ʏᴜɢɪ ᴍᴜᴛᴏᴜ ⌈武藤遊戯⌋ (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
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synthneon2021-06-01 12:07 am
inheritedpuzzle) wrote in synthneon2021-06-01 12:07 am
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YGO PSL | ❝ if i told you that you're not alone, and i show you this is where you belong. ❞
INSOMNIA REDUX
( continued from here. you wouldn't believe how hard it is to find gifs of yugi and atem together and it's heartbreaking. it's all SHIPPING FANART. )
[ For Yugi, Lunafreya is an intimidating person. Not because she's cruel or throws around her power like the bullies in school did. It's more along the lines of how Atem is intimidating. Both can firmly put their feet on the ground and stand against any storm. He's the one that stands behind them and cheers them on. Is someone like that really worth bothering her when it comes to his wounds? It's a stupid thought, and he knows it, which is why he hasn't voiced it to his other self. ]
I'm pretty sure that if you asked she'd make the time too. You're the one that met her first!
[ He has no problem with it. He just wonders what it was that drove Atem out for a walk that night. ]
Maybe we should both ask her?
[ That makes things less intimidating. For some reason he can stare down gods, Shadow Games, and help fight the darkness in hearts, but this is difficult. He supposes it's because, deep down, he feels as if he should have been able to carry it for Atem. Now he needs to rely on someone else for it. When is he going to be able to do something without needing someone else to catch him? Maybe that's just the kind of person he is and he'll never be able to grow out of it. ]
There has to be somewhere we can start looking...
[ Atem already went to the exhibit with Téa, so that feels like it is off the table. Yugi can't even begin to think of how to get back in touch with the Tomb Keepers. Shadi has disappeared without a trace -- no one has even really heard from Pegasus. He sighs and looks over at the Millennium Puzzle hanging off the side of the headboard.
Because, where else is a teenager going to place his ancient mystical item?
He turns properly to look at the Pharaoh. They've talked so frequently that he doesn't even see him as a ghost. Atem is there and real as he would be in flesh and blood to Yugi. It doesn't matter if they talk like this, or if Yugi is the displaced one, or if it's in one of their soul rooms. There's a frown on his face now and a sigh in his expression. ]
But, you're not really a part of me... are you? [ Maybe it's time to talk about this properly. ] Not like we thought at first. You're someone that had his own life. You ruled over people and armies! You might have even built temples or the pyramids. I want you to stay here with us. That means you get a say in what we do from this point on, Other Me.
[ Because there is this nagging feeling deep down that one day Atem is going to want to leave. Yugi has no idea when it will be, or what will cause it, but it's a sense deep in his heart. One morning, the Pharaoh will just want to return to wherever he was supposed to go instead of being trapped inside the Millennium Puzzle. He's been trying to brace himself and prepare himself for that day and wear a brave face like the Pharaoh does. It's... he just can't.
What he can do is read anything he can find on Ancient Egypt. He'll dig wherever he can to see if it triggers something in the memories of his brother figure. If that fails? Then, he can help him make more new memories. ]
As long as you want to stay here with all of us.
..... sponges I can manage, but garbage disposals??
same. 100% sameA duel between the two of them would be one of the greatest moments of Atem's life, if he's being completely honest. The fact that it wouldn't be a test of either of their strengths, with nothing dire or life-altering on the line, but something done just for fun makes that an incredibly appealing idea. If there was a way for them to do that, Atem would certainly jump at the chance.
He'd argue that there's never been brothers quite like the two of them. The bond they share is something special, something rare, and he wouldn't pass it up for anything in either this world or the world he came from. ]
Of course you will, but that won't stop me from worrying.
[ He knows he doesn't need to say that; his actions speak clearly enough on that subject on their own, but he wants Yugi to hear it anyway. ]
Now I'm not sure if we should.
[ He would like to know the answer to his question, but he'd also hate to trouble Yugi's grandfather with it. And what if he doesn't have the answer?
It's a silly question anyway, something only a sentimental fool would ask. Logically, Atem knows that the chances of his tomb being there and still in its original condition are quite low indeed. But even with all of that, there's a part of him that still wonders and longs to know, or even to see photographs of it, just like the pictures they've already seen thus far. ]
After all, there are other more important things we should be focusing on.
[ Yes, in the end, Atem still believes that other things must come first, even before searches such as the one they're conducting together. ]
have fun :D :D :D
/date night dishes thread nowMaybe they can find a way to do it. There has to be some way that someone can help communicate if the two of them wanted to do something like it. Or, there's always video games! It might not be the same as playing against one another, but, he has a few that he could share with Atem. There's enough winnings from Battle City that they could even buy a new system... that's a thought.
