[ Sometimes Alan thinks he can remember the times they were intimate together. Specific details seem to be elusive and difficult for him to focus on, but he remembers little things like the touch of her hand, or the feeling of her lips pressed against his. Other times, he remembers something more, like a feeling of slight pressure, as if he's recalling a time in which they put aside boundaries and roadblocks and became one, pressing themselves into each other as they kissed or did something else intimate.

He wants that back, just as he wants the kind of synchronicity back that they once had. Maybe he barely remembers it, but the memories of it are there and they're trying to make their way back into his mind again. He doesn't want to be distracted and far away like this forever.

He wants to be there for Jesse in every sense, not halfway there as his mind remains somewhere else. His gaze lowers, looking at where her hand is resting, as he tries to take hold of those elusive memories again. ]

Wandering with you sounds nice, even if we don't end up finding something.

[ He knows he just wants to be with her, no matter what they end up doing, and that thought solidifies in his mind when he sees her moving, and feels her press her lips and chin to his arm.

His head tilts down in return, and one arm moves to circle around her protectively but also lovingly and his hold on her hand tightens just a fraction. ]

I really love you, you know that, right? [ He hopes that she does; he hopes that she doesn't doubt his commitment because of the fact that they have yet to really be in sync as they used to be. ]