim glances back over it. A sigh comes from him, nodding, before turning his attention back to Alan. He already made up his mind, but he's reinforced it now. ]

I think the only answers I might get is if I tag along--if you don't mind. Your reasons are the main priority. But, if I can learn something to help with this? All the better. [ He grabs his sheriff hat--because why not have it if this is a damn dream world--a flashlight and ammo for his gun. He opens a drawer and tosses Alan an extra flare gun. ] Door brought me here, remember? That means he's holding cards I need.

Like I said though. Your stuff first. Talkshow, Jesse, your apparent manuscripts.

[ He pauses and offers a smirk. ] Or, you could look at it this way: I'm helping out a member of the Bright Falls community that went missing. Even if he was only there temporarily.

Now, I can't find wherever Door does this from. I've tried. So, you're leading the way. I'll watch your back.

[wontbeperfect]

[ Two very different scenes are playing themselves out at the same time. In one scene, Alan's asleep with his arms around Jesse. He doesn't look peaceful, exactly, but he does look more relaxed than he has in a very long time.

In the other scene, Saga Anderson is pacing around lost in thought, or so it appears. She needs something, needs to talk to a specific person. Not just to get information, but to... apologize? Somewhat, anyway. The first time she tried speaking to this person, nothing went the way it should have, and it ended with her being forcibly dragged from the room.

But this time, it's not her doing the reaching. Or the breaking in. Not that the sensation in her mind feels like a break in. It's more like a nudge.

Alan, however, senses a shift. Maybe not from Jesse herself, but from Polaris. Or maybe it's just him reacting to Jesse shifting positions in her sleep and not wanting her to leave the bed or him just yet, even if his sleeping mind has no awareness of what time it is. His arms curl a little tighter around her, not enough to restrict movement, but just enough to hint at an unwillingness to let her go.

But when she stills, he does too, as if he only relaxes when he feels her do the same. Of course, the opposite is true, but as long as she's relatively still, it doesn't take much for Alan to sink deeper into sleep.

Saga's pacing continues, but it's not in the cell she was put in. Thank goodness for that. Even if I'm not really out of there, those brothers were really starting to get to me.

She looks up when she sees Jesse walking towards her, and she can't quite help the feeling of vague respect that rises up when she sees her. There's something about the way she carries herself, the energy that she gives off. It's pulled Saga's focus, at least. Maybe she really did go about this the wrong way. But maybe it's not too late to extend an olive branch. ]

Yeah. [ This is a little awkward. But it's awkward because of me, so I need to fix it now. ] Yeah, I wanted to talk. But first-

[ What do they call that? Humble pie? Yeah. That's it. I can admit when I've screwed something up, and Sevastopol made it pretty clear I screwed a few things up. ]

First things first. I owe you an apology, so... I'm sorry, Director.

[outlierdirector]

[ Jesse stills as her mind reaches out to Saga--or maybe her mind is reached out to. She still reacts as Alan's arms tighten around her, leaning into his hold. Her breathing evens as at least her body calms back down into sleep. Her head still pounds, but, it's only something she's distantly aware of inside the field office in Saga's mind.

She isn't one to go poking around in someone else's head. If only because she wouldn't appreciate it being done to her. Still, she notes the various things Saga has taken notes of. The fact the desk in front of Saga is covered in pictures of faces--hers on one of them. ]

Jesse is fine. I don't really do formalities. [ She gives a little bit of a smile. People still call her "Faden", and she has the feeling Saga would fall into that camp. ] And, apology accepted.

[ Jesse glances to the side quickly. Polaris shifts, but, is relatively silent. Maybe because she doesn't want to tip the other woman off just yet. Fine by her. ]

These... abilities we have. They're not really mapped out or have handguides to them. So, just, be a bit more cautious, I guess? [ « Very directorial of you, Jesse. Smooth. Arish and Steve would never let it down if they heard that. » ] I'm sure it's obvious that I don't like people poking around in my head--even without my own abilities. So, we'll just call it a misunderstanding and move on.

