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synthneon2025-06-10 12:40 am
bubblesong) wrote in synthneon2025-06-10 12:40 am
🫧 mcu/nikke ||
[ Little Mermaid slips quietly down the stairs into the glass doors of the workshop. Golden colored eyes scan the workshop, realizing that the lights are off. That alone is unusual for the ungodly early hours of the morning when it comes to the Malibu mansion, but also because there is no music.
Or sounds.
She can account for every car being in it's place from where she stands.
Her hand raises to unlock the door and she slips inside. Since the room is already quiet, she decides to not make any jarring noises if possible. Both hands quietly ease the door shut and she practically tiptoes through the usually loud and bustling workshop. Her hair is braided in an attempt to keep it from dragging on the floor, but yet it still manages to touch it with the ends regardless. ]
Uhmm... ooo.
[ The nervous hushed sounds come from her as she continues her tiptoeing search through the workshop. She's nervous to call out to the man she's looking for in case it startles him.
Everyone is aware that things haven't been the same since they returned from New York City those months ago. Little Mermaid had been overjoyed to return to the Malibu mansion, but made sure to keep the emotions to herself. Especially at seeing how rattled Tony Stark had been. Of course, he had been his usual abrasive, sarcastic, funny self, but they could all tell something was different. Rhodey tried to help when he could, but was brushed off. Pepper does what she can when she stops by after being at Stark Industries all day, but generally the conversations always break down into work and what not to do or what to do with the direction of the company.
She's wanted to help too. She's always wanted to help.
But, does someone like Tony Stark need her help? Does a hero like Iron Man who can fight along side people from other realities, spies, massive shapeshifting men, and even the original super soldier need her help? She's was designed to be a support not an attacker to her squad. The squad that was deemed such a failure it caused the Goddess of Victory project to come to a close. The squad that had been forced apart in their mission that was supposed to redeem them and rewrite their ending. She couldn't even take the hand of her dearest friend when her friend needed it the most. How could someone like Tony ever really need her help in anything?
That was why the comments from the interviewer had rattled her so much. She doesn't want to be a failure or just another woman that Pepper takes out of the house one day. She wants to be helpful, to have a place she belongs, to be more the failure she had been labeled. She wants to be special like Pepper is to him. Not the exact same, as one can never truly replace another, but she wants to be apart of his life.
Maybe one day she can truly earn the title of "Goddess of Victory" to someone.
Tony doesn't need a Goddess of Victory. He's his own maker of victories.
Little Mermaid stops at one of the work tables.
Then, she leans over it slightly.
Tony is sitting on the floor, pressed against the work table, breathing heavily and shaking.
She bites her lip to keep from saying his name in relief that she found him. Instead, she carefully and quietly, tiptoes around the side of the work table. Then, she moves down to be on her knees. She hasn't moved to be exactly next to him. There is still plenty of space to give him room. Her eyes drop to his shaking hands before looking back up at his face in what she can make out in the darkness. The light from his arc reactor is dimmed through his shirts, but she can at least make the outline out in the darkness.
Slowly, one hand reaches out to rest beside him. She hesitates with her fingers curling slightly. He hasn't reached out to her--should she even reach out to him first? ]
... Tony? [ Little Mermaid speaks in a whisper as to try and not startle him.
The notion isn't hard. There had been a time when that was all she could speak in. ]
Or sounds.
She can account for every car being in it's place from where she stands.
Her hand raises to unlock the door and she slips inside. Since the room is already quiet, she decides to not make any jarring noises if possible. Both hands quietly ease the door shut and she practically tiptoes through the usually loud and bustling workshop. Her hair is braided in an attempt to keep it from dragging on the floor, but yet it still manages to touch it with the ends regardless. ]
Uhmm... ooo.
[ The nervous hushed sounds come from her as she continues her tiptoeing search through the workshop. She's nervous to call out to the man she's looking for in case it startles him.
Everyone is aware that things haven't been the same since they returned from New York City those months ago. Little Mermaid had been overjoyed to return to the Malibu mansion, but made sure to keep the emotions to herself. Especially at seeing how rattled Tony Stark had been. Of course, he had been his usual abrasive, sarcastic, funny self, but they could all tell something was different. Rhodey tried to help when he could, but was brushed off. Pepper does what she can when she stops by after being at Stark Industries all day, but generally the conversations always break down into work and what not to do or what to do with the direction of the company.
She's wanted to help too. She's always wanted to help.
But, does someone like Tony Stark need her help? Does a hero like Iron Man who can fight along side people from other realities, spies, massive shapeshifting men, and even the original super soldier need her help? She's was designed to be a support not an attacker to her squad. The squad that was deemed such a failure it caused the Goddess of Victory project to come to a close. The squad that had been forced apart in their mission that was supposed to redeem them and rewrite their ending. She couldn't even take the hand of her dearest friend when her friend needed it the most. How could someone like Tony ever really need her help in anything?
