[ He's waking up, or he's stayed awake, but he wants more. He needs more. He doesn't have all the pieces. They're hidden behind a wall or a door, and he can't get through either just yet.
What am I missing? I know I'm missing something. Maybe it'll come back eventually. But do I even have time for "eventually"?
His gaze travels to where her hands have come to a stop against his elbows. He thinks he's always liked it when she touches him, but now... it feels different. He likes it, and he wants more of it. Contact with another living person. It doesn't matter what kind of contact. It could just be a supportive, helpful touch, something to reinforce the idea that he's not alone.
There's something else too, something besides Jesse's touch, but Alan's having difficulty focusing on it. Maybe he knew what it was once, but something's obscuring it from him. He can faintly sense it, but that's it. It's there, but faint. ]
I.. I called you. I think I remember. Vaguely. Everything's vague, like it's hidden from me. Or hiding. I don't know where to look to uncover it. Maybe there's more answers in that page. Or do you have the answers somehow?
[ You're not going to fight the Dark Presence alone anymore.
She says those words, and Alan's shoulders seem to drop. Not because of anything bad, but because just those words on their own are words he never expected to hear from anyone. ]
It's been... it's been such a long time. I've been trying to fight it for so long. I never let anyone in, let anyone help. [ But she tried, didn't she? It's implied in that page. Or maybe I just think it is. ]
I... [ He's not nearly as good at controlling his emotions as she seems to be. His voice wavers, and a sheen of moisture covers his eyes. ] I don't want to do that anymore.
[ I need help. Is this the first time I've realized it? Admitted it? Even to myself? ]
no subject
What am I missing? I know I'm missing something. Maybe it'll come back eventually. But do I even have time for "eventually"?
His gaze travels to where her hands have come to a stop against his elbows. He thinks he's always liked it when she touches him, but now... it feels different. He likes it, and he wants more of it. Contact with another living person. It doesn't matter what kind of contact. It could just be a supportive, helpful touch, something to reinforce the idea that he's not alone.
There's something else too, something besides Jesse's touch, but Alan's having difficulty focusing on it. Maybe he knew what it was once, but something's obscuring it from him. He can faintly sense it, but that's it. It's there, but faint. ]
I.. I called you. I think I remember. Vaguely. Everything's vague, like it's hidden from me. Or hiding. I don't know where to look to uncover it. Maybe there's more answers in that page. Or do you have the answers somehow?
[ You're not going to fight the Dark Presence alone anymore.
She says those words, and Alan's shoulders seem to drop. Not because of anything bad, but because just those words on their own are words he never expected to hear from anyone. ]
It's been... it's been such a long time. I've been trying to fight it for so long. I never let anyone in, let anyone help. [ But she tried, didn't she? It's implied in that page. Or maybe I just think it is. ]
I... [ He's not nearly as good at controlling his emotions as she seems to be. His voice wavers, and a sheen of moisture covers his eyes. ] I don't want to do that anymore.
[ I need help. Is this the first time I've realized it? Admitted it? Even to myself? ]