synthneon | oceanview (different path) || ❝ turn the page i need to see something new. ❞

[ Her eyebrows knit further.

« Me? What can I do? I... I've done everything I can to keep my head down. I always draw attention no matter where I go. No matter how hard I try. As long as it's not enough to get THEIR attention. Not unless it's on my terms... wait, blood? »

Jesse's green eyes dart down to Alan's hands. There is blood on them. Not much, but, enough where it can stand out. Dried, so it's not on her door, which is a good thing. She wouldn't want to explain that. ]

I don't know how I could...

[ Jesse trails off and looks to the side. Polaris tugs her mind to the "crazy wall." There's something Alan needs there?

None of it makes sense.

Polaris hasn't been wrong before.

She closes the door for a moment. The sound of the chain can be heard. Then, the door reopens enough for Alan to walk inside comfortably. Jesse closes the door quickly and slides the chain lock back in place.

The apartment is clean, tidy, almost doesn't look lived in. Except for the notes pinned to the wall. Jesse awkwardly shifts for a moment rubbing her shoulder. ]

There's a bathroom you can clean up in if you want. [ She glances Alan over again. Some blood, bits of dirt, greenery from the forest. ] Do you... sorry. I don't usually have .... well...

[ A sigh. ] Do you want coffee? Breakfast? Maybe you had some already...

This is such a long shot. A fool's hope. [ But I'm a fool. I've been one for years. But if it comes down to doing something and not doing something, I know which one I have to choose, even if I think it's shit. ]

I th- No, I shouldn't just jump in headfirst, or you'll really think I'm some nutjob who just banged on your door for no reason. I promise there's a reason.

[ Alan scrubs his face with the heel of his hand. He does feel like hell, now that some of the adrenaline that's been fueling him has begun to fade.

But she closes the door, and he stands back and waits for a moment, wondering if that's it. That's his answer. But then the door opens again and she lets him in. ]

Uh. Thanks. I half expected you to shut the door and just walk away. I wouldn't blame you for it.

[ His eyes scan around the room, but nothing except the notes on the wall is really all that notable. His gaze lingers there for a moment before turning back to Jesse. ]

Yeah- if it's okay, could I borrow your bathroom? And uh... well, coffee would be great. But you don't have to, I didn't come here expecting anything.

[ This isn't her playing host to a visitor. He barged in uninvited. ]

[ Something of a half-smile comes to Jesse's face at the suggestion she'd close the door on him. It's a shy smile, as opposed to humorous or sarcastic. She rubs her opposite arm nervously, trying to wrack her brain for what she should do with guests. Offer a place to sit, drink... breakfast makes sense even if he turns the idea down. She hasn't eaten since.

Well.

Sometime yesterday.

Jesse nods to his question. She gestures to the door for him. Then, she's making her way to the small kitchen. Coffee is an easy way to start and when she feels more at ease she can turn her attention to breakfast.

The door to the bathroom closes and her eyes go to her own personal crazy wall. There's a sinking feeling inside. He saw it. There's no way he didn't. It's the only thing on the walls. Not to mention she was taking notes in the diner when he rolled into town.

Jesse steps back into the living room when the coffee is ready. She puts one cup on the table for him, then takes her seat on the floor with her back to the crazy wall. She sits cross legged with the cup in her hands and green eyes focused on the liquid in front of her.

« What could I even help him with? He's a famous author. Everyone knows him in town. And, well, Rose fawned over him. A lot. Is he going to think I will? I haven't read any of his books. I'm not a local, so I can't point anything out to him... »

Polaris shimmers.

Jesse sighs a little to herself. Of course she's going to trust Polaris... the entity is the only person--well, thing--she feels she can trust. People are harder to trust.

None of them believe her.

She raises her gaze once Alan steps into the living room. He looks a little better at least. She gestures to the coffee cup on the table for him before glancing to the side, then down again. Polaris shimmers once more, shifting to insist it will be alright. Jesse frowns before looking back up at the famous author. ]

...what did you want my help with? Sorry. It's just that. Well. No one asks me for anything.