That was why the comments from the interviewer had rattled her so much. She doesn't want to be a failure or just another woman that Pepper takes out of the house one day. She wants to be helpful, to have a place she belongs, to be more the failure she had been labeled. She wants to be special like Pepper is to him. Not the exact same, as one can never truly replace another, but she wants to be apart of his life.
Maybe one day she can truly earn the title of "Goddess of Victory" to someone.
Tony doesn't need a Goddess of Victory. He's his own maker of victories.
Little Mermaid stops at one of the work tables.
Then, she leans over it slightly.
Tony is sitting on the floor, pressed against the work table, breathing heavily and shaking.
She bites her lip to keep from saying his name in relief that she found him. Instead, she carefully and quietly, tiptoes around the side of the work table. Then, she moves down to be on her knees. She hasn't moved to be exactly next to him. There is still plenty of space to give him room. Her eyes drop to his shaking hands before looking back up at his face in what she can make out in the darkness. The light from his arc reactor is dimmed through his shirts, but she can at least make the outline out in the darkness.
Slowly, one hand reaches out to rest beside him. She hesitates with her fingers curling slightly. He hasn't reached out to her--should she even reach out to him first? ]
... Tony? [ Little Mermaid speaks in a whisper as to try and not startle him.
The notion isn't hard. There had been a time when that was all she could speak in. ]
no subject
He hears the whisper as she says his name quietly. Of course he knows that voice; of course he knows the sound of her walk, of her moving around. At some point, he memorized it, even though it hasn't been long since they met. Something about that quietness of her voice makes him want to recoil. Not push her away; he'd never do that. But he's never been good at being seen. Sure, he can be seen when he's performing, when he's acting like Tony Stark, genius billionaire playboy philanthropist, or whatever the hell he said once.
When he's not playing that part? Being seen is the last thing he wants. Well, actually, that's not true. He still likes being seen even when he's supposed to be "off".
This... this situation is not that.
You shouldn't see me like this. You shouldn't see me at all. No one should.
Tony doesn't speak out loud because his teeth are clenched too tightly right now to allow for speech. But he can still think, and God, he wishes he couldn't.
I know what this is. This isn't the part they put in the papers, on the headlines. Genius Tony Stark- that's easy. This... this is what makes people leave.
He leans his head back against the cold surface of the work table, eyes shifting to look up at the ceiling. That really doesn't help either, but he wasn't expecting it to.
It takes a second for him to find his voice, and a few more seconds to at least try to make it not sound so strained. ]
Hey, Ariel. Let me guess, I woke you up. Figures.
... Sorry.
no subject
[ It's not a lie. She doesn't truly need sleep to begin with, but her mind has been far too busy to sleep. Not with the way things have changed since New York and the conversation with the woman who invited herself into their dinner. Pepper had told her the woman was from "Variety Fair", some fancy magazine that did interviews and other things. The interviewer and Tony had a history--which simply just made her feel even smaller. Pailing in comparison.
She had come down, expecting to find Tony adjusting a suit. Building a new one. Doing anything other than the festivities that surround the decorations adorning the Malibu mansion. Decorations Pepper had insisted that go up for the season. Decorations that made Little Mermaid realize she hadn't celebrated Christmas--let alone any other holiday--in a very very long time.
Now that he has addressed her? She crawls the few extra spaces to sit next to him. Feet tuck underneath her and for a moment she says nothing. She doesn't move. She can recall seeing similar expressions on soldier's faces. The ones that had tried to stop Anachiro only to see their friends and brothers-in-arms cut down beside them.
Little Mermaid frowns. Maybe it's best not to ask Tony what really happened in New York.
Instead, a different approach.
One hand raises slowly so he can watch it in the dim ambient lighting of the workshop. She slowly lowers it, fingers gently sliding over his. Palm rests atop his hand before pressing the smallest amount of weight to it. Then, fingers curl to wrap around his. A part of her feels selfish, as if she shouldn't be trying to have the contact when he is in such a state, but this isn't just for her. She is trying to help him. ]
We should go out for breakfast. [ Amber eyes glance up at him, speaking still in her hushed voice. ] Later. once you're feeling better. Somewhere close and small. O-or, I could make something here for you. If going out is too hard.
no subject
The flickering workshop lights form patterns on the floor and walls and in a weird way, they highlight the things that Tony would just as soon hide: the dark circles under hsi eyes, the way his mouth tightens and goes slack again. He stares ahead, posture slouched in that way that says he didn’t so much as sit; he collapsed. Right now, he's not Tony Stark, genius. He's Tony Stark, a man held together by sheer momentum and a to-do list he keeps rewriting in his head at whatever ungodly hour this is. ]
You know, I used to build things down here because I wanted to. Now it feels more like I build things or I- I...
[ He can't finish that sentence. It's too vulnerable, too open, and while he's willing to open up to her, he just can't be that open right now. ]
You didn’t have to sit with me. Honestly, I wouldn’t blame you if you ran.
[ But then she suggests breakfast, and then he smiles. Sort of. It's too quick, too automatic, a little too mechanical. ]
Yeah... Yeah, we should do that. Breakfast. Later. Or now. Whatever. I'm good.
