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synthneon2025-10-21 07:38 pm
bubblesong) wrote in synthneon2025-10-21 07:38 pm
Entry tags:
🩸 iron spindrift || ❝ waiting for a girl like you to come into my life. ❞
[ Arielle stands in the living room, hands and arm bundled in the cropped jacket she will be wearing with the full length dress she has underneath. The black dress that shimmers different colors when the light hits it in different angles. The bottom fans out like a mermaid tail. Hair done in usual fashion but with irridescient bubbles clinging to catch the light. Lined in irrediscent blue, a deep cut at the chest and exposed back. It shows more than she is used to, but this is a special occasion. She needs to make a statement not only as an introduction to the world. The other reason is because it is the birthday of her... she would call him her only one.
Tony Stark may not like the idea of a title that is so sentimental and binding.
Amber eyes lift idly to the ceiling as she once again mulls the idea over in her mind. She can remember being told that her species--what she had been turned into--had people they would instantly bind with. It had been a rather chemical and medical explanation by her adopted carer (not her maker), but it was apart of the chemistry of finding a mate. She preferred the more romanticized version of the idea which had been no surprise to her carer. If anything the neigh ancient vampire thought it heartwarming she could still believe in fairytales despite her new circumstances.
Her gaze softens. Do I still believe in fairytales? It's been so long.
She had been ready to die the day Tony Stark had found her on the beach amongst the waves. She had taken it as the one last good thing in her near one hundred year life that she finally met the one that would of been for her. It would have been fine to die after having met him, even if he never felt the immediate pull she had. He would have the rest of his life ahead of him and found someone else to be happy with. He, apparently, wouldn't let her go. Not that he could have known the thoughts running through her mind.
Not that any of that matters anymore! Especially one today. It's his birthday. A day she's more than happy to celebrate. She doesn't even remember her own birthday, which makes needing to celebrate his even more important. Years and aging still matter to a human. He isn't near immortal.
Arielle's attention immediately moves to the hallway as Tony walks down it. The gloomy like mood evaporates in an instant as she sees him. Her hands curl into the jacket she has held against her chest. Her heart pounds. It's almost like she is a young woman seeing her first crush for the first time. It's much deeper of a bond than that, of course, even if Tony doesn't realize it or doesn't see it that way.
Still, she smiles brightly, clearly head over heels for him and excited.
It's his birthday!
The realization it's technically the day people will learn about her and him--together--hasn't even crossed her mind. ]
Tony!
Tony Stark may not like the idea of a title that is so sentimental and binding.
Amber eyes lift idly to the ceiling as she once again mulls the idea over in her mind. She can remember being told that her species--what she had been turned into--had people they would instantly bind with. It had been a rather chemical and medical explanation by her adopted carer (not her maker), but it was apart of the chemistry of finding a mate. She preferred the more romanticized version of the idea which had been no surprise to her carer. If anything the neigh ancient vampire thought it heartwarming she could still believe in fairytales despite her new circumstances.
Her gaze softens. Do I still believe in fairytales? It's been so long.
She had been ready to die the day Tony Stark had found her on the beach amongst the waves. She had taken it as the one last good thing in her near one hundred year life that she finally met the one that would of been for her. It would have been fine to die after having met him, even if he never felt the immediate pull she had. He would have the rest of his life ahead of him and found someone else to be happy with. He, apparently, wouldn't let her go. Not that he could have known the thoughts running through her mind.
Not that any of that matters anymore! Especially one today. It's his birthday. A day she's more than happy to celebrate. She doesn't even remember her own birthday, which makes needing to celebrate his even more important. Years and aging still matter to a human. He isn't near immortal.
Arielle's attention immediately moves to the hallway as Tony walks down it. The gloomy like mood evaporates in an instant as she sees him. Her hands curl into the jacket she has held against her chest. Her heart pounds. It's almost like she is a young woman seeing her first crush for the first time. It's much deeper of a bond than that, of course, even if Tony doesn't realize it or doesn't see it that way.
Still, she smiles brightly, clearly head over heels for him and excited.
It's his birthday!
The realization it's technically the day people will learn about her and him--together--hasn't even crossed her mind. ]
Tony!
no subject
Her heart pounds and she squeezes his hand in return. Tightly.
The main area is filled with lights and music. So many people. It's almost staggering at first to hear so many heartbeats. She had gotten used to the quiet and only hearing a handful. Her gaze sweeps across them all, never once seeing them as potential candidates for meals. If anything? She sees people who could hurt her--hurt Tony.
Which is another reason she steps closer against his side.
Her hand curls into his arm at the introduction. All of the eyes on her. She's never been good at the center of attention. Still, she forces a smile, and a wave, and a quick "Hello" to everyone. She is certain to find ways to swing the attention and focus back to Tony no matter who approaches them. A few sparing glances are sent to Pepper and Rhodey to make sure they're okay... but this probably isn't their first rodeo with Tony.
A squeeze of his arm then his hand. She noticed what he said is true even if no one else caught onto any of it.
Dance with me.
The offer catches her off guard even if he had preface it before. She takes his hand, suddenly thankful for the dance lessons her brood brother's wife gave her. Things polished and built on from the lessons her adopted sister once gave. She is able to not only keep pace with Tony, but bring an old world elegance to it that none of the other couples have. Her head rests against his shoulder without even thinking or noticing.
Her eyes never leave him when they dance.
It is like a fairytale.
Still, she can't help but be glad she has slipped away once the party ends. Her hands curl together between her thighs. Another deep breath. The thunderous amount of heartbeats are gone. Now, to suppress the hunger pangs that had threatened to pull to the surface. Tony calmed her and helped her focus on something other than the fact her body reminds her it hasn't eaten properly in months.
That's okay! She has gone longer. It's just will power.
Her expression brightens when Tony sees her in the workshop. She's suddenly aware of how short the sleeping dress she is in truly is. He's seen more, once, but that doesn't mean he wants to see her that way at all! ]
No. You're still awake! And... we were going to talk. [ This is better to explain and understand before they continue on--together. He needs to know and decide. ] You enjoyed the party! I'm glad.
[ She wanted him to feel as if it was the best birthday he ever had.
Her hands curl against each other again. Arielle wants to reach out and touch him. She wants to feel the warmth that radiates from him. She wants to feel safe, secure, and loved if he does. Not yet though. Not until he knows. ]
I can sleep after we talk. You might too? Unless you had projects to work on!
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He stops in front of her, and as he looks at her, he thinks about the way the glow of the arc reactor kind of paints her in cool blues, like moonlight that somehow found its way into a house and underground. Her skin almost looks luminous in it. His pulse picks up, part curiosity, part something else he'd rather not name just yet. ]
Yeah, we were going to talk, and you're probably hungry. [ It's not a question, but it sounds a little like one.
He stops near her chair and leans a hip against the workbench, looking down at her. For a second, he doesn't know what to do with his hands. He's used to talking with them, gesturing, creating, building, but now he just tucks them in his pockets, because it;'s something to do. ]
She was right, you know. Pepper. Said you'd steal the spotlight just by walking around. Half the room forgot I was even there once you walked in. [ A small smile tugs at his mouth. ] Can't say I blame them. In the looks department, you've got me beat.
