𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓬𝓻𝔂𝓼𝓽𝓪𝓵 𝓮𝔁𝓪𝓻𝓬𝓱. (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
crystallinedreams) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
synthneon2022-03-09 10:17 pm
crystallinedreams) wrote in synthneon2022-03-09 10:17 pm
Entry tags:
FF PSL | ❝ two-toned echoes tumbling through time. ❞
To this riddle all souls are tied
Brief our moments, brazen and bright
Forged in fury, tempered in ice
no subject
Regardless, she curls further into his hold so as little space remains between them. Her gaze immediately jumps to his, searching for an answer to her own statements. At his question, she frowns, and the ear not in his hand presses to her head. ]
B-because I'm a Warrior of Light... and Darkness... and Hydaelyn's Chosen... a-and the Champion of Eorzea. E-everyone counts on Thisru and I. W-we're the heroes, we shouldn't be ...
[ Alkaid lowers her gaze as a shameful look crosses her face. ]
BrokenI.
[ Reason tells her otherwise. Surely the events of the First have bothered her sister just as deeply. Ardbert broke as well under the weight and shame of it all. They were all beaten and battered down by the full force and cunning of the Ascian. Yet... K'thisru and she are meant to rise up when others can't and lead the way. How can she do that when her mind traps her as it does?
Alkaid's hand tightens around his and her head tilts her cheek into his kiss. ]
You already are, my love. I... I could not do any of this without you.
[ Her ear perks up at the use of his love name for her. Her heart gives a strong beat and red takes her cheeks then. Alkaid curls slightly, only so her head might rest on his collar bone beneath the under armor he still wears. ]
no subject
Did you not tell me once that beneath all of my titles and responsibilities, I am still very much a man? You, Lantaa, are an extraordinary woman, and yet beneath all those titles and all your honors, you are still a woman, a person with needs and hurts that need to be soothed and comforted.
[ And if she is broken, then he must do what he can to help her pick up the pieces once more. After all, she has done so for him more than once. ]
And you will never have to, for I am resolved to remain by your side always. [ Or for as long as she will have him. His hold on her cannot be any firmer yet still gentle than it already is, but he wishes to just reinforce the idea that she is safe and protected and not alone. He tilts his head downwards so that his chin might lightly rest against the top of her head. ]
If there is anything more that you need, or anything that I might do for you, you only have to name it. [ He already considers himself at her disposal, and he wants to make that clear now in case there was any doubt. ]
no subject
Her cheek rubs against his collar bone. Anything that she might need? If only she knew where to start. After a moment, her head tilts upwards so she might look him in the eyes proper. ]
Help me ready for bed?
[ Alkaid dislikes how soft her tone is, how pathetic she must sound. She can manage on her own, of course, but there is something soothing in the idea of him undoing her ponytail and braids and seeing to the garments that belong to the Warrior of Darkness. It takes another moment before she pushes herself on her shaking legs to stand. Then, she turns so her back is to him so he might be able to undo the laces of her gown. ]
no subject
At the moment, he contents himself with being this close to her, to being able to hold her and touch her and be touched in return. ]
Of course. I would do anything for you.
[ To him, she does not sound pathetic at all. She sounds like the woman that he loves dearly and would do anything for, including putting his own safety on the line should that prove necessary.
For now, that is not the case, as he is certain he can manage undoing her garments without any harm coming to him. The slight tongue-in-cheek nature of that thought causes him to smile just a little bit, but he is quick to turn his focus to the laces on her gown.
As he works, he tries to think of what they might speak about as he goes about his task. ]
... Tell me something that you have not told me before. Perhaps something about yourself, or something you observed in all your travels. I would hear of it, whatever it might be.
no subject
Something she has never told him? There are so many things...
Her gaze settles on the engagement ring that only leaves her finger when she bathes or sees to caring for it. The look in her eyes softens before her eyes close once more. Perhaps that might be worth telling him. Something so that he may better understand her and why their promise of marriage matters so very much to her. Other than the notion that perhaps, in a life untouched by primals, they had been together. In a world before it was pulled apart at the seams and sundered. He might find that notion ridiculous; a wish that a young kitten had in hopes there was someone just for her. ]
Thisru and I left our clan younger than most Miqo'tes, I think. We parted ways after a carriage ride. She remained in Limsa to train as an arcanist, and then I made my way to Gridania. Both places are far from one another--as you know--and further from our clan. Given that... I spent quite a few Starlight Celebrations on my own. [ She gently twists the ring on her finger. ] Not that I was without anyone around me. There were the others of the Adventurer Guild, and then those of the Conjurer Guild. However, most of their families lived within the Shroud and would visit... or they would travel to their families.
I didn't want to go back to our clan. I feared the endless nagging of questions of when I would return home and stay home. I knew my mother would not relent until I did and took up my place and duty in the clan... waiting until another nuhn overthrew my father, or was called as a second leader. Then, he would father the next .... and I'm certain my mother would be thrilled to see it, but...