[ But it’s a lie, and he knows it. Still, he finds he can't tell her the truth, not yet. He can't put it into words that the idea of going out makes him feel like he's about to rattle out of his boots.
And there's the fact that the idea of sitting somewhere small and warm and safe, pretending he belongs in a world that still has things like pancakes and conversation? It feels like someone else's life. It doesn't feel like it belongs to him, at least not right now.
So he says yes, because it’s easier than explaining how wrong he actually feels right now. He figures she can see through it, though, which is why he intentionally keeps his gaze turned away, eyes looking anywhere but at her. Still, if she looks, if she insists on seeing him, she'll see the real truth in his eyes.
He doesn’t mean it. He’s not going. Not really. But he won’t fight her on it either. Instead, his fingers shift under hers, curling just a little. ]
no subject
Why she focuses on him and only him is far more personal and is a deeper feeling.
Her chest tightens and her breath catches silently in her throat. Her "heart" pounds. Others would say she is smitten as many other women are when it comes to the billionaire playboy philanthropist. "Smitten" isn't the word she would use to desribe it. That word needs to stay locked up inside otherwise he may truly push her out and tell her to leave.
He trails off and begins another thought. It isn't uncommon for him, but Little Mermaid can tell it's not his usual ramblings and his mind moving in so many different directions. No, he is avoiding something and doesn't want her to know what that might be. Maybe she hasn't earned the right to learn that knowledge--maybe it's only for those that have known him for years and years.
Tony smiles. He has his "press and big shot" smile. A smile he wears when he is smarter than everyone else in the room. Then, a gentler smile he shows her and Pepper. This smile isn't any of those smiles. It's wrong. The smile e gives is one she knows so very well... because she has worn it so much. A smile that makes people think it's okay when the world is farthest from being right.
Her fingers curl around his more once they shift.
Then, she moves.
Her hand pulls from his only so she can raise her arm to wrap around him. It guides him to rest his head against her bosum. Then, it rests against the side of his head, fingers gently moving to brush the strands of his short hair. Her other arm circles around him. By holding him maybe he can grasp the sort of escape he is looking for. An escape away from prying eyes and from the world itself.
She gently rests her cheek on the top of his head.
If he listens closely? He can even hear the gentle sound of her core. A hum instead of a traditional heartbeat. A sure sign to show she isn't human and never will be again. ]
... we were supposed to be the secondary team to help the Goddesses. The ones they could call in to help if they were overwhelmed. We would have deployed with them and fought to keep people safe from the sort of things that came through at New York. [ Her arms around her tighten slightly to show a secure hold. No one is coming to find them. ] ... they called us the "Old Tales", because we were named after fairytales too.
[ He knows some pieces of her story. Names. Fragments. Now, maybe he needs to know more. That way he knows he isn't alone in what he's struggling with. ]
We never fought at their side. We never had the chance. They gave us our first mission... and... [ a sound of discontent leaves her but she quickly pushes it down. Words right now. Not sounds. ] Cinderella was corrupted. She saw us but didn't see us. She attacked us, the facility, and all the people with us.
We failed before we even got to fight. They shut down the Goddess of Victory program. They--they labeled all of us as failures. Even after they brought Cinderella back to us. Even after we found out it was our own teammate that corrupted Cinderella. We tried to complete our mission even when they turned on us... and... we were separated. I don't know if they ever found the way to complete it.
[ A reason why she feels the way she does about him. He sees the girl that rushed out to join an experimental program to become a heroine. Someone like Captain America or the Goddess Squad. Someone to help everyone she ever met. The girl she can't remember. He still sees her as human.
She loves him for that. ]
I was so scared when Cinderella came back. [ Her voice is laced with so many emotions then: pain, regret. Her voice wavers more than usual. ] I was so scared that it wasn't really her; that it wasn't the teammate that I saw as my dearest friend. That she could still be the heretic that hurt me and everyone else. I was... she reached her hand out to me... and I couldn't take her hand. I pulled away... and left her hand reaching out to me.
[ She turns her head to press her nose against the top of his head. The arm wrapped around Tony drops and so that once more her fingers curl around his. The hold is secure, understanding, loving.
A small debate internally happens before she presses her lips to the top of his head. Her voice still wavers, but, there is an undertone of conviction with a decision made. ]
Even if you don't ever reach out to me? I'll hold your hand. I'll be right here holding you up. I'll hide you away so no one sees when things are bad.
So, please, don't pretend things are okay if they aren't. If you need me to look away so you can not be okay? I understand and I'll look away. But... but, I'll still hold your hand. Even when things are okay? I'll reach out.
no subject
He's breathing too fast and he feels like his skin is crawling and it's taking everything he has to just stay there listening to Little Mermaid talk. It's not her fault that he reacts like this, and he won't have her blaming herself, not even a little. And, well, her voice is calming. She's talking, but in a way, it's like a song. Didn't she say some people call her Siren? It fits, and not because she's like the mythical siren luring men in and trapping them. No, her voice is like a song, and it's helping relax Tony even if he doesn't feel very relaxed right now.