[ Well, that's encouraging. That small smile gives Alan the smallest glimmer of hope that maybe this isn't a fool's errand, that coming here won't accomplish anything except for causing confusion for both of them.

She lets him in, and she agrees to let him use her bathroom, which is honestly more than he'd expected. He tries to not take too long, but he manages to clean off his hands and splashes some water on his face both to clean up but also to try and keep himself awake. It's not that he's in danger of falling asleep standing up, but he's been going for who knows how long, and who knows how long he'll have to keep going. The coffee might help if she still offers it to him, but this is the next best thing until then.

While he's drying off his hands and face, his mind is already off and spinning. He had seen the wall of notes, and it brings to mind the notes he saw her working on in the diner. There's only so many people who take notes like that: law enforcement, reporters, and investigators. Maybe that's it. Maybe she's a private investigator working on something. Either way, she could be useful.

When he finally joins her again in the living room, in spite of himself, he all but makes a beeline for that cup of coffee. He doesn't chug it down, but he sips at it as if it's the best thing he's had in years. ]

I- uh, well, it's going to sound insane, but some insane things have happened over the last... Actually, I don't know. It could be hours, but maybe it's days. [ His eyes shift to look at the clock on the wall and he notes the time. It doesn't do him much good for forming a frame of reference, however. ]

I can't go to the police. I don't know why, I just- [ He lowers his voice. ]

I don't know who around here I can actually trust. [ But I'm going to trust a girl I saw in a diner writing notes. That makes a lot of sense. ]

First, I need to ask: are you from around here? There's a method to this, really.

[ Surprise touches her face at how quickly he takes to the coffee. They always say the Oh Deer Diner brand is good, hut, Jesse really hasn't found a fondness for it yet. Someone could say she doesn't have a fondness for much of anything and they'd be right. Attachments aren't something she's invested into in a long time, despite how young she is.

Her posture doesn't change as Alan begins his explanation. No judgement or uncertainty passes over her. Insane things? It's broad but, yeah. There are definitely weird things going on in Bright Falls. Weird things that have always happened.

« Pepple never rely on me--they shouldn't. They never believe me. Trust me. Why would he? » ]

No. I... I'm originally from Maine. I've moved around a lot. [ Her gaze drops. Why is she telling him these things? Why would he care? ] I won't be staying. Once I save up enough? I'm leaving.

[ There's a pause. She reaches up and brushes the longer red hair out of her face. Not that she looks back up at him. Jesse's learned not to look at people when certain topics come up. They all wear the same face and same eyes.

Poor girl. She's still in denial over what happened. The industrial accident must have been horrific if she clings to the idea.

Her head lowers slightly. ]

I get not trusting people. Authorities.

Edited 2023-12-06 03:29 (UTC)

[ He knows how it looks, but it's not just about the coffee. He's not a coffee addict, not really. It's just that in the middle of all this weirdness or whatever the hell it is, a cup of coffee is something normal. A constant. A reminder that while things might be spinning out of his control, pulling him along to.. to whatever, but at least for right now, he can drink a perfectly normal cup of coffee.

There's more that he should be saying, more explanations that he should be giving, but the facts and details are all mixed up in his head. He was trying to get to the cabin he was supposed to stay in at one point. He remembers meeting someone he wasn't expecting. Not the person in charge of rentals. How do I know that? I don't know what's going on. All I wanted was to get away, and just have time to think, but I guess I can't even have that. I thought that maybe I could at least pretend to be normal. Guess that was stupid. ]

Maine, huh? I always wanted to go there. It looks nice in pictures. But yeah, something tells me leaving's a good idea. I don't know what I was thinking when I picked this place for a getaway.

[ He doesn't really expect anything from her. The coffee was a surprise. He thought she'd yell at him to go away, to leave her alone. ]

If I told them even the basic rundown, I'd get laughed off. Or locked up. I don't know, I know it's insane that I'm even here talking to you. [ He scrubs his eyes with his free hand. ] I guess I should start at the beginning. If you want to hear about it, anyway. I wouldn't blame you if you told me to get out. But I just thought... I had a hunch about you. A stupid one, probably.