[ It's partly deflection, partly truth. The memory of her on the dance floor hits him again: the way she moved with a kind of grace that made time feel like it slowed just for them. He hadn't expected her to be so at ease in his arms, or for it to feel right the way it did. ]
But, you know, I really did enjoy the party. Okay, so I enjoy most parties that I put on, but this one... This one was great because of you. [ Then, in the interest in lightening the mood with a little humor, he adds: ] I get the feeling this isn't about the cake.
[ It's definitely not about that for him. He has something he wants to say, something he wants to ask her, but he has a feeling that what he wants to suggest isn't something she wants. But when he imagines her response to what he's been trying to figure out to say, he knows his own response would be to point out that they've moved past "want" and into the territory of "need".
That, and he can't imagine living without her, and he definitely doesn't want to put her in a position of having to live without him.
After a few seconds of thinking, he says: ] You like me, right? You like being here in this mansion, with JARVIS around and Rhodey and Pepper stopping in sometimes to bug me?
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She has said it already, but, she doesn't think Tony noticed the words. Maybe too many people have already told him they love him, so the word has no meaning now.
Her hands flex against her knees again. Not from needing to feed, but suppressing the urge to reach out and touch him. Hold his hands or his arms. Rest her head against his chest to hear his heartbeat and arc reactor hum. She's missed being so close to him. Everyone said he needed time to adjust after coming back. She understood and agreed.
It's just now, after the party... ]
I'm okay. [ Her answer is quick but assured. He wouldn't want to hear how long it had been since she ate when he offered first. ] It's just training myself again. I've done it before!
[ Tony isn't there to simply feed from. That isn't what she sees when she looks at him.
The man looking back at her is an inventor. A dreamer. Someone who can imagine something and build it for the world to gander at. A man of technological progress. A man who used fame and all the things with it to fill something inside him. Something she wants to help mend and make right, when it may not even be her place to do so. Not out of a concept of power or ego. He's hurting, and she loves him. Shouldn't she be the one to heal him when he is her one..
]
I didn't want to pull attention away from you on your birthday! Or, at all. Ever. [ her gaze lowers. ] I wanted you to have fun... and smile again. I wanted to look like what people would expect a woman next to Tony Stark to look like. I wanted you to like it too...
[ A change in her posture. Her shoulders sink, hands curl into each other more. An older look suddenly takes her gaze and her head lowers just enough to shift how the light from his arc reactor highlights her. ]
I wanted you to feel happy again. So, I'm glad that I made your special day a good one. Even if it doesn't seem like I am? I really am.
[ His questions catch her by surprise again. Had she given him the idea of something opposite? Did her hesitation and frankly fear of everyone seeing her make him think she didn't want to be here anymore? She waited three months for him to return... and even longer to meet him. Of course she loves living in the mansion! JARVIS and the robotic arms! Not to mention a home by the sea! Most of all? She loves him and living with him. But, Tony is someone who operates on science and logic. Not so much emotions--the opposite of herself.
How can she explain all of this to him?
Amber eyes close and she leans her head towards him once more. She doesn't touch him--waiting for the invitation to be given. ]
Tony, [ she ties to filter as much emotion she can into his name alone, ] I do. Of course I do! I like living here with you. I like watching you work. I even like just watching how you, and Pepper, and Rhodey share your lives like old friends! I like JARVIS and the robotic friends you've made too! Your cars, your mansion. I even like the very thing that keeps you alive and hums so softly no one else notices.
[ She loves it all. Maybe that's where she should start? ]
You offered to feed me before you left for Afghanistan... a-and I hesitated at first. You insisted, and so I did. That doesn't mean that's how I see you! I've spent so long suppressing it that I really don't notice when I need to feed and that's okay. [ A nod is given as if to confirm the statement. ] Feeding is... it's... uhmmm... it can be different depending on why. For most? It's sustenance. Sometimes we can make progney. But, then, sometimes it can be more than that. It can deepen a bond that's already there. When it's those times? It's not just feeding. It's sharing a small part of life that no other creature can in that way.
Uhm, [ she pauses, ] my adopted sire always said it was the vampire and the human reacting to each other chemically... and hormonally... and emotionally... psychologically. A way that the two bond on almost every level. That's why I hesitated at first... because I already liked and cared for you! A lot. Deeper than you know. I didn't want you to think or feel that it was only bonding because you offered to feed me. It was the reverse. It feels so intense because I already feel that way... and I have since you pulled me out of the waves and I saw you the first time.
[ Her shaking hands raise to gently brush along the hands in his pockets. A wordless request to hold his hands. His choice, because his choices were robbed from him. They kept him in that cave with no choices for him to make. They took away his safety. She doesn't ever want him to think she is robbing him of that. ]
We have a way of knowing who our partners will be. I know you don't believe in fairytales, so I won't describe it that way. There are just people that are our match, and we know when we find them. I--Tony. I spent a long time waiting to meet you. I waited so long that I thought maybe I missed you... and you had your life and lived it with another. It's why when you pulled me from the sea, I was... [ I was okay dying after I met you.
Arielle finally raises her gaze back to him. He isn't nostalgic so maybe he wouldn't want her story. ] You feel the things you do because of that bond. My feeding just made those feelings all the more intense. I don't want you to feel you have to be with me because of those reactions of feeding. I want... I want you to make any choice about us with your mind clear and knowing what your heart says. That's why I need to tell you everything you want to know. About me, about vampires. Any of it.
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Still, he wants to believe that what he's seeing is accurate. When she's looking at him like that, he finds it hard to really string words together. Maybe that's why, when she said she loves him, he didn't say anything right away. It wasn't lost on him; he knew she said it, and he instantly felt a flare of... of something. He can't put words to the emotion, only that it's strong and it almost knocked him off his feet in a proverbial sense.
He's not a vampire, and he doesn't have enhanced senses, but he can see the way her hands flex against her knees, and instinctively, he pulls his hands out of his pockets so that he can reach for her. He doesn't immediately close his hands around hers, but he's reaching for her so that she can reach back if she wants to. ]
You're not, though, are you? You've been training yourself, and by training, you mean going without. You don't have to do that, you know. [ He doesn't say anything, but he subtly briefly taps a finger against the side of his neck, just once. ]
Honestly? You think I mind if you pull focus? I really don't. Actually, what I mind is people looking at my... Looking at you. Looking at you like I should be looking at you. That probably doesn't make sense at all, and hell, if you want to look back at them, I can't really stop you, can I? [ He's rambling and he knows it, but he's trying to make sense of how he feels, and sometimes just letting it all out is the best way to do that. ]
But hey, don't I look like I'm having fun? [ He plasters on his usual wide grin for her, but there's something more in his eyes that isn't there when he's just smiling for the press or for an audience. ]
Okay, okay, I was just checking, because if you wanted to go literally anywhere else, I'll fly you there myself. [ Well, not exactly, but he'd get his private plane and a pilot to take her wherever she wanted to go.