[ Alkaid curls the hand with the engagement ring to her breast and holds it there. Her tail sways slightly before her ears fold down entirely and her shoulders curl. She's told him, of course, how she had wanted her own mate. Now, however, it feels as if it is a secret that if uttered might turn him away. She shuts her eyes then and cradles her hands to her chin. ]
I didn't want my children to grow up like Thisru and I had. I didn't want them put between bickering parties for social standing or be told their siblings were not worth their time. [ She feels fresh tears roll down her face once more and curses herself inwardly for it. ] I thought that perhaps I might meet an adventurer that I could run away to a far part of the world and start a family with. But, I learned most adventurers don't have such goals or wishes in mind. They live for the thrill, not it simply being a way to achieve something else.
[ Her tail quickly flicks side to side before stilling. What else was there to be other than join the Scions when they offered? It was a way to do more, see more, help more people than she could if she were to remain in Gridania. She never thought it would lead to the things she had seen and done with her sister. ]
So... it became a habit that on Starlight Eve, I would make my way to the largest decorated tree that the Adventurer's Guild could find. Then--[ she curls up further, as if attempting to hide what she is about to say. ] I would look up to the stars... a-and wonder if someone else did the same, looking for me.
[ Alkaid pauses for a long moment and attempts to stifle the small sound attempting to make its way from her. ] I-I'm sorry, you probably want to hear something happier--you can pretend I said nothing and I'll think of something else...
no subject
The laces are not so many that he cannot manage them, but neither is he rushing through the steps of readying her for bed. While he works, he waits for her response, waiting to hear the sound of her voice that he has come to love so much.
When it finally comes, he falls silent, waiting to hear what she would say. She has spoken of her clan and the way that things work within Miqo'te society, but it is all very new to him, and he would be the first to admit that he does not know very much about how things function within different societies such as the one she came from.
His gaze softens at the knowledge that she and her sister parted ways, at least for a time, and that she found herself without a companion during several Starlight Celebrations. If he had known her then, he knows he would have loved to attend with her so that neither of them would be alone. But, he reasons, depending upon how long ago it was when her travels began, he may well have been one of the Temple Knights. Perhaps he would have been stationed elsewhere and not been able to participate in the traditional festivities in Ishgard or anywhere else. Certainly the Knights did not travel far beyond their borders, so such a thought is a silly one at best. ]
You told me of this once before, how you did not wish to follow that particular clan tradition. It must have been difficult for you, distancing yourself from it and from your family as well. [ He cannot help but smile at the line of thinking his mind has taken, because as far as he is concerned, she is his family, and they will have children of their own, whether through adoption or natural means. ]
I am sure that you are far too kind-hearted to put any children of yours in such a situation. I do not mean offense when I say that it does not seem to be an ideal situation for children or for the mothers who raise them. [ Although he is positioned behind her so that he can work on unlacing her dress, something in her voice tells him that she is experiencing no small amount of distress because of her recollections.
He reaches forward intending to rest his hand upon one of hers, hoping to offer her comfort while she continues speaking. ]
I must admit that although I did not seek out the largest of trees from our own celebrations in Ishgard, I did find myself spending at least a little time looking at the stars and wondering something similar to the thoughts you had.
[ He shakes his head once, and he lightly curls his fingers around hers. ]
I asked to hear something I had not heard before, whether happy or sad, because I- Well, I must admit that I rather like hearing you speak.
[ It is just another thing that he files away within his mind to keep him company while she is away on her various adventures, but truthfully, he simply enjoys speaking with her and hearing what she might say about any given subject. ]
no subject
[ She merely nods to his thoughts regarding the situation in which she grew up in. Her hand curls tightly around his, holding it to her breast. Of course, she knows she will need to let go in order to finish moving out of her robes. Yet, she finds she does not want to let go of him for any reason. Instead, she turns to face him, raising one hand to brush the tears from her face. ]
I m-may not have caught your eye as just a conjurer... not even a white mage. [ A sad smile touches her face then, looking down at the floor. After all, they met because she is a Warrior of Light. Nothing else would have most likely caused their paths to eventually converge as they have. ] I was always skilled at healing arts, but, I doubt I would have stood out against the astrologians of Ishgard at the time.
[ She squeezes his hand one last time before letting go of it--only so that she may start slipping out of the robes she wears. Alkaid pauses once she steps out of the robes, realizing she still wears her boots and garter belts. She blushes, despite the tear streaks, shifting side-to-side. Had she felt more like her regular confident self? She would have turned it into a tease or at least something seductive. Instead, she feels as if who she usually is has been stripped away and she's left trying to be who they all might expect her to be. ]
I-I hope it's not too much...
no subject
I suppose I must ask a question in that case. Would you and your sister prefer it if your places of residence were closer to each other? [ Ishgard is not exactly centrally located, and while he does not know where K'thisru intends to settle down, if either sister expressed an interest in moving closer to each other, he would certainly oblige. What remains of the household staff could maintain the manor in his absence, and he would certainly visit often to see to his affairs. ]
Even if you were merely an adventurer who wandered the worlds freely and as she willed, I believe you would have still caught my eye. [ Are they not destined to be together, after all? ] As famed as Ishgard's astrologians are, they are not you. I understand that my own feelings towards you may well cloud my judgment, but you shine brighter than all of them combined.