[ Calling it a writer's instinct is stupid, but Alan just gets brainwaves about people sometimes. At least, that's how he views them. ]

[ « Well, I doubt he had you in his head telling him to come here. »

Polaris shifts again in something like amusement.

Jesse glances up at him, then behind her at the wall. She's quiet for a moment but that seems hardly inconsistent with her. She doesn't talk to people much at first. Not until she can figure out how to go with their flow. What to avoid, how to pretend to be normal around them. The kind of normal they expect.

Alan Wake's normal is one she hasn't had the pleasure to figure out until now.

She scoots herself a little closer. Hand still holds her untouched coffee. ]

You can tell me. [ She wants to know why he wanted in her apartment. Why he came to her and not people he knows. His agent and him brushed her warnings off earlier. About Rose. Why does he want her to listen to him? ] From the start.

Edited 2023-12-07 03:44 (UTC)

[ He really wants to have a closer look at that wall, but he needs to explain some things first, if he can just figure out where to begin. Well, he knows what the beginning is, but that doesn't feel important. ]

All I know is, a lot of crazy shit happened the second I got here. Well, almost the second. Okay, maybe it wasn't right away. But I definitely remember stuff happening that's like the kind of things you'd see in movies. Or in a book.

I think I fought a guy, but he wasn't himself. He kept moving weirdly, and saying weird things.

[ His hand curls around the cup of coffee as he tries to recall exactly how things happened and in what order. ]

Have you ever seen someone who didn't like flashlights? I don't mean just not liking them, but like they actually recoil from the flashlight beam. That's what this guy I ran into did. It was weird, like he wasn't- Maybe he'd had too much to drink, but I don't think that was it.

And that's not the weirdest thing either. There was supposed to be a cabin I was going to stay in, but the cabin didn't exist. Whatever the hell that means. And- And...

[ For some reason, Alan finds it suddenly difficult to keep talking. ]

[ Jesse's eyebrows knit and her face turns into a frown as he continues. Not that she dismisses what he says. No, it's not that. She's just having a hard time following what he's trying to say. Almost like his adrenaline is still pumping and everything that's happened is trying to come out at once.

« This is getting us nowhere. » ]

Okay--woah. Let's... how about we start from the beginning. [ She puts her untouched coffee on the table. She leans forward, pulling her hair back from her face once more. ] Then we'll work our way till now. How's that sound?

[ Her head tilts to the side. ] You came to Bright Falls a week ago. Stopped at the diner to visit someone to get keys for your cabin. Right? [ « Well, he'll know for sure I was eavesdropping. » ] So, the cabin exists, but it also doesn't exist. Apparently. But, no one had seen you in town for the last week. What happened between then and now?

[ She's not wrong about his adrenaline pumping, and the coffee he's drinking isn't helping with that. Maybe he should slow down or risk being headed for a crash. Except he doesn't have time to crash. Unless it's crashing a car, but he barely remembers doing that. ]

Right. Sorry, the beginning. Uh, I guess all of this would make more sense if I tell you I got drugged. My memory's kind of messed up. I'm a little messed up, but that's probably obvious.

But uh, about the last week... is it going to sound weird if I tell you that I don't remember much of anything? I remember coming to Bright Falls, the diner... [ Seeing her in the diner.... Telling her that won't help her think I'm not crazy. ]

The keys and the cabin. And then- I woke up in a crashed car. On a cliff. I think I remember the sound of someone screaming, but I don't know who that was. The voice was familiar, so I'm sure I know it, I just can't place it.

Wait--sorry, what? You were drugged?

[ Jesse immediately sits up on her knees at that. The rest of his explanation she can handle later. Missing time, crashed car, cliff. Someone screamed. Right, she'll take all those notes down for now. The most important thing is that he did whatever the hell he did last night while he was drugged? By what? Who?

« ...Rose? The waitress at the diner? That's why you wanted me to try and stop her? Why would she drug--oh, shit. Is she some kind of crazy fan? No, I don't think so. Crazy in that weirdly head-over-heels kind of way, sure, but I'm not sure she'd go that far. So, then, why... »

She takes a deep breath to calm herself down. Part of her isn't sure why she even cares or feels so panicked. Alan Wake isn't someone she's close to or should worry about so much. He's a famous author in a world a way from her. No one's really in the world with her.