But then he shuts up and listens as she launches into an explanation about feeding and how it works. He wants to know this, to learn about it, and so he stops talking so that he can properly hear her. It confirms a lot of what he's guessed already, and really, it just makes his determination grow. ]
So... hearing all that, knowing what I know... And what I know is that I love you a lot, like a hell of a lot. Why shouldn't we just keep doing it? [ For someone who talks all the time, this is another moment in which Tony is finding words difficult to grasp. ] I can't see myself with anyone but you, so I guess that means you're my match. You're stuck with me and I have no intentions of ever ditching you. [ Not ever. ]
Look, Arielle- I love you, you love me for who knows what reason, so why don't we just do the thing already? [ He knows that maybe he shouldn't talk about the act of feeding so casually, and he gets the feeling that if it were any other vampire, he might get slapped in the face for talking about it like that, but he's never felt like he has to put on airs around Arielle. ]
... Don't make me put on ten hours of the Barney theme song, because I will, if it helps you get the message. At least the "I love you" part.
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Sounds that she continues to make even now.
Tony reading her emotions does mean he is good at reading her. Not many could. Then again, it makes sense her other half would be able to sense what she thinks and feels with no effort. It seems like he is like her--they both have learned how to read others and the room. Maybe their reasons for reading others is different. The why doesn't matter! They can. That is what matters.
A tap to his neck and she gives the barest of frowns. No, she won't feed from there if she has to feed. There is too much danger in her mind. A major artery... if she pierced it with her fangs... ]
Ahhh... [ Arielle moves to answer the rest of his statement.
She stops before a sound even leaves her mouth.
"I love you a lot... Look, Arielle--I love you,"
Her heart pounds. Her hands curl around his out stretched ones. She said she would take his out stretched hands if he ever held them out. Her thumbs gently brush over the back of his hands. Arielle loves him so much... that's why she can't just... so easily without a care or thought for his wellbeing...
Her heart pounds harder. Love and hunger. It feels dangerous--horrfying even. Even after all this time her own nature scares her so much. What if she becomes a monster?
I wish I could be human again for you. ]
Tony... [ a waver in her voice and how she says her name. The end of his name extended, emotion filtering into her tone. Awe, love, fear of herself, wanting nothing more than to protect him. ] It's not because a lack of loving you or loving you as entirely as I do. That's not why I...
[ Her posture deflates almost in on herself. Shoulders fall, her head tilts to the side. Amber eyes close. Hands hold onto his tightly as if to request he doesn't leave her for what she is going to tell him. ]
I don't hate myself, but I don't like what I am. [ Arielle's grip tightens. ] I have never liked being like this. I didn't ask to be this! I didn't want to become something that has to take the blood of another living thing to be healthy!
[ Her tilted head nods in the direction of another wheeled stool in the workshop. She waits for him to take a seat in front of her. The tremor in her hands strengthens from all the emotions threatening to burst from her. Eyebrows knit together even as her eyes remain closed.
I wanted to sing for everyone... ]
I'm--we're not undead. That's the stories that were made by everyone else. We don't call ourselves 'vampires.' The term we use for ourselves is 'Ekon.' Most stay out of the public eye and keep to our own circles. We try to integrate into human society to be safe. Some use their old titles, but, most try and hide. There was a Great Hunt years before I was turned that led to a lot of us being killed. Then, they led another one the same time I was turned...
[ Arielle's eyes open slightly, but they are cast downwards at their hands. ]
1918. That's when I became this. I was in London, at an all girls boarding school. London was in a quarantine because of an epidemic... and I was on my way back as night fell. Someone--my sire--attacked me from behind. He... it... ohh... [ She dissolves into a barrage of sounds for a moment. Then: ] I don't know who my sire is. He left me there to change by myself. I crawled out of the bushes and into the streets as the sun came up, but, I was still alone...
[ Arielle bites her lip. ] You're not here just to sustain me or to be my food. But, if you insist? I will.
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He knows she doesn't want to feed on him, and she certainly doesn't want to feed on him from that spot on his neck, but it was the clearest way he could get his point across, that he wants her to feed from him whenever she feels the need.
She doesn't answer with words, instead making what he guesses is the start of a sound that trails off gradually. He waits for her response, because he knows her and he knows that her responses are complex and full of layers and he's had to learn how to interpret what she says by taking in her movements and her expressions and the tone of her voice. And, really, he's never minded it; he's good at studying people and he's a quick study, but even he thinks that Arielle is like an onion, with so many layers to learn about. ]
You don't like what you are, huh? Well, you know what that means. [ His fingers curl against hers in return. ] I know this isn't what you want, and you didn't ask for it, but you know what? I'll like who you are for you. That's got to be enough, right? [ He knows that the sentiment is a corny one. He knows that it's more hopelessly romantic than he'd like it to be, but hey, at least it's honest. ]
Seriously, Arielle, I like you. I love you, and yeah, I love you even as you are. And no, I haven't been studying romance movies or books so that I'd know what I should say. That's just how I feel. [ And he's not really one for talking about his feelings, but he's not stupid enough to believe that guys shouldn't talk about their feelings. There's just a time and a place for it, and this is that time and that place. ]
You're gonna say that all I'm doing is splitting hairs, but I want you to be healthy, and if that means I'm- [ He was going to say that he'd be her on demand buffet, but that's in bad taste even for him, and even if it wasn't, he knows she wouldn't like him saying that. ] Even if that means that I'm your main guy when you need to do your thing, I'm in. I'm 100% in. The end, end of story, no sequel. Not for this.
[ She wants him to sit, so he does as she's indicated, sitting on the stool in front of her and just shutting up and listening.
He doesn't really react until she begins explaining the Great Hunt and then the events of 1918, in London. As she goes on, explaining how she came to be who she is now, Tony's expression shifts. His jaw tightens and his eyes narrow as visible anger shows on his face; it's not directed at her, because why would it be? It's at whatever monster attacked her and then left her there alone. He doesn't have to be an expert on Ekons to know that what that person (and he uses that word lightly) did is reprehensible. ]
Do you know where this... sire is? I'd like to have a word or two with him.
[ A word or two, and maybe a punch and something more final. ]
I know what I'm here for. [ Kind of. ] I also know that I want to help you be healthy, so yeah: I insist.
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A deep exhale leaves her then. ] Ninety years...
[ A glance upwards at him once he has sat down. Ninety years since she was turned. She spent almost all that time waiting for him. She was proactive, of course! She traveled the world and met so many people. Friends that she tried to protect from the Guard. People that came and went out of her life.
Her gaze drops and her eyes close again. Her fingers brush over his.
It seems like there is no arguing or trying to convince him otherwise. Would it be otherwise? He's her other half. Of course he would want to make sure she will be healthy. Alive. ]
You would be the only "guy." [ Another deep exhale and she looks up at him properly. ] I... I haven't eaten since you left for Afghanistan. Before that? It was decades. There's no one else. Only you.
[ She wonders if that holds any weight to it at all. Pepper had made it known in her own way that Tony had been something of a womanizer. That he had multiple women and no real lasting relationships. She means it though! He is the only person that she loves. The only one that makes her heart flutter. The only one she wants to kiss, and hold hands with, and share be in an intimate relationship. ]
...No. I never met him properly. He just... aahh... aoou....