He thinks he should say something, should offer some kind of response to what she's saying about her past and the fates of Cinderella and the others on her squad. But whenever he opens his mouth to make some kind of comment, the words just seem to run away from him before he can properly grab hold of them.
Maybe it doesn't matter that he can't form words right now. Listening to Little Mermaid talk, Tony feels everything she's talking about. He feels her desperation, her fear, her sense that they failed... Maybe there's even loss in there too.
He shifts slightly so that he's closer to her, can hear more of that humming from her core. ]
You'll- you'll hide me away? [ He hates how his voice sounds; he hates how breathy it is, how afraid it is. He hates that she's seeing him like this, but he can't run from this either. ] Damn it, I can't hide from the things in my own head. That sounds so stupid when I hear myself say it.
[ It sounds stupid, but it's really how it feels. ]
I hate not knowing what to do about something.
[ He can't tinker these problems away. The panic attacks won't go away if he ignores them or if he tries to fix them so they're not problems anymore, and that seems to be what he hates the most. ]
no subject
She does.
He said once that he noticed her. Has he realized she notices him?
Her other hand curls around his hand more. Fingers trail along his. The small motions may not comfort him as much as she means them. He still breathes fast and the shake still exists in his hands. ]
I will. [ A firm nod. ] I may not be able to hide you from what thoughts torment you. I might not even be able to make those thoughts go away. I can make sure no one sees you.
That way you can deal with what is in your mind tormenting you with.
[ She once more gently presses her nose to the top of his head. She shifts so he can lean into her more as he wishes.
A long pause before she closes her eyes. ]
... Tony, [ her voice quivers slightly before she shifts to try and pull him closer, ] I know that something bad happened in New York. Something that the rest of us don't know. Something you lived that no one else must have. That's okay. I won't ask what happened... I won't make you live or see whatever it was again just to tell me. I don't want you to hurt because I asked.
[ Her head tilts to rest her cheek against his again. ]
I just wanted you to know that I noticed. Pepper and Rhodey see it. But, I noticed. [ Hopefully using the terminology he has used will make her point. ] I care about you. I care about your health so that you are able to be Iron Man. You can be not okay around me if things get to be too much.
[ Tony knowing she cares is enough. She doesn't expect anything in return. He has already made a place for her in his home and his life. Asking him to see how much she cares is far too much. Asking that she be special in a different way than Pepper is too much. As long as he doesn't tell her to leave one day because he's gotten bored with her, or because she is too kind and caring, or because he starts to notice someone else.
"I care" doesn't describe it entirely. If she uses the word she does feel? Then, he most likely will have her leave.
Little Mermaid falls quiet then. Her eyes close and she simply sits with him; holding him. Her core hums at a steady rhythmatic pace like a heartbeat but more mechanical. The pace of an energy source cycling almost like an arc reactor. ]
no subject
How did you get so damn good at reading the mess behind the curtain?
[ He still can't look at her, not yet. Soon, but not right this second. He keeps his eyes on the floor, and if she's looking, she might notice his hands are still trembling faintly, betraying everything he works so hard to keep locked down. He exhales through his nose, a sharp brittle sound. ]
Yeah. Something happened in New York. A lot of somethings. Big, loud, and very... space-shaped somethings. And ever since, it’s like... It's like there’s this reel running in the back of my brain and I can’t hit pause. Can’t sleep without seeing it. Can’t not hear it. But sure, I’ve got the haircut, the press releases, the shiny suits. If you wrap it all up in enough polish, maybe nobody sees the cracks underneath, right? That's what I keep telling myself.
Except you do. You see too much.
[ There’s no anger in the words. If anything, they’re almost reverent. His voice is quieter now, strained with a sincerity he’s not used to using. ]
How do you deal with all that? I'd crack up, if it was me.
[ He's not really expecting her to answer that question, so he continues: ]
You’re not asking me to fix it. You’re not waiting for me to snap out of it and go back to being the fun version of Tony Stark, the one who’s always on. You’re just... here.
[ He finally shifts, resting more against her like she offered. Not all the way, but enough that it counts. ]
I don’t know how to do this part. The being-seen part. I spent who knows how long trying to make sure no one ever looked too close, and if they did, they didn't see anything but what I wanted them to see. But you? You notice. You see. And you still want to stay.
no subject
This is a gentler and quieter time.
Something more like she is used to when it comes to expressing herself, her thoughts, her feelings.
He can probably feel how her head tilts away. Not so that she doesn't hear what he says, but to give him the privacy she can. He most likely isn't used to talking like this about these things to anyone... or at least not her. He deserves the respect needed to share some of what is holed up inside. Her fingernails keep brushing through what is still there of his hair after the haircut.
Then, he points out that she sees it--sees too much.