Just her in the room with the poster taken off the wall.

Jesse stands up and stands to the side of him. She tilts her head, waiting for him to look up at her. It's obvious now that she's really looking at him how out of it he is. That doesn't mean he's lying about what's going on. He just needs to... stop. Rest. Recover. Then it'll make sense. ]

You should lay down. I'll get you water instead. Then, we can start over. Whatever it is you need it out of your system.

Yeah. [ He doesn't mean to sound so casual about it, but he's still not fully recovered from whatever it was he got drugged with. He puts down the coffee cup and scrubs his face with his hands. The coffee was a distraction, something that he knew he didn't need, but he found himself latching onto it anyway. It was warm, and reassuring, and hopefully not spiked with anything weird. ]

I didn't think that would matter to anyone but me and Barry. Barry, my agent and old friend. [ He makes a mental note to go back and check on Barry, because really, he's worried about him. He might be presented in the media as an asshole, but he actually does care about Barry. And he cares a lot more than people assume he does. ]

Lie down? No, I'm good. I need to tell you the rest. [ He takes a step forward, intending to start pacing around, and instead, his legs wobble unsteadily, forcing him to abandon that idea. ] Look, I came looking for you because... because other than Barry, and I need to go back and make sure he's doing okay- I never would have left him by himself if I wasn't... desperate. Yeah. That.

I need someone not involved. On the outside. Not connected to this. You tried to warn us, didn't you? Or did I imagine that?

[ He's not pacing because he doesn't trust his legs to hold him up, but his tone is agitated enough as if he was moving around the room. ]

[ Jesse stares at the older man as if he's missing something very obvious. A small gesture is made with her hand when he tries to stand and can't because of the drug still in his system. He's not in a condition to walk around, let alone stand there and relate a story to her. It seems though, Alan Wake is just as stubborn as she is, and won't listen when his mind is set on something. She sighs and stands up. She moves beside him to block any further attempt to stand up. It's something at least.

« Barry Wheeler? So, that's the guy that was with him when I tried to stop them. The one who brushed me off as if I was insane. He's not the first and he won't be the last. »

A glance is spared at the wall. She wouldn't say she's not involved. Well. There's pages about her. Does that make her involved? ]

I did. Yeah. Your, uh, agent pretty much brushed me off. [ She shrugs. ] Which... fine, by the way. I'm used to it.

[ « And, no. I don't plan on elaborating. » ]

So... You're missing a week worth of memories. You were in a crashed car. You somehow got yourself back to town because I've seen you around. With your agent. What else has happened?

[ Maybe somewhere beneath the shock and sheer disbelief about whatever the hell is going on, Alan knows he needs to sit down. He can't keep running full speed ahead at the threat that's seemingly in front of him. But he doesn't want to accept that. He doesn't want to stop and think about it, not until he gets a game plan. Or something like that.

He pins Jesse with a look when she moves in next to him in order to keep him from moving. ]

Look, I don't have time to stop. Something insane is happening, something big, and I need to find out more. He might have brushed you off, and sorry about that, by the way, but I'm not going to.

I think... I think somehow, Alice, my ex-wife... well, almost ex-wife, is in trouble. But I don't understand. She's not here in Bright Falls. I came by myself, so how could she be here and in trouble? I'm sure she wouldn't come after me. I know it sounds insane, but I thought it was her voice I heard screaming.

[ Jesse straightens at the look. Trying to make herself look taller and in control--when she has always felt the opposite outside of. Still, she wants him to know that he does need to stop long enough to work it out of his system. Then, he can go back and run in the woods to his heart's content.]

It's fine, really. I'm used to it. [ It always stings, but, it's the way the world is. Crazy Jesse Faden and her childhood imaginary friend. ] Okay, something big and insane is happening. You can't even think straight, Wake.

[ Should she be more polite?

Almost ex-wife?

Her gaze drifts back to the wall. Polaris tugs gently at her mind to the binder that she has stashed away. Should she really give it over? ]

You... you went to Rose looking for something. Right? That would explain everything going on?