He'll have to as Joey and Tristan what games they recommend.
A playful remark is about to leave him when Atem turns the idea down. He frowns, his eyebrows turning upwards at it. What other things do they have that are more important now? They have the God Cards, and they can find a way to restore Atem's memories. In Yugi's mind, that's the most important thing.
After all, what earth shattering thing could happen next?
Still, with that far away look in the eyes of his other half... Yugi decides it might be best to let the subject rest for now. Maybe it'd be better to bring a lighter tone back to the conversation. And, well, he can't help but be curious about one little thing... ]
More important things. [ Yugi tilts his head back and pretends to think about it. Then, he leans slightly towards Atem with a mischievous look glinting in his eyes. ] Like... going on another date with Luna?
[ He says 'another' because really, what else would their first meeting be? Late night drinks together, long conversations? That sort of sounds like a blind date to him. ]
no, I don't think I'll have fun at all. >:(
totally going on the list of thread ideasIf nothing else, at least Atem could watch Yugi play video games and be astonished by the sight of it. Dueling arenas and duel disks might be impressive on their own, but video games are a whole other story.
And he doesn't mean to be discouraging any more than he wants to make Yugi think that he doesn't want to ask Solomon what he knows. There's a small part of him that's afraid of what they might learn, and while there's very little in either world that he's afraid of, even he has to admit that he's a little apprehensive.
So, he's just going to fall back on the idea that there are other important priorities that they need to pursue first, and then maybe they can revisit this one. ]
No, that- That wasn't entirely what I had in mind. [ He doesn't often look abashed, and Yugi may not be able to tell because of Atem's ghostly appearance, but there's a hint of red creeping up his neck. ]
Yugi, wouldn't you like to do something else besides dueling in tournaments and going from one dangerous encounter to the next?
[ He won't fault his partner at all if he answers that question with a yes. Atem can easily imagine that his own life as Pharaoh was one that was filled with danger, but that doesn't have to be the case for Yugi. ]
:'D /goes to nap bye
/makes big piles of thoseOf course it isn't what he had in mind. Yugi's more aware than anyone that Atem focuses on the road in front of them. He calculates their next steps, tries to assess the future danger. Yugi wonders how much that is from being a Pharaoh... and how much of that is who Atem always has been. It's hard to say without memories, but, Yugi likes to think that more of Atem's mannerisms and who he is are a part of who he really is.
The playful look leaves his face as he looks down. Do something else other than the life he's known since he put the Puzzle together? Of course. There are tons of things he wants to do, but they all revolve around his friends -- including Atem. How can he put that without it coming off horribly wrong?
Especially when it comes to Téa.
He knows that she said she's fine with him being him, and not his other self, but he also knows how she looks at Atem. He knows there has been a draw, and he namely keeps quiet about it. What could he say - that he's jealous? No, not really. Yugi has always been the small one to protect and care for... she even does it to a degree. There can't be much that's attractive about that. Even if he'd like to go on a date with her and try to see if she could really separate him and Atem. He also just knows it's a bit pointless. People's hearts do what they do.
That's why he tries to encourage Atem to listen to his own heart. Maybe that's harder for a Pharaoh to do. Maybe it's because Atem's soul room is endless doors and stairs everywhere. Or, maybe, Atem is holding back because of him. That's the last thing that Yugi wants. He knows things are limited, and there is only so much that can happen, but he doesn't want Atem to feel as if he can't have something outside the two of them.
His fingers brisk the top of the keyboard. ]
There's plenty I want to do. [ He frowns. ] Grandpa said that being the owner of the Millennium Puzzle means constantly tried, didn't he? That means, to some degree, that's how my life is going to be. It'll be one thing after another and I need to learn how to shoulder that.
[ It's something Battle City taught him.
Yugi finally looks back up at Atem. ] You need to be honest too, Other Me. Not just to me but to yourself. There's things you want to do outside of dueling and wondering what is going to happen to us next.
[ Maybe he shouldn't say it -- maybe it does need to be said. If anything, Atem will at least know where Yugi stands on the subject. Even if he doesn't get an answer about it all tonight? It might be something that Atem thinks over at least. ]
Everyone might think I don't notice things because I'm quiet when you're out, but, I do. I notice more than any of you realize. I know that Téa likes you. I've known her most my life, and she's never seen me the way she sees you. It's why I left the two of you alone that day for a date. I figured that it might help you when you have no memories, and it would give Téa time with the person she sees as more than a childhood friend. [ It stings to admit it out loud... but there it is. He's not jealous, he's not mad. There's a tone of acceptance in his voice. ] But... I see how you look at Luna. Maybe you don't realize it, or don't want to, but you look at her the same way. You like her, and I think she likes you too.