[ Another squeeze to his hands as she tries keep herself in the moment. Her mind doesn't need to wander back to that night. How it felt to have everything pulled from her. Afraid. Alone. The pain in her shoulder at the flesh that had ripped from her as her sire tore away from her. There was so much blood. Her blood. ]
My adopted sire found me! He took me in with his lady... and they helped me understand everything and what was going on. I stayed with them for a while until the pandemic was over. It's been a long time since I've seen him.
[ Arielle blinks once, then twice. ] You're here to be more than just my person, Tony! You're here to build amazing things to help the world. I know it. That's who you are.
[ She places his hands on her bare thighs (the nightdress is shorter than she expected) and raises her hands to his face. Her trembling and chilled hands rest against his cheeks, but the smile on her face is bright. Then, she directs him to rest his head against her chest. That way he can hear her heartbeat. It's loud, fluttering, strong despite the weakened state she has put herself in. She's alive just like him. She loves him and she hopes he can hear that. ]
Okay... w-when you're ready. Uhm, was there anything else you wanted to know? About me, or Ekons, or... anything?
no subject
Instead, he squeezes her hands and curls his fingers around them as if trying to offer some kind of comfort even though he's not really sure how best to do that. ]
You know, I really would like to say that you're the only one, the only woman, but- I know you've talked to Pepper, and she more than likely gave you an earful about me and my habits. But... [ He shakes his head. He doesn't want other women now, as surprising as that is, even to him. ] I realized at some point in all this that I don't want anyone else. I just want you.
[ He huffs out a laugh. ] Maybe I'm finally growing up, just like Dad always told me to.
[ But then the laugh fades and the hint of a smile goes with it, because he can tell that Arielle seems more than a little agitated as she talks about her sire. ]
He was an asshole and he didn't give a damn about you. [ Tension forms around Tony's jaw as his tone drops. ] I'm not going to be like that. I'm not going to be like him.
[ He takes a breath then, as if needing a second to internally decompress from all this; he feels like he has no right to feel tense or wound up, not when it's Arielle who's been through easily the worst experience he can imagine. Afghanistan is nothing compared to that. ]
At least your adopted sire is a stand-up guy. [ Tony briefly marvels at how his world has shifted to talking about sires and Ekons and blood, but hey, at least the twists and turns keep things interesting... maybe a little more interesting than he signed up for, but when has he ever been okay with being boring? ]
I can build things and still be your person. Help the world, well, that's a tall order, but I'm working on it one thing at a time.
[ He feels her place her hands on her thighs and she can most likely feel the it when he very obviously shivers at the sensation. Then when she pulls him in closer to rest against her, for just a second, he lets his eyes close so he can listen to her. ]
Weirdly? I should have a million questions for you, but I just... [ He reluctantly pulls back from where his his head was resting against her, but only so that he can plant a kiss on the closest part of her he can reach: the side of her neck. And once he has, then he goes right back to resting against her. ]
no subject
[ Then, her gaze softens into some form of understanding. Tony doesn't truly doesn't believe in words. Actions, maybe even over time, are what he believes in. Proof in doing not just saying. She can do that! She'll spend the rest of his life proving it if that is what it takes. A brief nod is given to herself to confirm the decision. Okay. That's what she'll do.
And a compromise in the mean time. ]
We can go on dates if you don't think it's enough? [ She smiles at him, a bit bashful, but a quiet determination lingering as well. ] Or travel when your work lets you! I don't want to be in the way or cause any problems...
[ It's not a secret Stark Industries has been putting out fires since Tony's announcement after he returned from Afghanistan. Stane has been doing his best to handle the PR disaster. Or, maybe he hasn't? Arielle doesn't trust him. He's one of Tony's longest friends, so she won't say anything, but she tries to put distance between him and herself whenever he stops by the mansion.
Now that she thinks about it? Stane wasn't at the party...
Arielle refocuses on what Tony says. A nod. Pepper made sure she knew, in case Tony ever brought home a woman. Her heart sunk, but, she understood. She took too long to find him. It only made sense that he was looking for his partner. Or, maybe he wasn't looking for a partner, and only for fun. Pepper seemed to think it was the latter. ]
I understand. That's why I just have to do my best to be better than them and give you everything you need! [ She pauses briefly. ] I should have found you sooner. So, that's my fault. It's another reason why I need to better for you.
[ Arielle quietly realizes that Tony has never truly mentioned or spoken about his parents. The Starks are famous, of course, and she had even heard of them. Her adopted sire had said he was going to meet Mr. Stark--Tony's father--the last time she had seen him. That was... oh, the early 1990s. Before she met Levi. ]
You're nothing like my sire. [ Her tone is filled with assurance. ] If you were? You would have left me on the beach! But, you didn't! I already know you're nothing like him. Everyone else thinks you don't care about things around you. I know you do. It's obvious to me!
[ Her head turns slightly and she nods towards the robotic arms. Her eyes glance up at the ceiling to gesture to JARVIS. Tony puts so much time and detail into his creations. She knows he loves them. He may never use that word for them, so she will for him instead. ]
Huh huh! He's a doctor. That's how he found me. He was making rounds at night to help people during the pandemic. It... was probably easy to find me with how much blood was everywhere. [ Another pause. ] I'm not sure my sire even meant to turn me. Maybe I was an accident and I was just supposed to be sustenance. He didn't treat it as if I was supposed to be his progeny.
[ He didn't treat her brood brother like a progeny either. But, that story can be for another time. Tony's shiver causes her to frown in apology. She is far from warm, and maybe that's because she has effectively starved herself. That's something she doesn't think she can do better than the women he has had--be warm. Comforting. All those good things associated with physical warmth.
Still, he rests his head where she has directed. He even kisses her neck. A small giggle leaves her at the motion as he settles his head back against her chest. One hand of hers raises to thread itself into his hair, starting to detangle the waves caused by the gel used for the party. His hair is still long and floppy. Trimming it after Afghanistan obviously wasn't important. Her other arm wraps around him to hold him. ]
Happy Birthday, Tony.
[ Arielle feels as if this has been what he has wanted for his birthday. So, she will keep him close and let him rest as long as he wants. Her cheek rests on top of his head. ]
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And, well, anytime Arielle moves, he can't help but pay attention. ]
I just have this stupid idea in my head that I have to do things. I have to show you how I feel, and how I do that is... by doing things. Dates. Being together. Kissing you. [ He kisses her hand to prove his point. ] And please, you'll never be in the way.
I can think of several people who can occasionally be in the way, but it's never you. Look, you don't have to do anything. [ Tony realizes he doesn't want to do anything. He just wants to be for a little while. Maybe he's tired, and maybe he'll never admit that to anyone, but maybe he doesn't want to go full speed ahead for 5 seconds.
Except of course, he kind of has to, what with Stark Industries to run and the fact that his weapons are out there being misused. ]
You're fine, okay? You don't have to do better, you don't have to do anything.
[ Of course he's listening to every word she says. He'd never tune her out, and he'd never ignore her. He wants to know about her, to know what she went through to get here. All of it gets filed away. He doesn't plan on forgetting even a single thing she tells him.
