[ She makes him feel like he can smile again; it felt to him as though he forgot how, but when he's with her, he remembers. He doesn't think about the darkness that's still lingering and still clinging to him like a cloak he can't shake off. He just thinks about her, about those green eyes that he loves so much... He thinks about everything about her that he loves; and since he loves everything about her, well... he just thinks about everything.
There's a lot he doesn't remember, but at the same time, there's a lot that he does remember. He just has to remember that he remembers it, as strange as that might sound.
A memory is trying to resurface now, and for a moment, Alan appears briefly lost in thought. He's not washing away, he's just trying to recall something that's trying to slip away from him as fast as it appeared. ]
Except... [ His head tilts to one side as he keeps trying to grab hold of the elusive train of thought. ] It was morning like this, and... and we were in a car, going somewhere. You, and someone else. Someone else who was driving the car. But there were other times when it was morning and there was a shower waiting to be used. Wasn't there?
[ He might be combining memories from separate occasions, but the key to both of them is that it was morning in those memories. Or maybe it was afternoon in one memory, but he's trying to pull the pieces together into something that makes sense. ]
I know this doesn't sound like anything more than rambling, but- [ His eyes shift to where the bathroom and the shower in the apartment is, before they shift back to meet her gaze again. Maybe she'll know what he's trying to say without really asking it. Maybe she'll even remember the occasions he was trying to recall. Maybe she won't. He barely remembers them, but the memories still seem to be there somewhat. ]
no subject
There's a lot he doesn't remember, but at the same time, there's a lot that he does remember. He just has to remember that he remembers it, as strange as that might sound.
A memory is trying to resurface now, and for a moment, Alan appears briefly lost in thought. He's not washing away, he's just trying to recall something that's trying to slip away from him as fast as it appeared. ]
Except... [ His head tilts to one side as he keeps trying to grab hold of the elusive train of thought. ] It was morning like this, and... and we were in a car, going somewhere. You, and someone else. Someone else who was driving the car. But there were other times when it was morning and there was a shower waiting to be used. Wasn't there?
[ He might be combining memories from separate occasions, but the key to both of them is that it was morning in those memories. Or maybe it was afternoon in one memory, but he's trying to pull the pieces together into something that makes sense. ]
I know this doesn't sound like anything more than rambling, but- [ His eyes shift to where the bathroom and the shower in the apartment is, before they shift back to meet her gaze again. Maybe she'll know what he's trying to say without really asking it. Maybe she'll even remember the occasions he was trying to recall. Maybe she won't. He barely remembers them, but the memories still seem to be there somewhat. ]