So, be honest about it. If you want to talk to her more, or see her more? I don't mind. [ The smiles doesn't quite reach the corners of his mouth, but he's very serious. ] You should go after it if that's what you really want. There's something else besides dueling in tournaments and the next encounter - right?
huff. fine >:( >:(
Being the Oracle carries responsibility with it, and as such, it isn't difficult for him to imagine that she doesn't often have time for other pursuits such as going on dates. Perhaps she even has someone else that she's interested in, someone who isn't a spirit without form most of the time who also has no memories of who he truly is. Either way, it isn't difficult for Atem to convince himself that he and Lunafreya are on very different paths in their respective lives. ]
Neither you or your grandfather are wrong, of course. It's best for you to be prepared for whatever might come, as much as you can. But- [ He knows how this will sound, and that Yugi will most likely tell him he should follow his own advice. ]
You are still young, and you should be able to enjoy living and spending time with your friends. [ From Atem's perspective, his time for that has long since passed, but Yugi is still in the prime of life.
But he nods slowly, because Yugi isn't wrong there either. ]
I admit that there are times when I find myself thinking of other things I would like to experience, but I believe that I am here to support you during duels, of course, but outside of them as well.
[ Perhaps he was too forward when he took control of Yugi's body and went for that walk that led to his meeting Lunafreya. It didn't occur to him until well after that meeting that perhaps he'd been a bit selfish in doing so.
But he pauses that train of thought and focuses back in on Yugi. ]
I suppose you're not wrong about Téa, but don't you think that if the two of you spent some time together, you might learn more about each other and attraction might begin to grow? [ He's hardly one to speak on this subject, but he can also see that Yugi likes Téa as well, and perhaps that day that he set the two of them up on a date was a hard day for him indeed. Sometimes Atem wishes he were even half as selfless as his other half, because more often than not, he puts him to shame. ]
What would happen if I simply stayed inside the Puzzle for a day or two and let you and Téa spend some time together? Because I see the way you look at Téa too, Yugi.
[ But he's not merely trying to deflect, just trying to be less self-absorbed and think more of others, just like Yugi does. ]
I suppose you're right, but I think, this time, you should go first. Ask Téa if she'd like to spend the day with you and see what happens from there.
[ A similar smile crosses Atem's face, but he too is completely serious with his suggestion. ]
no subject
Well, he did, until just now.
He's still pretty sure that if they asked to spend time with Lunafreya she'd say yes. ]
I enjoy all the time I have with my friends, including you. I just.. don't know where I want to go when everyone else seems to. But, I'm sure I'll figure it out.
[ As all he really wants to do is live in the present and not have things change. He finally got his wish, and there's a part of him that still isn't ready to let it all go and grow up.
He doesn't mind if Atem needs time to walk around and simply be. Even if that means needing to control his body and walk around aimlessly. They both share the body, so that means they should both have equal time with it if needed. All he asks is that if something happens he knows about it. ]
What kind of things do you want to do?
[ He could really just flip the conversation and say that supporting him is by Atem having something of his own. But, well, he hopes he won't have to. ]
We grew up together and spent plenty of time together. But... [ Yugi sighs and closes the laptop down with a frown. ] I'm just her childhood friend. You're the one that she's attracted to -- even before we knew we were separate people. She was trying to find ways to spend time with you. I thought maybe it'd be easier for you to open up to her than me because of it.
[ He forces a big smile then. Namely because it's something he doesn't plan on doing. Téa would say 'Yes', but, it wouldn't really be a date. It would just be another day of hanging out with him like they always have. There's no reason to ask her when he knows that is the outcome. It's been the outcome and even though she says both of them are people she cares about... he knows the romantic feelings go towards the disembodied spirit sitting on the bed. ]
I already know what she'd say. So, there's no point to it.
[ And that is that. ]
I'm fine the way things are.
no subject
Of course, he laughs and smiles around Téa as well, and of course he considers her a very important friend. But he hasn't connected with her the same way that he has with Lunafreya. And it's the fact that he's found someone with whom he can open up to that makes him want to try and help Yugi with Téa. No, of course he won't force anything, but Yugi deserves to find happiness as well, perhaps even more than he does. ]
You have time to figure things out, Yugi. And I have no doubt that you will. You'll learn just what it is that makes you happy and fulfills you, and you'll rise to the occasion.