[ She rolls her shoulder a bit before gesturing to the side. ] I can't garauntee I can answer every question you might have. But, I'll give you what information I can.

So... fire away.

[ « We don't have the time to be enemies. So, as open as we can be. » ]

[crazyisinevitable]

[ Maybe that's half of Alan's issue with this whole thing. He can fight off Taken, and he can write things to fix other things that he may or may not have made happen himself, but he can't fix or heal the lingering damage that Jesse's still dealing with. What good am I if I can't do that? Am I even helping her at all? ]

I bet it looks good on you. [ He smiles at her in return as his gaze travels briefly to admire her red hair. ] I bet most things look good on you.

[ He allows himself another minute or two of just looking at her, taking her in and trying to memorize all the details he sees. Maybe it won't do any good, with how easily his memories get pulled from him, but he does it anyway. ]

Do you think you can do that? [ Can I do that? Will the story let me? ] That would be a great welcome home memory. But as far as memories go? This one is already great.

[ He's awake, and she's with him. Kissing him. Touching him. He feels safe, even if safety is never a guarantee. It's more of an illusion, in his mind. But right here in this moment, he feels like it's real.

Even if all she's doing is touching his hair, and then his shoulders as she wraps her arms around him, he can't stop the low contented moan that escapes him and the breathless way he whispers her name against her lips. She draws reactions from him that he'd forgotten he knew he was capable of, and he's not complaining about it one bit.

I wish that this could just be forever, instead of something temporary. I don't want this to end.

But Alan can't shake the feeling that this will end, sooner or later, and all the wishing in the world won't keep that from happening. It makes him want to hold onto her tighter, kiss her deeper, and not let her go for anything in the world. ]

[outlierdirector]

[ She would argue he is doing her plenty of good. Healing psychic trauma may be nothing more than rest and relaxation. Something they definitely don't have much of at the moment. The thought had crossed her mind that maybe the injury was the price paid for changing the story--saving her, Saga, and putting them back in. If so? She'll pay the price. Saga is a key component somehow, and well, she will fight tooth and nail to keep Alan. ]

Just good on me? [ She gives a smirk, but, doesn't expect much playback from it. ] I usually don't wear dresses. There's never been a real good time to wear one, and, the job isn't really dress friendly. Unless I decide to be a desk Director.

[ « Which, fat chance on that. I can't ask people to go into danger if I'm not willing to do it. That's not the kind of leader I want to be. » ]

Once we end this AWE? Yeah, I think we can. There's going to be interviews and paperwork and... whatever else Kiran needs. Maybe I'll mandate everyone take a breather and enjoy Deerfest. Writer parautalitarians included. Director's orders.

[ The breathless way her name comes from him is enough to send one shiver up her spine, but the gentle moan from him makes her inhale sharply. Not controlled, no walls. Just excitement. The fact she could do this for another person when she's very bad at people.

Well, any people that apparently aren't Alan Wake.

She can feel that familiar sense of wanting to grow louder inside her. Amplify. It's a part of her, as much as she'd want to hide it. It's embarrassing because it's not normal. That connection with Polaris--that need to amplify--is what drives it. It's otherworldly and she's not sure Alan is willingly to put up with it every time they get... like this.

Her lips brush along his as she mouths his name. Fingers press into his shoulders and she shifts against him. Probably not the best thing to do while injured, but, she's let herself go for the moment. ]

[crazyisinevitable]

[ That earns him a look. ] You think it's something else? Something more? [ What more is there? Does Tim know more than he's saying? Alan's brow furrows in thought as he tries to puzzle yet another thing out. ]

Well, I thought I had it, in the room where I do all the writing. [ Or someone writes. Sometimes it's me. Sometimes it's... ]

Maybe there's multiple copies. Maybe the Dark Place needed copies, so there just were copies. Or every time I make a draft and something doesn't work, that just gets grabbed up by the Dark Place. [ He shakes his head. He doesn't really know how that makes sense, or how Door would get his hands on them if that happened to be the case. ]

You know, if things were different, I'd get you the biggest case of donuts that I could find. You do like donuts, right? Or, just replace donuts with something you really like.