Little Mermaid tenses up immediately, eyes widening, preparing to be reprimanded or yelled at for saying that she had seen. Maybe she shouldn't have said it at all. She should have kept it to herself as she has done with so many other things. Except, he doesn't yell or give words tinted in anger. He simply moves onto the next question, then the next, hardly giving her the time to respond.
Her shoulders ease slightly and then even more as he shifts more into her hold. It takes another moment before she timidly squeezes his shaking hand again. Fingers gently stretch out to rest between his as a way to shelter his hand as well. ]
People can't turn off and on what hurts them the most. Wounds heals, but scars can still hurt. They can still bother you when you least expect them to... you're still Tony Stark even if you're hurting or scared or lonely. You're still Tony Stark even when you want to hole up and just work on projects endlessly. That's all apart of you. If someone doesn't like seeing the bad parts, how can they say they care?
[ She falls quiet for a moment before tilting her head once more, chin resting on top of his head. Amber eyes are still looking away from him to try and give him that privacy she feels he needs and wants. ]
I couldn't speak for a long time without activating my Kotodama... so I got used to watching everyone else around me. Seeing what they liked, what they didn't like. What made them smile and what made them mad. Trying to communicate in my own way that they were all precious to me and that I understood, even if they couldn't always understand me. I... got used to noticing little things. Hansel and Gretel were never apart. Abe adored Cinderella the most and always admired her. Cinderella worried she wasn't good enough like her heroes, but wanted to fight with them. Red Shoes--[ She abruptly stops at the name and falls immediately quiet.
Her hands curl around him suddenly, as if she is clutching onto a pillow or a stuffed animal after a bad dream. It isn't as scary as what aliens or monsters he saw in New York City, but it is the only thing she has that might explain she understands. ] NIKKEs don't need to sleep a lot in a technical sense... but sometimes I avoid it too. I know sometimes when I try to sleep that I'll see the Cinderella that isn't Cinderella looking at me. That I try to stop her with my Kotodama and she grabs me... a-and then she hits my jaw. Again, and again, and again, and again... a-and again... until it's not there and I can't...
[ Little Mermaid shuts her eyes and forces the tears away. Now isn't the time to share everything about her past. He doesn't need to see her own cracks right now. Once he's feeling more like himself. If he asks. She's certain he won't want to know more, as he's never pushed deep into her story. ]
... do you want me to look away more?
no subject
Don’t go doing that thing. The pulling away thing. I know, I'm a hypocrite because I pull away a lot, but- Damn it, I'm bad at this.
[ He shifts, not fully looking at her but not pulling back either. One hand brushes against hers where she’s holding on. The touch is light. Careful, and maybe a little bit nervous. ]
You see too much? Yeah, well. Guess someone had to. I think I always wanted someone who could see. [ He exhales, the sound short, almost like a laugh but without humor. His gaze drifts, fixed on nothing. The air between them holds more than what’s said. ]
Most people look right past the mess. Or pretend it’s not there. You're not like most people. That's a good thing.
[ His fingers twitch slightly, then settle more deliberately over hers in a way that's still tentative, still braced like he expects her to let go any second. ]
You’ve got this way of saying the kind of stuff that matters without turning it into a therapy session. That’s rare. I don’t usually... [ He cuts himself off, jaw tightening. That’s already too much. He tries to play it off with a shrug of his shoulder. ]
Between you and me, sometimes I still feel like I never left the cave. Or like I'm still falling through that portal in New York, waiting to hit something. Or waiting to- Never mind.
[ He doesn’t elaborate. Maybe he doesn’t have to, or maybe she wants him to. He might, if he feels like it. Either way, the memories sit there, heavy and sharp, just under the skin. ]
You notice stuff. Little stuff. And I guess I’m not used to that meaning something good. [ He clears his throat. Not because he needs to; he's just buying time. ] Anyway, don’t look away. Or do, if you want. Whatever.
[ He pauses. Then, softer, almost like he doesn’t mean for it to be heard... ]
I think I’d notice if you did.
no subject
[ Her hand curls around his again, fingers slipping in between his, holding his hand securely. The grip isn't tight but more filled with reaffirmation and care. He's reached out and she'll always reach back and take his hand. She said as much, but now she is proving it with her actions. People always say things to Tony. She wants to show him that she means everything she says.
He doesn't comment on what she has shared. Truthfully? She hadn't expected him to really say anything on it during this moment. Tony is someone who files information he finds important away and then brings it up at a point he thinks is relevant. If he never brought it up that would be fine with her as well. As long as he listened and remembers. ]
Uhmm... I don't think you'd like a therapy session. [ She tries lightly to flex his sort of humor into the conversation.
Then, she squeezes his hand she holds gently once more. He doesn't need to keep sharing if he feels that it is too much. She understands. ]
When those times happen? I'll lead you out of the cave. I'll catch you when you feel like you keep falling. I promise.
[ Little Mermaid tilts her head down once more. Lips gently brush against the top of his head once more to leave barely a kiss. She shifts with him, making sure to angle herself so that if someone else were to walk in that she would be the first one they see. She promised to hide him and she's going to make sure she does her best to keep that promise.