He smiles as she threads her fingers into his hair. Maybe he'll let it grow and never cut it again, except for a trip. ]
Yeah. Happy birthday to me. And I think it's dinnertime for you. When you're ready, of course. Do you like a little warm up before you start? If so, I'm your guy. I was already your guy, but- yeah. You know what I mean.
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Okay! We'll go on dates and travel when you have the time! [ When he isn't running Stark Industries, or having to do damage control, or building things. ] Mmm... not having to do anything...
[ She doesn't agree. Of course, Tony could still have been a playboy if they met when he was younger. Maybe when he was in school! Or after his parents died! If she had met him then? Maybe things would have been different. Things wouldn't have hurt him so much. He wouldn't have felt alone--if he ever did. ]
I should have gone to Afghanistan with you.
[ She had almost insisted going with him. It is a dangerous place. She wanted to protect him. But, she knew Tony, Pepper and Rhodey would have said no. It would have been a risk, and two of them aren't aware that she's an Ekon. Pepper would have argued optics probably. Stane wouldn't have wanted her involved in the "public image." After all, Pepper didn't even go... ]
I should have pushed to go.
[ She would point out that she had eaten at the pary if they hadn't already discussed it. She gives him a smile regardless, cheek against the top of his head, even as some part of her still revolts at the idea of feeding from him. It was the same the only other time he had her feed. She knows he does it from a place of caring and love... ]
Ah, no! It should be okay. Whenever you're ready. I'll just use the same place as last time...
[ Arielle nods and sits up properly. Once Tony sits up as well, she waits for him to get ready. Her hands fold in her lap nervously, trying to keep her cheeks from burning too red. ]
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[ He tips a wink at her before lifting his head from her shoulder, eyebrows drawn together but softened by that half smile he only ever seems to have around her. ]
You don't get to retroactively sign yourself up for a war zone because you're feeling romantic now, okay? Total honesty here: I think that trip never would've happened if... well, you know, Pepper or someone would've stopped it, calling it another one of my really bad ideas. [ He's still deciding how he feels about it all. In a way, he's glad he went, and he's mostly certain he wouldn't change it, but things like that are complicated on a good day. ]
Afghanistan was... It was a mess. Well, of course it was. It was a war zone, and it was partly my mess. My weapons, my mess. Didn't matter that I didn't know what my weapons were being used for. But... If you'd been there? [ He shakes his head, thumb brushing lightly along her knuckles. ]
I'm glad you weren't. Not because I don't want you around, but- yeah, it's better that you weren't there. [ He kisses her hand again, slower this time. ] And for the record, I wasn't alone, and I'm glad about that, but I just didn’t have the right person in my corner yet. That's what makes it different. [ He's glad he met Yinsen; he's not glad he couldn't save him, and he's not discounting what meeting him meant. Maybe in a weird way, that was a stepping stone to... this. Whatever this is.
When she mentions dates and traveling, he laughs. ] You keep talking like I'm some overbooked CEO. I can make time. I just never saw much point in slowing down before. Turns out I do now.
[ Her nerves about feeding don't get brushed off; they're too obvious for him to miss, even though he operates at a speed of 90 miles an hour most of the time. Right now, though, he's taking it slow.
He settles beside her, exposing the same place as last time, brushing his fingers over the spot in what's meant to be a silent invitation. ] No rushing. No pressure. Just us, like always. Whenever you're ready, take it away.
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We could plan our... first date at least tonight? [ Amber eyes flick to the side and her shoulders curl slightly. ] Even if it's just deciding if we want to go out to dinner or visit somewhere! That's enough.
[ Her fingers brush along his cheek as he kisses her hand again. Of course he wouldn't have wanted her in a war zone. It would have been chaos in the sense of trying to make sure she was safe. There is the element of thought that he would have been so concerned for her that maybe selling the weapons to the State Department wouldn't have worked because she was distracting him. That was what she would have figured Pepper or Stane would have argued, which was why she didn't even put the idea forward at the time. But, now... ]
I wanted to go with you to keep you safe. [ Arielle closes her eyes. She knows he'll continue to say it was good she wasn't there. She just wants him to know. ] I almost jumped onto the stairs onto your plan after you and Rhodey got on. I was afraid something bad would happen if I wasn't there... but maybe it would have happened even if I was there.
[ Her hand gently reaches out to trail down the fabric in front of his arc reactor.
Then, she pauses and looks up at him. There was someone else with him in the cave? How many people were held prisoner? Was he the person that made the arc reactor for Tony? There are so many questions she has... but now isn't the time to speak about them. She can ask another time. Maybe after some more time has passed and things are settled in his company. ]
You are busy! You always have so much going on. I don't want to get in the way of that and pull you away from those things you love. I want to be apart of it! So, if that means I need to wait for you to be available or to schedule that time? I'm okay with it!
[ After waiting ninety years, what is a few days?
She thinks that... but those three months where he was in Afghanistan felt longer than those ninety years combined.
Tony moves besides her. Her eyes catch the stool swirling around and she offers him a smile. Nervous, but still filled with that unspoken but obvious love that almost seems to radiate off her. Her gaze drops when she sees his fingers move over the spot she had used last time. The marks are gone, so part of her can't help but be surprised he remembers the spot. It must have left more of an impression than she thought.
One shaking hand raises to wrap gently around his arm to hold it. The other reaches out to his leg in an attempt to hold onto something of him to ground herself. The change is always mildly horrifying to her. She doesn't want him to see it, causing her to be thankful of how her hair cascades over his arm and hides her face. The amber eyes shift to an under tone of red and she feels her fangs grow. Fingers curl around his hand in a quiet plea that he helps her through something that should be so basic to her kind. Something she has already done once with him--but now it's different. It's more intimate. It's something shared between them. ]
I'll try to make it painless... okay?
[ Arielle tilts her head down to hide her face entirely with her hair. She lines her fangs to where they had been once and does her utmost to gently sink them into his arm. Her fingers curl into his hand more in an attempt to comfort him from the act. Eyes close as she focuses on keeping herself grounded. No more than two drinks. She'll be fine on that. Don't be carried away and let this horrible thing she has become take over.
Two drinks, almost like inhales, and she is pulling up from his arm. Her lips stay against his skin to try and stop the bleeding. A glance is cast to the side as DUM-E rolls over with a tray, gauze and tape on it. ]
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[ He leans lightly into her touch, but when she brings up Afghanistan again, he frowns. ]
Just so we're on the same page here: you wanting to protect me isn't the problem. You being anywhere near that mess? Near the bombs planted on the side of the road? [ He shakes his head. ] Aside from giving me a constant heart attack thinking something might happen to you... That's not an exaggeration, by the way. I already know that the ideal outcome, the ideal result, whatever you want to call it, would've been both of us coming back on a plane, but- [ He looks down for half a second. ]
If only one of us came back... Well, it would have to be you. No question.
[ But since this turned a little too heavy for his liking, he adds quickly: ]
For the record? You do not get in my way. Not even close. I'm busy, mostly because Pepper keeps scheduling things, but- yeah, I got some things I actually have to do, so I guess I juggle a lot. But you're not some calendar clog I have to work around. If I want time with you, I make time. That's how this works.
[ When she shifts closer, nervous and bracing herself, Tony moves with her, getting a little close but not too close. ] You know you don't have to hide from me, right? Go ahead. I'm fine.