[ He owes Tim a lot already, and the unfortunate thing is, he doesn't know how he'll ever be able to repay him. ]

If it is, I know how to deal with them. Kind of. [ Sometimes luck isn't on his side when dealing with them, but maybe it'll go better with Tim backing him up. ] Do you have a flashlight?

[ He offers the other man a smile as he watches him grab his hat, flashlight, and ammunition. That answers that question. His smile is a small one, and grimmer than he'd like, but there's not much to smile about around here. ]

Maybe if things had been different, I'd actually live there. [ It's hard to really envision it, but maybe in time, Alan would have grown to like life in Bright Falls. ]

Just stay close, alright? [ He catches the flare gun, and it and his flashlight slip into his hands with almost practiced ease as he gives Tim a looking over to reassure himself that he's ready. Well, as ready as anyone can be, anyway. ]

I don't mind at all. It's a nice change, having someone around for company.

[crazyisinevitable]

[ Too many people along the way have paid prices of varying levels, and the last thing Alan wants is for Jesse to have to pay more than she already has, because of him. He knows that if he thinks about this for too long, he'll start to spiral, and the waves will come back in, and that's the last thing he wants. But from his perspective, all he can see is the trouble he's caused, and that he continues to cause.

Will this ever stop? Will I find a way to either end this, or to do it on my own so that no one else gets hurt? ]

On you, off you... You'd look good either way. [ He tries to smirk, but it falls a bit flat given the worries lurking in the back of his mind. ]

You're confident that we can end this. [ That I can end this. I know that I did it once, but that was different. That didn't take me thirteen years. ] But even if it doesn't happen as soon as I'd like, I would like to enjoy Deerfest. With you, and with everyone else. But mostly you.

[ He shivers too, in spite of himself, and as he shifts to move against her too, wanting nothing to be between them, his side protests, but he resolutely ignores it. He might have gotten knocked around by the Taken, but nothing is going to stop him from having this moment with Jesse.

With the hand that's resting against her hip, fingers ghost against what they can reach of the skin there, tracing against it in small patterns. In the places where her fingers touch, pressing into his shoulders, little sparks like fireworks seem to go off beneath his skin.

The Taken might come once nightfall arrives again, but as long as it is still light out, all Alan wants is these moments between them to get to know each other, fully and completely. And what better way to do that than to touch each other, explore what they can reach of each other's bodies, to know the other both inside and out?

In a lot of ways, they have the "inside" part covered. They explored the outside too, once, in a loop... maybe more than once. But for Alan, the difference now is that this time, he's awake. The waves are staying back, and he can remember. The nightmares have tried taking him over, and they'll try to do it again, but for now, he's letting go of the fears he has so that he can be with her and be present.

His lips brush against hers, but that's not as far as he goes. It's hesitant, as if he doesn't want to force what he's about to do on her, but if she doesn't like it, she can always push him away.

But he won't know her reaction until he tries, and so summoning up what nerve he can, he lightly traces the outline, the outside of her lip with the tip of his tongue. He knows she doesn't welcome touch, especially when she isn't expecting it, so he expects this to be something she doesn't welcome either. ]

[crazywall]

I'm not ruling the possibility out. This place is a trip, Alan. It loops, shifts, you are on a talkshow with Door? Crazy shadow people roaming around? A New York that isn't really New York? I wouldn't be surprised if there is more to it that we haven't found out yet.

[ After all, he ended up in another dimension after years of dreams about aliens and everything. Who says there isn't more to everything going on? ]

Multiple drafts and copies. So, like finding a needle in a haystack. I'll keep my eyes open. [ Given he has a book of them already? It shouldn't be too hard. Maybe he should give them to Alan. Maybe he shouldn't? He'll test the idea once the current issue is solved. ] You know? I don't think I've ever seen a room that you write in. You always seem to find me instead. I must be obvious to find.

[ He chuckles slightly. ] Donuts, that's a cop joke, right? Anyways, yeah. Krispy Kreme donuts. Have you had them? Really sweet, but, pretty good. Coffee isn't as good as the Oh Deer Diner stuff though.