Blame whatever I got drugged with.

[ Honestly, maybe he shouldn't have come here. He's not even sure what he's really looking to find. He didn't get anywhere with Rose, so he thought he'd try his luck with Jesse. But he doesn't really know what to say or what questions to even ask. ]

I thought that Rose knew something. I don't know why, just like I don't really know why I came to you. No, wait, I remember. Rose had a manuscript. I don't know how she got it. But I needed to get it from her to give to... to someone else.

But either she's involved, or she was forced.

[ She gives him an annoyed look. Obviously it's because of whatever he was drugged with. What she doesn't understand is why Rose would do such a thing. She didn't seem like the type. Even for an eccentric fan.

Polaris tugs at her mind again.

Jesse sighs and moves over to the crazy wall. She bends down and picks up a white file folder, sliding it out neatly. After a moment, she moves back to Alan. Her eyes remain on the folder as she debates pulling out the papers that have her in them.

« He'd figure it out anyways. »

Jesse holds the folder out for him. ]

You mean these? I think they're what you're looking for. I could be wrong.

[ He takes the folder, not entirely sure what he's going to see in it. But he recognizes the contents of the folder as soon as he opens it. Well, he might not know what's actually printed on the pages, but he recognizes the appearance of the pages themselves. ]

What- How did you find these?

[ For some reason, this turn of events surprises him. ]

Have you just been finding these around town? I thought I was the only one seeing them. I figured most people just thought they were random pieces of litter, not anything important.

[ He stares at her, still very confused but trying to put the pieces of everything together. It's not going so well, but he's trying. ]

Do you know what these are?

Edited 2023-12-14 08:23 (UTC)

They're all over town... sometimes in the woods. [ She awkwardly shifts side to side, her gaze falling to the side with a frown on her face. Withdrawn, guarded. Ready to be berated or even told something negative about collecting them. Why not? Everything else people tell her is that way. ] They sort of... glow, in the dark. I don't know if you noticed.

[ A shake of her head. ] They're almost like pages of a story. But, they're missing parts. I can't seem to put them together. [ Jesse frowns again. ] My friend suggested I collect them. I guess I know why now.

You're looking for them.

I know. I've seen them. I've tried to collect as many as I can, but- I've missed some, I think. Sometimes they get away from me before I can grab them. [ He's looking at her with an expression that's anything but displeased. He's curious, intrigued, and... relieved? Relieved that she's been looking for them too, and picking them up rather than letting them be lost. ]

I did notice that. I thought I was going nuts, but- well, maybe I am. Wait, I don't- I don't mean you are. That sounded a lot better in my head.

They're definitely pages of a story. I found the title page that proves it. That title is one I was going to use, but I never got around to it. [ He has to dig around through his coat pocket to find it, because he folded it up, but he pulls it out eventually. ]

I know it has my name on it, but I don't even remember writing this. And this is probably the part where you think I'm crazy, and tell me to get out of your place. Before you ask, I'm not pranking you. If anything, this is like me pranking myself, except I'm not laughing.

[ Her gaze lifts to his to see the complicated expression on his face. Nothing that suggests he thinks she's insane, or lying, just relief and curiosity. Her eyebrows knit slightly in her own confusion.

« Why would anyone be relieved that I helped them? I'm NOT... I just let them all down... disappoint them. »

Her hand extends out to see the title page he's written. Well, doesn't claim ownership of. His name is on it. It looks like the same typewriter wrote it as the pages she found. Her head tilts and she remains quiet for a moment. ]

"Departure." [ By something other than Alan Wake. Polaris shifts as if go confirm it. ] If you didn't write it... who did?

...and, yes. I'm crazy. [ Her tone is bitter at what she's said. Almost as of she's parroting something recited to her over and over.

Everyone thinks she is. Jesse isn't resigned to it, but it's clear she doesn't think other would agree. ]

Edited 2023-12-16 03:32 (UTC)

Yeah. "Departure." It was a title I was going to use, and I had the beginnings of a story in my head, but I never wrote it. As for who wrote it, that's what I'm trying to figure out. Did I write it and forgot? Why would it have my name on it otherwise? And no, I don't have a history of forgetting things.