[ He trusts her, because he has no reason not to. Still, when the bite lands, it surprises him, but at least it's quick and sharp and he doesn't pull away or tense up. If anything, he shifts his thumb against the back of her hand like he's telling her to keep going, that he's right there with her. ]
Hey. You did good. [ His tone is matter-of-fact, like he's just stating the obvious. Then DUM-E rolls up with the tray and Tony snorts. ] Yeah, yeah, bring Daddy the tape. You want to patch me up, or should I? Oh, and when we're all done here, we're finding a place to get comfortable and pick a place for this date so I can pretend I'm spontaneous.
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She frowns then. ] I wouldn't have come back if you weren't there with me.
[ It is a statement she knows he will hate the moment she says it. He needs to know how she feels about the inevitability of their relationship. How she feels about the fact of "overthinking" them. Tony is a genius, he'll be able to put the dots together.
The ones that say, without her needing to voice it, that she plans on leaving the mortal plane after he does.
If that turns out to be tomorrow or in fifty, maybe even sixty years. The "when" doesn't matter. She has made up her mind. When he leaves his mortal coil? She will follow after him. Maybe then they will find themselves in new lives where they won't be so different. A life where she will be warm to the touch and he won't have to share the essence of his life to keep her healthy.
She gently brushes her lips over the holes she has left in his arm. Ones she can't heal on her own. Marks that she will give him again and again at his own insistence. ] I know. It's just... I don't like this. Not yet. Maybe I never will. It... I just need some time before I can show you.
[ Tony seeing her like that is something she can't bare at the moment. Her hand curls around his to brush along his thumb as a silent "Thank you" for everything he has done for her. She gently glides her lips over the marks again. There is lingering blood she can feel her heart quicken over. That almost animalistic instinct wants to take ahold and have more. She needs more--but, no. She has had enough for now.
Arielle finally raises her head to meet his gaze. Fangs have gone, but the red glint in her eyes remains. The crimson color that seeks to connect with him on that deeper level.
A shakey inhale. ] I can do it. I'm the one that made the holes.
[ She sits up, reaching over and taking the gauze and tape. A gentle pat is given to DUM-E in thanks before she wraps, cuts, and tapes the area. It may take a little bit of time to heal, but, it should be fine within an hour.
Her eyes lift to look up at him once again. One hand gently rests on the rolled up sleeve of his shirt, while the other curls into his pant leg. Her heart pounds in her chest all of a sudden. It's so loud in her ears. She knows what this feeling is, but doesn't expect him to return it. Just... the motion for him to understand. It isn't just him that feels the pull and desire to claim and be territorial.
Her head tilts down to press her cheek into his arm. Arielle inhales deeply and gives another squeeze of his leg in apology for the sudden need to be close. She even tries to press down the sudden waver in her voice. ] W-where do you want to go?
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Full disclosure, if you- [ The words trail off as he tries to figure out how to say what's on his mind. ] If you- well, if you weren't around...
[ He makes a noncommittal jerk of his head as if to say he might as well just lose himself in his work and stop interacting with people at all. ]
I know what you meant, and just so we're on the same page? Horrible retirement plan, for both of us. If that's the case, then I'm not planning on checking out any time soon. [ So you better not be going anywhere.
But he doesn't push harder than that. The tremor in her voice, the way she holds his thumb, the way she seems to be instinctively pressing up against him like he's the only solid point she can find... It all makes him lose some of the bite in his words and voice.
At that moment, DUM-E chirps, proud of himself, and Tony pats the bot with his free hand. ]
Yeah, yeah, you helped. Don't let it go to your head.
[ When she presses her cheek into his arm, clinging to him just a little, Tony goes absolutely still. Then e shifts his hand to the back of her neck, thumb brushing once along her hairline. He's not claiming her, not holding her in place; he's just letting her know he's there. That he's not pulling away from any part of her, not even the part she thinks she has to hide. ]
You never have to apologize for wanting to be close. [ He knows he spends a lot of time keeping people at arms' length, but in his mind, when he does let people get close, that's when it means more.
Or something like that.
Her heartbeat is loud enough that even he can sense the tension in her, and he lets her stay pressed against him for as long as she needs before answering her question. ]
Where do I want to go? Wherever you're going. That's the whole point of this date thing, isn't it?
How about somewhere quiet? Somewhere you don't have to perform or pretend or worry you're going to scare somebody.
[ He leans in, angling himself so he can lightly brush against her cheek. ]
Let's go somewhere we can just exist and... and be healthy. Together. That's where I want to go. [ He pauses for a second. ] The water. Well, the beach. You like the beach, don't you?
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Red tinted eyes follow the way he moves his head. All the projects scattered around the workshop, his cars, the robotic hands. A gentle look comes to her eyes. She doesn't think he would just ignore humanity as much as he says. He cares too much about what his weapons have done! He cares too much about Pepper, Rhodey, and even Stane.
Not that she plans on going anywhere anytime soon. She has only planned on leaving when he does. Accidents or something horrible could happen! Her extended life now as an Ekon is enough to show that. What happened to her sister shows that too. The fact Tony has a bright device in his chest now that has somehow saved his life proves it as well.
Arielle knows it is difficult to explain and therefore have him understand. He hasn't lived as long as her, he may not have even been looking for a life partner (or cared to have one). He hasn't seen how other Ekons have lived with their pair. She's seen the long term relationship with her adopted sire and his Lady. She's seen the tenuous relationship between her brood brother and his pair, and how the refusal to turn the other party has made a cycle of loss and reunion.
Finally finding Tony has simply cemented in her mind that she doesn't want to wait another ninety years to reunite with him. She'll take her chances in another life and find him again.
If she can find her Ekon family and introduce Tony to them? He may at least understand. She doesn't expect him to ever like her decision! At least he would see why she made her decision the way she has.
The thought of changing him has never crossed her mind. She hates what she is... why would she subject another to the life she's been forced into?
A wide smile spreads on her face at the pat he gives DUM-E. She adores watching him interact and love his technology.
His fingers brush along the bottom of her hairline. A shudder of pleasure rolls down her back. The white satin nightgown ties at the back of her neck, and that side of her she dislikes so much strikes a thought of him untieing it. She inwardly chastises herself. Just because they were intimate the first time she fed doesn't mean they need to always be that way! And, she doesn't want him to think they can only be intimate if she feeds.
She only apologizes because she knows he isn't someone who runs on physical affection.
Her eyes flutter shut as he brushes against her cheek. The temptation surges to use that ability of hers to help him feel her emotions towards him. That way he can understand how deeply she loves him and how much she never wants to let him go. No. She won't. It was a promise she made a long time ago. She will never give an order or channel her emotions in that way. People decide on their own and have their own emotions.
The beach...
Arielle stands. She shifts to be in front of him, fingers trailing from his leg and hand upwards until they rest on either side of his face. Eyes close so he doesn't have to see the red that has taken over; so he won't be influenced by jer emotions to be intimate.