[ Then, a smirk. ] I'm not sure a big shot city guy would like moving to a small town where everyone knows everyone. It's nice, but, you strike me as the kind of guy who'd rather keep his life private. Not that it's a problem. Just, y'know. People talk.

[ Tim checks the ammo as they leave the room. He goes quiet as the shadows shift around, mumbling the same crap they always do. Words, cults, stuff about stories. A few turn to look at them and Tim gently eases Alan around the corner. It doesn't take long for them to exit the Hotel and back to the dirty, newspaper, neon filled streets of the not New York City. ]

So, this Jesse Faden. She's important to you, isn't she? And I don't mean in the "oh I visited her dreams and gave her cryptic messages" kind of way.

[wontbeperfect]

[ Saga would only be lying to herself if she said that she didn't find herself unsure how to proceed with this conversation. She would never readily admit it out loud, but there is something about Jesse Faden that intimidates her, deep down where she hides her true feelings.

In Saga's opinion, although she is very much still working on forming it, the FBC Director is much more competent and solid in her abilities than Saga is. That's not to say she can't learn, and she wants to learn, but recent events have made it clear that she has a long way still to go. ]

All right, Jesse, then. And Saga's fine as well. [ To use Jesse's first name feels strange to her, but she decides that's just something she'll have to deal with. ]

You're telling me. And from the talking-to I got from that ranger, I was- Well, I am a bit of an idiot. But Wake had me believing that getting him the Clicker was the most important thing, and- did you know that my daughter Logan's gotten dragged into this mess?

[ Saga's tone shifts then, betraying her agitation and upset about that. ]

I need Wake to fix what he did. [ And fast. ] But I won't be poking around anyone's heads like that again if I can help it. [ I mean it, I won't be doing that again. It was a mistake, and I get that now. ]

But yeah, I have a few questions about things. About Wake, about you. About whatever the hell is going on here. What's the deal with Wake, anyway?

[outlierdirector]

[ She would argue the price she's paid is worth it. Sure, she's been knocked down for now. But, she's the Director. She'll bounce back by the time she's really needed. Besides, Anderson is alive, so is Steve, Estevez and Alan is here. Home. It's a small trade off and if that's what it takes? Fine by her.

The flat smile doesn't go unnoticed. Jesse's own fades slightly, pressing her forehead to his. Right. Not the time for light joking. She understands. ]

Yes, I am. I know you can find a way to end it all. You did it before, and maybe it seemed just as hopeless. But, you've got more tools and people this time around who can help. We just need to line the pieces up right.

[ Jesse let's a small smile shine in her eyes. ] Deerfest together. Got it. I'd say maybe even Coffee World... but we do have the business owners of that locked up at the Sherrif Station. It may not reopen soon.

[ Jesse can hardly recall the loop where this all started--the story and them. Bits and pieces survived, but not necessarily images with them. She knows the basics of anything in interviews they've had, who Alan is as a person, that they were intimate before, and that Scratch got the upper hand on her.

Everything else blurs and seems to come back in moments that are similar but different. Seeing him sleep on the couch is one of those instances. She must have fallen quick and fast if they've been intimate before. Something that he said or did opened that door for her to trust him more. What that is seems to be lost in to merged loops, but, she knows it happened. She can feel it with no hesitation.

And, given he's a writer, he probably remembers certain things without even realizing it. She just has an alien in her head that helps.

His fingers at her hip cause her back to arc into him. She leans into his touch to encourage him, a sharp gasp managing to escape her. Normally she might freeze and curl up at the sudden touches, but, it's Alan. She knows him and he knows her--and she can trust him. Even with something like this.

Another gasp comes from her as he outlines her lip. Her hips shift again followed by a sound she'd say is sort of like a moan, but not entirely. One hand moves to the base of his neck into his hair and the other presses into his back more. Suddenly he's not close enough and she feels like she's melting into his arms.

Weird, given she has never liked the feeling any other time. Losing control, melting. Only with him.]