[ The moment she steps out of her robes and her boots and garter belts are revealed, his gaze travels to them and his eyebrows lift with surprise. ]
You look beautiful in anything and everything that you choose to wear. [ And although it is not the clothing he is accustomed to, he loves to see her different outfits and how she might look when he sees her next. ]
You are the most beautiful, if there was ever any doubt.
no subject
If only she felt as if she could truly express it. ]
N-no, Aymeric, please. The manor is fine. [ She shakes her head, ponytail bouncing side-to-side with the free strands brushing along her cheeks. ] I ... I don't think Thisru has ever thought to settle down anywhere. If anything? She needs a place to stay and call home. O-one that is offered to her, on the other hand...
[ Her ears raise slightly at what he says next. Alkaid stands in place, feeling the importance of each word wash over her. Her hands shake lightly underneath the fabric of her robes that she holds in front of her. After a long moment, Alkaid drops the robes to the floor and takes a timid half-step towards him. Her eyes move to her belts and boots. ]
I'm... I'm truly not all everyone thinks me to be. I'm... [ broken, terrified, hurt, and lost. ] I...
[ A moment passes before her shaking hands reach for his once more. Her fingers brush along his before she guides them to rest against the places he will need to be to undo the belts. Her hand stay atop his as she desperately tries to muster a lighter comment, a tease, a flirt. Something that seems more like the woman he knows. Instead, all that comes to mind is the fear that she might never be the person he can so clearly see. ]
I only want to be your lady. E-even if I'm... even if I... I can't be the woman you fell in love with.
[ She flinches then, as if finally saying the words out loud struck her in some manner. A few more tears stream down her face before she utters yet another apology. Aymeric has insisted otherwise, but she cannot shake the fear that he might ask her to leave if she cannot recover. The fear, deep down, that Emet-Selch managed to take away their relationship by breaking her. ]
no subject
My only desire, Lantaa, is to ensure your happiness and well-being, and that extends to your sister as well. If a life in Ishgard is not what you desire, I would not force it upon you. Instead, I will move mountains if I must to ensure that the pair of you have a home that suits you and is in line with your desires.
[ He can at least do that much, even if he finds himself at a loss for how best to help her with her thornier issues, the ones that will not be uprooted so easily. ]
You are yourself and that is all I could ever hope for and dream of. But if you will allow me to assist you, I would want for nothing else. You have been through a great many trials and I can see the effect they have had on you. What might I do to ease your hurts?
[ Affirmation of his love and desire to be married to her, of course. And so he reiterates that very thing: ] No matter what happens, and no matter how many trials you must go through, you are my lady and the one I wish to live out the rest of my days with. That has not, nor will it, changed.
no subject
[ She is aware that the outburst is very unlike her, but something deep inside demands that she make him aware of this. Her hands suddenly clamp down around his where the belts begin, ears pressed to her head, and eyes narrowed. Despite all her efforts, her lower lip trembles. ]
I don't wish to be anywhere else--not if it means leaving you behind. Al they do is ask of Thisru and I, ask and ask, pushing us so far! They don't consider the strain or the pain we endure... except Thisru is the strong one. The one they should truly call the Warrior of Light. No matter what, she pushes on, and carries on, while. I... I'm the one who broke... and they don't think a thing of it...
[ Her gaze falls to the floor in between them, a frown settled deep on her face. What might he do to ease her hurts? He does enough--more than enough--already to do that. Yet, there is one thing that she wishes to ask of him. One thing that is so incredibly unrealistic and they both are very much aware of it. Her forehead rests to his and her eyes close. Even knowing it, she cannot help the words coming out: ]
...don't let them take me away again.
no subject
Long as he thought that too much has been asked and required of them, and he has seen the proof of the wounds they have taken. The longer she speaks, he finds himself shaking his head with each word. ]
YYou are strong. You and your sister both are the strongest individuals that I know. After all, you carry so much... so much that we have unfairly placed upon you, and still you keep pressing forward. Yes, you press forward as well, Lantaa. You are every bit the Warrior of Light, and you are-
[ His voice falters as his emotions begin to spiral slightly out of his control, threatening to shatter the impassive expression he customarily wears. ]
I will not, no matter what reprisals may come my way. [ Their hands are already tightly clasped, but he curls his fingers further around hers as if to emphasize that he will not be letting her go, nor will he allow anyone to take her from him. ]
If I must speak to the Scions on your behalf and inform them that you will be staying, then I will.
/wraps this one up too
Her eyebrows draw together at the rare show of the emotions beneath the stoic mantle he wears. Alkaid curls against him, tucking herself against his chest and in his hold as if to apologize for her display. She nods to his declarations and shuts her eyes, hiding her face in his chest. She trust and believes in what he says; that he will not let any take her away from him in this moment. ]