Maybe one day he will tell her what happened in Afghanistan that changed his outlook so much. He may even tell her about the metal in his chest she can sense. ]
I won't be turning into mist or bubbles for a long time. I won't float away or dissipate. I won't be leaving you alone. I'll stay here as long as you want me to... and then, when that time comes you leave me behind? I'll turn into mist and bubbles then. That way you won't have to wait long for me.
[ Her heart continues to pound. Thumbs gently brush over his cheeks and along his jaw. ]
We can find a quiet beach somewhere, I'm sure of it! One that we can just be together at. [ Then, an embarassed smile touches her face. ] When I was a little girl? I always wanted to be like a mermaid! I... it turned out a lot different from that.
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Hey, no, stop.
[ It isn't harsh. It's quiet but just short of cutting, like he's trying to slice through the future she just painted before it can take root. He lifts a hand to the side of her face, thumb brushing the line of her jaw, not for comfort exactly, but so he can get her attention and have her look at him. ]
You don't get to schedule your exit around mine. [ His voice tightens. He wants to say that they go together and come back together, but it's not like he has control over that. He hates how raw it sounds, but he doesn’t look away. ]
You're talking like I'm a countdown clock, like once it hits zero, you... what, dissolve? Drift off? [ His other hand slides to the back of her neck, while pulling her a little closer. ]
I didn't ask for that. I'll never ask for that.
[ The red he briefly saw in her eyes doesn't scare him; if anything, it makes him let up a little because he thinks it's her trying hard not to influence him. ]
You stay because you want to stay, right? Because we want to stay. Oh, and for the record? You're not losing me anytime soon. I'm not planning on going anywhere.
[ He lets out a quick sigh to release some pent up... something. He's not sure what to call it, but it helps. ]
A beach sounds good. Just you and me and me pretending I'm capable of relaxing for more than five minutes. It'll just be you and me together, no disappearing, no dissolving. Definitely no mist, just us.
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That is why she stops. So she can listen to what he is saying and not saying. She can feel the meaning behind every touch and gesture. He doesn't want to think about her leaving, let alone dying. A quiet request she not even think about the potential future down the road for them. Living only in the moment, the now, and with him.
She can do that.
One hand raises to trail her fingertips at the back of his hand on her face. Her eyes remain closed for a moment longer. She almost tells him that she doesn't want to wait another nintey years to find him again. But... no, that's not something he wants to hear right now. Maybe never.
Okay. No more talking about it.
Her hand curls around his. ] I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I'm staying because that's the desire I have. Even if you didn't want to help me with my needs? Or, even if you didn't love me the way I love you? I'd stay. I'm going to stay with you.
[ Arielle lets out a breath the same time he does. She doesn't want to possibly influence him to do things he doesn't want to do in the moment. She doesn't want him to ever think she is robbing his choices and freedom away--because he had it taken away. Three months as a captive without knowing if he'd come home or survive...
He's asked her to look at him without saying it with words.
She lets out another shaky breath. Okay. Only because he asked.
Her head tilts into the hand on her face. She leans into the hand at the back of her neck. A movement into his space. Her lips brush against the inside of his palm, against his pulse, then against his thumb. Her heart races. Crimson eyes slowly open and meet his gaze.
She wants him in all the ways he could ever think. Not just because she's fed and her change instinct have switched on. Not just because her kind would move to seduce their pray. Arielle has missed him. Even if it was only one night? The distance she tried to respect after his return from Afghanistan has only made that desire deeper. She thinks desire, because it sounds more romantic than just hunger. ]
Which beach is your favorite one? Let's go there.
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His thumb shifts against her cheek, a slow, grounding motion, like he’s making sure she’s real. That she’s here. ] Arielle, you don’t stay out of obligation. Or loyalty. Or because you think you owe me something. I won’t have that. Not from you.
[ His hand tightens around hers; not hard, just enough to be unmistakable. Anchoring. Intentional. ] But if you’re staying because you want to, because this is where you choose to be... then yeah. Great. More than great. I’m not pushing you away.
[ His gaze flicks to her mouth against his pulse, and instead of pulling away, he turns his wrist slightly, in a gesture of offer. ] I’m not pretending I don’t know what you are or what this means. I’ve thought about it, and I don’t do eternity lightly, if that's what this is. But if staying with you means changing what I am, I'm not afraid of that, surprisingly.
[ He pauses for a second or two and then he adds: ] I don’t want some vague number that no one knows. I don’t want eventually. I want to be with you, right now. [ "Forever" being the implication he hopes she gets. ]
You know, most people ask that like it’s a casual thing, typical icebreaker stuff. Ice cream flavor. Favorite movie. But yeah, I know exactly which one: Malibu. Not the flashy parts. There’s a stretch of beach, quiet, rocky, smells like salt and engine grease from the boats.
That's the spot.
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"I won't have that. Not from you."
So, Tony feels people only stay with him because of those reasons. They want things from him or his technology. They want him to fix their problems. That they stay because of some contract or because they're employees. They're bound by another external factor, not just because they have been friends for so long.
Her gaze softens. She should have found him sooner. He says she doesn't need to make it up to him. How can she not when it's so obvious to her that he has been as lonely as she has?
Another gentle--and what she hopes is sensual--kiss goes to his pulse. It's not that hunger driving her at the moment. It may always linger in the back of her mind. She wants him.
"...means changing what I am..."
The breath catches in her throat. He couldn't mean what she thinks he is saying without saying it directly. Everything in her feels heavy all the sudden, as if cement had been put into her feet. A sense of fear she hasn't felt in a long time tugs at the bottom of her heart and threatens to pull her down into a place she has tried to desperately swim out of since she became what she is now.
He couldn't mean it. He does, because Tony uses his words purposely. He doesn't understand what it means to be this way. Because I haven't taught him or explained it good enough. He can't decide something like this so easily. Except, maybe, it wasn't easily. Maybe Afghanistan...
So many complicated emotions rise up in an instant at the thought of him becoming like her. Having him know a hunger that lingers but feels it is never really sated. Knowing he will end up burying all the people around him as they die but he doesn't. What about his company and how he wants to change everything he's done? The idea that she could wake up every morning and see him beside her without the worry that he'll age and leave her one day. The concept that they wouldn't have to be apart and hopefully reunite again and again.
They wouldn't argue about it like her brood brother and his only person. If she changes Tony.
But, she couldn't feed him. He would have to have someone support him like he's insisted he does for her. Especially as a newborn. Someone else would bind with him. He'd have the feelings and urges for someone else that she feels right now. That they've shared. It sparks an unexpected feeling of jealousy in her that she hadn't expected.
The hand over his begins to tremble as tears well in her eyes suddenly. She can tell that it's the decision he's made. That's what he wants. ]
I... I don't know how to...
[ Arielle inhales sharply and closes her eyes. It's his birthday and this is what he wants. She can't make this about her or the sudden complicated feelings that have caught her entirely off guard.
But... ]
I'll find out where my adopted sire is and ask him. He'll know. Then, I will, okay? I'm sorry to make you wait more when it took me so long to find you... but I... I never wanted to know... so now, I need to learn. That way I don't do it wrong and then something horrible happen...
[ Then, they will have to find someone to willingly feed him for at least the first while. They'll figure that out once she talks to her adopted sire. He's a doctor and a genius in his own way. He'll know what to suggest and what to do!
