The focus, huh? I've never liked that, not even when I was trying to promote my books before. But as long as it's with you, I don't mind so much.
[ He's not really sure when he became so content with being quiet in the background. Probably thirteen years of having his mind poked at didn't help with his mindset. Now, he just wants a nice life with Jesse. No spotlights, no interviews, no publicity.
Fortunately, he doesn't notice Jesse watching him as he takes sips of the coffee. He's so focused on trying to drink it that her glances go completely unnoticed. He's not sure if he likes it, but how much of that is having forgotten what eating and drinking is? He stares down at the coffee, wondering if this is just how it's going to be for him: he'll eat and drink but not really enjoy it. It'll be something that he does, but that's it. It's just an action like getting up in the morning and getting dressed.
I don't want that. I want it to be more than that; I want it to be normal. But maybe I'll never have that again.
Fingers curl more around the coffee cup as he tries to navigate his thoughts and reactions before he decides to just put that to the side for now. ]
... Like what kind of things? I don't think I was much of a decorator even before all this.
[ He can't quite picture the apartment he shared with Alice, and even if he could, he wouldn't want to bring elements of that into Jesse's apartment. This space is theirs, but it was hers first. Somehow, he feels like he needs to respect that.
He wouldn't know where to start with picking out things to bring to the apartment. ]
no subject
[ He's not really sure when he became so content with being quiet in the background. Probably thirteen years of having his mind poked at didn't help with his mindset. Now, he just wants a nice life with Jesse. No spotlights, no interviews, no publicity.
Fortunately, he doesn't notice Jesse watching him as he takes sips of the coffee. He's so focused on trying to drink it that her glances go completely unnoticed. He's not sure if he likes it, but how much of that is having forgotten what eating and drinking is? He stares down at the coffee, wondering if this is just how it's going to be for him: he'll eat and drink but not really enjoy it. It'll be something that he does, but that's it. It's just an action like getting up in the morning and getting dressed.
I don't want that. I want it to be more than that; I want it to be normal. But maybe I'll never have that again.
Fingers curl more around the coffee cup as he tries to navigate his thoughts and reactions before he decides to just put that to the side for now. ]
... Like what kind of things? I don't think I was much of a decorator even before all this.
[ He can't quite picture the apartment he shared with Alice, and even if he could, he wouldn't want to bring elements of that into Jesse's apartment. This space is theirs, but it was hers first. Somehow, he feels like he needs to respect that.
He wouldn't know where to start with picking out things to bring to the apartment. ]