She'll also keep noticing.
She falls quiet for a long moment. Then, the hand on top of his head trails down to rest on his shoulder. A gentle rub is given before she decides to offer another suggestion. Something that is closer to what he usually does. Especially if he can't fix his suits at the moment. ]
If you're feeling better... uhmm... [ the hand on his shoulder stretches out and a small bubble forms at her finger tips, ] You asked a while ago to look into my bubbles.
[ It was his birthday. She remembers it all perfectly, but, that isn't quite the point she is trying to make. ]
no subject
Between you and me, if- if this is your version of a therapy session, I think I’m good with it, believe it or not.
[ When she shifts, angling herself in front of him like a shield, he doesn’t call attention to it. It seems like the action is natural to her, but it feels natural to him too, like this is something they've done for a long time, even though they haven't known each other for a long time.
But then she refers to something that he asked her once, and he looks at her with some surprise. ]
You remembered that? Uh... [ He's a little surprised that she remembered, that what he said back then hadn't just faded into memory and been replaced by other things. ]
Uh, yeah, I did want to look into them, if that offer's still on the table.
no subject
How long have they known each other? It wasn't long before the Battle of New York... and then it was his birthday after that. Now, it's Christmas. Maybe almost a year? Time is odd to her as she finds herself sometimes still being surprised she can see a clock. Sometimes she simply goes and stands out on the balcony and watches the sunrise as if she hasn't seen it in years.
Her smile widens just a fraction at how he is surprised. That's a good sign. It means he's pulling more back into his normal rhythm instead of shaking. He's calming down. That's what is important. ]
Huh huh. [ A small nod against the top of his head. She tilts her head up and back to look down at him as he looks up at her. ] Of course I remember!
[ She remembers everything they've done. She remembers seeing the silhouette of his suit for the first time and how vibrant the gold and red was in the low lit facility. She remembers the first time he had her help with anything in the workshop and showing him the power of her kotodama--even the little bubble with the colors of his suit on it. She remembers their dance on his birthday in perfect detail and how truly happy he was... which is the farthest thing from how he is at the moment. Tony doesn't need to be happy all the time, but, part of her worries she might not see him smile like that again.
The bubble formed at her fingertip is a small clear one. It floats a just a little ways away, the sparkles in it reflecting off the low light, before almost fizzling out. She didn't mean for it to last long anyways. ]
It's always "on the table"! If you're not feeling good enough to do it now? We can later. [ Little Mermaid simply wanted to give him the option to put his mind to something else. Except, she realizes now that he might be exhausted from the emotions and clear anxiety his body has gone through. ] Maybe, for now, you should get some rest for a few hours...? Then, I can help you with my bubbles or with what you were doing with your suits!
[ If he isn't working on something with clean energy, he's working on something with his suits. She loves watching him work. There is a small sense of nostalgia with it, but, it's more because she can tell how much he loves making things. Creating. Building. It shows in all the movements he makes and anything he crafts. Even the robot arms he keeps threatening to dismantle he cares for.
Little Mermaid smiles to herself once more before hugging him tightly. Maybe she can tell those things one day. How much she loves to watch him work, how she feels a sense of awe and somehow pride when he is saving people in his suits. How he's taught her to live again and enjoy living, not just surviving or being afraid of stepping outside. How she... how she really does love him.
Tony Stark. ]
If you want? You can rest right here for a few hours. I can make something for you to lay down on with my bubbles.
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You know, Ariel, you're not like anyone I've ever met before. Most people wouldn't be telling me "Oh, it's okay, take your time. You can do that really important pressing thing you have to do later." Most people expect me to just be constantly going, not stopping for anything, and, well, I can't blame them, can I? When do I ever stop?
[ He knows his words are closer to rambling than he would like, but that's also something he tends to do at times: mostly times when he's alone and the only ones listening are JARVIS and his suits. ]
I'm surprised you're not telling me "Tony Stark, pull yourself together", instead of saying- Well.
[ He looks down for a brief second before his glance moves back to meet hers. ]
I've never been good at resting. [ And then he tilts his head sideways a fraction, not wanting to dislodge her from him or vice versa. ] Hold on, did you just say "lie down on your bubbles"? [ The look he's giving her is curious now, not rattled or shaken, but genuinely, openly curious. ]
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She knows now why what the interviewer had said bothers her so much. At first she thought it was because she had nowhere else to go that wasn't back into S.H.I.E.L.D. That she was afraid of being alone again in the world after finally being able to see it again for the first time in so long. Those are some of the reasons, but not really the real reason. Did the lady from "Vanity Fair" say it because she noticed? Did Little Mermaid give too much away when Tony got up from the table too quickly and made his way back to the bathrooms? How obvious was it to the woman that she loves Tony? It had to be the reason those things were said, because, it's the real reason she's afraid Tony will send her away.
Now, she's afraid if she does say it? He'll send her away.