Then, Tony will...
The jealousy flares again. A possessive ugly jealousy that she almost thinks is uncharacteristic of her. The idea of Tony feeling the way she does for someone else is something she can't stand. So much so that both her hands hold his face and she kisses him. Desperate, loving, possessive in a way, and hungry all wrapped in a motion.
You're still mine though. Okay? ]
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Hey, you don’t have to apologize for taking time. Ever. I’m not on a clock here. Or I won't be, if... Well, you know.
[ He lifts his head slightly so she has to meet his eyes when she's ready to. There’s no flippancy in his expression now, no classic Stark bravado; he's just a man who has already faced the idea of dying and decided what mattered more. ]
I know it’s not simple; I know it’s not a switch you flip because it sounds romantic or because it’s my birthday or because I asked nicely. [ A faint huff of breath leaves him: almost a laugh, but not quite. ] Trust me, I don’t do anything important without overthinking it into the ground or until I've run a million what-if scenarios in my head.
[ When she says she’ll find her adopted sire, that she needs to learn, his jaw tightens, not in anger, but something like nerves. Worry, if he wants to use that particular word. ]
Okay. Learn, ask questions, so that when we do it, we're ready, and we do it right.
[ Her sudden kiss catches him off guard, and for a split second there’s surprise before his hands slide up to hold her, one at her jaw, the other moving to her back. He doesn’t rush it, doesn’t turn it into something reckless. He kisses her back with intention, with possession of his own, but respectfully too.
When they part, his forehead rests against hers. ]
I’m not asking you to change me tomorrow. Or ever, if you decide you can’t. This isn’t a demand. This is me telling you that if there is a way we stay together, really together, then I want it, with you.
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Her eyes open to meet his even once his head tilts back. The undertone in his voice... how much did Afghanistan do to him? Obviously enough that he has had to build an arc reactor in his chest to keep him alive. She can hear the metal in his chest when she listens closely. Pieces of metal threatening his heart, but never moving closer, because of the arc reactor somehow.
Something inside her eases at the kiss and feeling of possession that comes from him. It's not abrasive or controlling from either of them. A mutual statement that no one else has what they have for each other. People can look and comment all they want. But, she belongs to him and he belongs to her.
Her heart pounds louder. Amber eyes turned a deeper red still locked onto his. They stay together somehow. If she has to turn him, as he's asked? She will. It scares her; the idea of turning someone. Her own experience was horrible and ugly. No love or care for how the process went. That won't be how it is for Tony. She'll make sure of it.
A breath escapes her again. The desire and longing shows in her gaze. Not enough to command or influence him (she hopes), just enough for him to see what she feels. A press to his forehead even when they're still touching.
One hand brushes down his neck and then collar of his dress shirt. Fingertips trace the buttons of his shirt before slipping the first few undone. She brushes along the small portion of the casing for the arc reactor that she can touch. Enough to be suggestive and also ask if he would want her to continue. She knows she isn't as skilled as other women he's slept with. Their first time was a tad reckless and spur of the moment fueled by passion and the influence of bonding from feeding. Maybe it wasn't as good for him as it was her... ]
Tony. [ A slight waver is in her voice, trying to call his attention and not command him. ] You asked me to, so I'll learn how. Not because you pressured me or are forcing me. Yes... I'm scared. Because how I was turned was horrible and...
[ She pauses for a moment. ] I won't let it be that way for you. I'll make sure I'm there every step of the way. Every moment. You won't be alone like I was. I'll help you through all of it... that way we stay together.
[ A brush of her lips against his. Timed along with how she traces the casing in his chest. Her eyes flutter shut again and she shifts herself closer to him. A shrug of one shoulder loses the blue sleeping robe to slide off her shoulder. On the back of the shoulder is a scar that looks as if someone had torn into her many years ago. ]
You say I don't need to apologize or make things up. I do. I should have found you sooner so you weren't so alone. I should have been here with you after your family left you. I should have been here for you to hold onto instead of finding other partners. I was the one looking for you fo so long... and you still had to wait.
[ Arielle frowns slightly, allowing her emotions to shine through in her voice and eyes. Just enough so he csn feel a little bit of what she does. How deeply she loves him, how scared she was she'd never find him, how much she has missed him. ]
I wanted to go to Aghanistan to protect you and because I didn't want you to leave me behind. I knew you weren't dead, because I could feel inside you weren't. I was scared that it changed you so much that you wouldn't want me here anymore when you came back. That you'd want someone more human... but, I decided, if you asked me to leave I would. [ Because, I love you and want the best for you.
Her other hand on his cheek brushes the skin, tracing along the trimmed line of facial hair. ]
Everyone told me to give you space... and time... when you came home. I did! I didn't want to scare you or cause you to push me or anyone else away... so, I did what they said. Even when all I wanted to do was hold you. Kiss you. I wanted to ask if I could be the only person for you.
Tony. [ She brushes her lips against his again. ] I miss you.
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Hey, slow down. Let's just take a second to regroup. I'm not blaming you for anything, okay? It wasn't your fault.
[ Afghanistan took pieces of him. She’s right about that. But it didn't change how he felt about her, not even for a second. ]
I wasn’t alone because you weren’t there. I was alone because I didn’t know how to let anyone stay. And some of them didn't want to stay anyway. [ He offers a lopsided kind of smile. ] Still working on that first one, in case you hadn’t noticed.
Oh, and by the way, you don’t need to be more human for me. You're fine just how you are.
[ Then he goes silent for a few seconds, which turns into maybe ten more seconds. Then, he adds: ] I missed you too. I just didn’t know how to say it.
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No, he doesn't blame her for anything. She blames herself. She is the older one, the one who waited for him for so long. That means she should have done more to find him. She should have kept moving and not hiding from the Guard. If he doesn't like her blaming herself for that? She can't ever tell him why he found her on the beach. Why she was content to simply fade away in the seafoam as she watched the sunrise, sprawled along the beach.
Maybe she simply can't find the right words for him to understand.
Her hand at his collar buttons pulls back. It hangs over her heart for a moment before lowering down to her side. Red eyes close as she reigns everything she is feeling back inside. Not boxed up or compartmentalized like Tony does. Simply tucked away and kept to herself. The guilt, the shyness, the need to be with him that almost wants to burst from the seems. ]
You don't need to say any of it. I'll be able to see it. How you use words and communicate without them? That's how you are. I'll be able to keep up. I promise.
[ Arielle gently presses her forehead to his again. A relief swells that he missed her as much as she missed him. A reassurance that maybe he won't tell her to leave one day. ]
You're letting me stay now.
[ She tilts her head up enough to kiss his forehead gently. ] Thank you.
[ For loving her, saving her, accepting her, even feeding her when it's the last thing she wants. He cares for her without realizing it. She doesn't recongize when she needs to feed anymore. She spent so long ignoring it... a trait she shares with her brood brother.
She reaches up and slides the robe back over he shoulders. Putting herself together. Her eyes open and revealing their normal amber color. It'd hard! But, she can control it. Maybe she'll go for a swim when Tony finally sleeps. It'll help her just get everything that she's feeling out. ]
Are you going to be up any longer?