[ He hopes that Yugi doesn't interpret his words as mere platitudes, simply saying what he thinks he wants to hear. He means every word, and he's completely confident that Yugi will figure out what he wants to do with his life. And even if he just wants to live in the moment and enjoy what he has, there's really nothing wrong with that as far as Atem is concerned. ]
Well, I don't know. [ In a rare moment of hesitation, Atem raises a hand to idly rub the back of his neck while he tries to think about his answer. ] I suppose there is one thing I'd like to do. [ But he's never given voice to it before. ]
But thoughts can change, can't they? Perhaps all Téa needs is to spend more time with you, in a setting with only the two of you. No distractions from anyone else, just you and her together.
[ And then when Yugi says that last part, Atem's expression turns into a frown, because he doesn't like what he's hearing. Has he really done Yugi such a disservice that he thinks he won't open up to him? If that's the case, then he's completely failed at being a good partner and friend to him. ]
Yugi, is that really how you feel? That it's hard for me to open up to you?
[ He hasn't forgotten the discussion about Téa, but what Yugi has just said worries him. ]
no subject
I already know what makes me happy. Fulfilled? I don't know. I'm not like you or Luna. I don't have a grand destiny or role to fill. Outside of making sure the Millennium Puzzle is safe.
[ He's fine with that. Really. ]
What's that?
[ Because, he'd rather not talk more about the situation with Téa. He knows how she sees him. So, the best thing he can do is just let it go. It'll take time, but, he figures it'll happen naturally and eventually. He doesn't even really address the comment about him and Téa. ]
At the time. That's not how I feel now. [ He shakes his head. ] We really hadn't figured out how to talk to one another like this at the time. That night when I asked who you were... I think that was the first time we really talked about anything.
no subject
I'm sure that's something that will come to you in time. [ He can't really say that he's speaking from experience, because who knows what his experiences really are? But something deep inside him is telling him it's all right to speak with confidence on this subject.
And he can tell that Yugi really has no interest in continuing the conversation about Téa, so for the moment, he decides to leave that alone.
I forgot what I was going to have him say.]Sometime when both of us have the time, I think that I would like us to have a duel. [ He knows how that sounds. It would be rather hard for one of them to have the time and the other not, but he knows Yugi will understand his meaning. ]
Not a duel in an arena, or using Kaiba's inventions, and not one with spectators. Just the two of us right here with our own decks and nothing on the line but an interest in-
[ He pauses, because he hasn't really thought about things as being for fun, but that's really what he wants to try. ] An interest in having fun.
[ It's an idea he's not familiar with, but he knows Yugi is, and he hopes that this proposed idea is something that appeals to his partner. ]
oh lookie there, this fits really nicely into future thread *ahem*
The inner thoughts are interrupted by the suggestion his other self gives. Yugi's head practically snaps up, eyes wide, and a child like light coming to his whole composure. Part of him has always wanted to duel Atem. Not to prove himself or show that he's just as good as him -- but just as a game. It feels like years since he's played Duel Monsters as a game and not some device to save the world.
How would it work? Who else can see Atem -- or him -- in order be a stand in? The logistics are enough to make his head spin. There has to be a way to do it though. It'll be something he figures out as they go forward. Even if it's just a way to figure out how to do it in their soul rooms. ]
I'd love to! [ Even that really doesn't properly put into words how much he'd leap at the chance to do this. ] We should make up our own decks. Or at least, write down what is in them. Just in case we ever get to!
oh would you look at that, it does
I'm not entirely sure how it would work, but between the two of us, I'm certain we can come up with something.
[ He offers Yugi a wide smile of his own at the suggestion about their decks. ]
That's a good idea, Yugi. If the chance presents itself at any point, at least we'll be ready.
[ He also intends to put some thought into how to turn their respective wish to duel each other into a reality. It'll be a challenge, but he's confident that they'll be able to work something out. ]
at least this thread ends happy DAMMIT
We'll figure it out.
[ This has to happen somehow. It's rare that he sees Atem with a smile like that on his face. Self-assured, ambitious, arrogant, and even embarrassed. However, joy? That's rare. It makes Yugi determined to have his other self smile like that more often.
He's been given a second life. He needs to live it to the fullest. As much as a dislocated spirit can anyways. So, duels with him, or a date with Luna? Yugi is going to find a way to make it happen.
He goes to speak about how he can roll over and go to sleep that way Atem can start working if he wants. He's more than aware that the spirit never sleeps, and, focusing on building a deck might give him something to do other than wander the endless maze of his soul room. Except, then, a beeping echoes in the room. Yugi leans around Atem - despite really not needing to - so he can look at the alarm on the phone.
It's already that early?
Yugi sighs and falls backwards on the bed. School.
Oh, right. He needs to text Luna too. ]
I guess the deck building will need to wait.