Being a close friend? A confidant? That's enough... especially since she's not human. Not really anymore. ]
You have to stop sometime--even for a little bit. Twenty minutes. [ Worry seeps into her tone then. Abe always made sure they had breaks. ] That way you can keep going longer! I thought that was normal... and obvious?
[ Maybe it's not? ]
Aah, yes! [ She nods quickly as if to further communicate if her words failed.
The small quiet smile takes over her face then and becomes more. She can't help but be excited to show what she can do--what her bubbles can do. How much she has been able to control them.
Not only that, but how Tony seems to have recovered enough from what she thinks is an anxiety attack. He's not shaking and his mind has focused on something that isn't New York City. Good! He might be able to find some rest even for a moment or two.
She squeezes his hand again and almost kisses the top of his head once more. Except, he's looking at her, and if he sees her do it? Then, he might question why. They'd get close to the territory that would have him tell her to leave. So, she instead gently hugs him again before letting go.
Little Mermaid crawls to be in front of him, but a few spaces of distance away. Her hands come together in front of her in the shape of a sphere, and one of her traditional pink glitter bubbles appears. Her hands then direct the bubble to the ground and it begins to spread out like a mattress. She adds more to it through her fingertips to "fluff" it up. Then, once she's satisfied with her work? She nods to herself and him. ]
Go ahead! [ The braid she's styled her hair in slips over her shoulder. It's thick, and the teal parts still seem to glow and pulse. ] They won't burst or break. They're soft and warm too. Almost like a water bed!
[ They won't pop or break. Just like she won't. It can handle his weight and she can handle the weight of anything he gives her. ]
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He should say something; a joke about glitter, maybe. He could make a crack about water beds being a fire hazard in a lab, but one thing he's figured out about Mermaid is that she takes things literally sometimes. He makes wisecracks easily, but now he's figuring out that he has to pick what he says carefully, in case she does take it literally. He already made a mental note to himself that his goal is to somehow get her to relax.
For now, though, he glances at her, noting the little details about her: the subtle shimmer of teal running through her braid, at the way she keeps a bit of space between them as she works. He just watches her place one bubble at a time until she eventually nods to herself and to him as well, declaring her work finished.
He stands up slowly, approaching the newly formed bubble bed. ] First time for everything, right? [ He can't remember the last time he slept on a water bed, or if he ever did at all, but this looks a million times better than a water bed.
He places a hand on it experimentally before he slowly slides onto the bed and moves around until he's comfortable. Once he does, he just lies there for a moment, allowing himself to relax (a foreign sensation, really), and for the first time in who knows how long, he feels like he's not bracing himself for something.
But then he turns his head sideways to look at her, and he adds: ] This is cheating, you know. [ He knows he should be careful with his jokes, but this is one he can't pass up. ] I was gonna pull an all-nighter and knock out some projects I've been meaning to finish, but then you came along with comfort and a bubble bed. How's a guy supposed to say no to that?
[ She might notice how his eyes have softened, sort of, the look in them warm and yes, even relaxed, and then he says: ]
Thanks.
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Then, she sits besides the mattress with her hands in her lap, waiting for his reaction. Critique. Instead, he relaxes. It takes her aback for a brief moment as she's not certain she has ever seen him relax entirely. There are times when he is calm and simply enjoying the moment, but this is certainly more than that. A small satisfied giggle comes out towards herself at it. Well. She did a good enough job then. ]
Aou? [ The confused sound comes from her very briefly before he continues. Then, a gentle laugh, not a giggle. ] Well, now you can rest for a few hours and then stay up all day and the night after! And, if you want? I can help with the projects too! That way they finish faster and you can do more.
[ Her smile turns fond--loving at him then. How much he can see in the low light is one thing. He may not even catch the entire meaning of the emotions behind the smile either in the state he's in. That's okay. He doesn't really need to understand them all as he most certainly doesn't feel the same way. ]
You're welcome. [ Little Mermaid nods once more in satisfaction. ] Even if you don't sleep and just rest? That's okay. You'll feel better soon!
[ And in the mean time she can get her little bubbles to help clean up all the pieces of ... metal and whatever else there is laying around. ]
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He's just thinking that a bed like this is more enjoyable with two people on it, and, well, he's not 100% sure but it looks like there's a decent bounce to the thing, so.... ]
Believe it or not, I think I'm feeling better already. And you know who I have to thank for that? [ He points at her with his free hand. ]
You know, I honestly can't remember every having a sleepover with another kid growing up. That's probably because little kids didn't want to hang around me or something like that, or maybe something about hey, don't touch that! is a turn-off for kids. Yeah, that was probably it.
[ He shakes his head; part of him wishes he could ask his parents about his growing-up years because parts of it are a blur to him and it's not like there's a photo album he can open and look at. Maybe one existed once, but he has no idea where it might be now. ]
How about it? You up for a sleepover with me? And that's not an innuendo. [ Unless she wants it to be, of course, but Tony's just looking for company here, not fooling around. For once. ]
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Ah... that's it, isn't it? Why he pushes himself without sleep ever since New York.