[ But suddenly, Alan's expression changes. It's a harder expression, but he's not angry. He suddenly feels compelled to make a statement, a point... why? He's not sure. ]

You're not crazy. I don't know how or why I think that, but I haven't seen anything in the handful of minutes that I've known you to suggest you're crazy. No, you know what's crazy? Me barging in here and not even knowing your name. Now that's crazy.

Can you write a book in a week? [ Her head tilts the other way while looking at the page still. Nothing seems to be able to give her answers, and Polaris doesn't say anything one way or another. ] If you didn't write it, then, why the big deal about getting the pages back? That's what you were going to Rose for.

[ She pauses and shifts side to side again. ]

There's... a page? About you talking to Rose about it. With the rest of them. [ Jesse gestures to the binder. Her eyes dart to the side again and she rubs at her shoulder. ] That's how ... my friend and I knew to try and stop you from seeing her. But, it didn't work out.

[ Her green eyes fall on him again as he makes his statement. A sad bitter smile touches her face for a brief moment before it goes away.

« It's nice to hear it. Even though hed change his mind if I ever told him about you. Or Ordinary. Not that I plan to. It stays locked inside... and we're strangers. Once whatever this is figured out? He'll probably go back to ...wherever he lives. » ]

Jesse. [ She nods to the folder again. ] I'm... well. My name. It's on some of those.

I couldn't. But maybe something else... something more powerful could. I don't know how to explain it, this feeling of something else being at the wheel.

[ The more Alan talks, the more he becomes aware of a feeling of something else being inside him. He can't see what; all he sees is darkness. Something's taken over him, but what? ]

I don't know why I feel like I need the pages back. They feel important somehow. Maybe... maybe I need the pages to see what the story is and- [ It feels to Alan that his train of thought is running away from him, or being taken away, and he's having to chase after it to keep it. ] Maybe I need to change the story, to stop whatever's going on. I don't know how I know, but I think this story is a bad one. It's going to get people hurt.

... Jesse. [ He echoes her name, as if filing it away in his thoughts in an effort to remember it. Not that he thinks he's going to forget about her anytime soon. He's already noticed her fire red hair and green eyes that seem like they could just pull him in. Maybe he wants to be pulled in. Except maybe this isn't the time for that. ]

That's a nice name. It fits you.

Something else... [ Jesse trails off slightly, eyes still trained on the paper in front of her. She doesn't give the impression she dismisses what he says. It's almost as if it reminds her of something else, but she won't mention what it was. ] Do you remember anything about the pages?

[ « Need to know what the story is? Is that what all this is--a story? It doesn't feel like a dream though. It feels REAL. As real as Ordinary. As real as you do. » ]

What is the point of the story? What's it trying to achieve? If you know that, you might be able to stop it...whatever it is.

[ She glances to the side with something of a bashful expression in her eyes. ]

Thanks. [ A short statement that seems to be layered in several different emotions.It's nice to be complimented. Told she isn't crazy. But, he has just met her, and he probably will have nothing to do with her now that he has the pages he was looking for.

Jesse leans over and flips through a few pages. Then, she pulls one out, and puts it in the front of the others. ] Here.

Jesse Faden was not from Bright Falls. She wasn't a local. In fact, she was just staying for a short time. Once she had enough money to leave? She'd be on the road again. Moving from one town to the next. There was no real destination in mind. Just wherever the visitations from her guiding star pointed her.

Her guide seemed certain there was a purpose to being in Bright Falls. Something was shifting in the small town besides Cauldron Lake. Something dark from the lake; that Polaris didn't like. Something that would make the small town in Washington state change. The kind of change that haunted Faden's past.

Wake would need the pages that Faden's guiding star nudged her to collect. Pages that made a manuscript that Alice's kidnapper would want. There was more though that the star and the young woman could do. Extraordinary things.

After all, there was nothing ordinary about Faden.

You're sure you didn't write these?

oceanview (different path) || ❝ turn the page i need to see something new. ❞

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