She not only sits beside him on the impromptu bubble mattress, but she lays down beside him on her side. Her head rests against his arm. A quietness takes over her as she asks his questions and rambles on about a lost experience from his childhood. A hand slowly raises and rests on the top of his chest. The tips of her fingers barely press against the fabric that thinly covers his arc reactor. ]
Of course I'll sleep beside you. [ As, she figures that is what he is truly asking for just with different words. ] We're magnets, aren't we? Whenever you want me to? Just let me know.
[ Then, her tone changes. Something more serious but holding that gentleness she somehow always has. ] Tony. It's okay if you stop for a few hours.
We're safe now. [ Her head tilts further against his arm and makes certain not to break eye contact. ] I'm safe. Right here, with you, in the workshop.
[ She could continue on about how JARVIS would let them know if something was wrong. Though, now she realizes the AI has been rather silent this whole time. She could mention how the portal closed and how there's been nothing to come from space since New York. Those words would be pointless to share as it would water down the point she is trying to make to him. ]
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In his mind, it's a little embarrassing how quickly he relaxes as soon as she sits beside him and then lies down next to him, resting her head on his arm. He's never been interested in sentimental things like security blankets or stuffed animals from when he was a kid, and of course, Little Mermaid is a person, not an object. She's not a security blanket, and Tony doesn't need her to fall asleep (at least that's what he tells himself), but he can't pretend he doesn't feel calmer when she's around. ]
Okay, so... It's not "my bed" anymore. It's "our bed", and anytime you want to use it, it's there. [ As in, I always want you to sleep beside me, but I don't know exactly how to say it. ]
Is it okay, though? [ His expression turns serious and that familiar tension in his jaw returns. ] Threats don't go away on a schedule. They don't wait for us to be ready to deal with them. We need to... I need to be ready, and- [ He scrubs his face with his free hand. ]
I'm not even close. [ She's already seen more of him than most have, having seen the things he tries so hard to keep locked up beneath the exterior of being confident and collected and prepared. But right now, he feels like he's anything but prepared. He's anything but confident. If anything, he's scared. ]
I need to do more to make sure you stay safe.
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It hangs in the air for a moment before she responds by leaning against him futher. She hadn't expected it to impact her as it did. He said they were a couple during their first (and only) dance. She thought maybe he was humoring her or that it was only for his birthday, but, now she is realizing how serious he meant the comment then.
The tension comes to his jaw and that is the sign for her that the assumption had been correct. He's scared, and doesn't feel safe, and feels like he can't stop until he feels safe again. He needs not only comfort and to feel safe, but, she needs to do more to show him she can fight if needed. Her bubbles are also a weapon and she has combat skills. She can fight beside him if he needs her too.
His sincerity is also obvious for her to see. He doesn't want to keep her safe because she's incapable...he cares.
She raises her hand, gently guiding his head to turn and look at her. Little Mermaid pushes herself up on her arm in order to hover over him slightly, hair cascading almost like a waterfall around them. Enough to hide them from the world, the suits, anything else that might try to look in on them. ]
Then, I'll help make sure you're ready. We'll make your suits better and work with your teammates to be ready. [ She gives him a smile. ] You're not alone, Tony... we're a couple.
[ She presses a kiss to the top of his head again, expecting him to brush her off. ]
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Yeah, we're a couple. Which- [ Look, sometimes he does his best thinking when he's trying to not think about something else. ] About that... I'm thinking it's about time we make it official, 'cause, correct me if I'm wrong here, but you're not ready for it to be public knowledge, are you? That's totally fine, by the way. I don't mind. Besides, isn't it more special if it's just our secret for awhile longer?
[ He smiles for the first time in awhile, and it's an actual genuine smile. ]
It's our secret, and the world has no idea about it. It's ours, something that belongs to only us. I was thinking the other day about it: rings. That's a couple thing, right? And I figure you don't even have to put it on your finger if you don't want to.
[ He eyes her carefully, consideringly. ] How about a ring on a chain? Easily hidden under clothes. I'm still plotting out designs, but I think I've got a good idea.
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Her smile widens at the sight of his. It's his real smile--not the charming one he gives to the public and press. The one that is truly Tony Stark.
Then, his questions fully register in her mind. ]
Aoou... I-I thought you would want it to be a secret because of everything else the press sees... [ Though, if he had wanted it to be public? She wouldn't mind. The public doesn't really know her, but, they would know that Tony is with her. Then, maybe, people like Vanity Fair... ] Ah! Rings?
[ Rings...
Like, being engaged?
Are they? If they're sharing a room now...
A ring for Tony...
An idea comes to mind. It is one of those that takes root and won't let go. Rings. She could make a ring for him. Something unique and not like any other ring in a store or a shop. A design that would be just for Iron Man. ]
Oooh.... [ She blinks a few times. ] I'd wear it on my finger. If we go out and people see it? They don't need to know! It'd still be our secret.
You would really want to give me a ring?
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Tony would just wave his hand and blow off what just happened, but not around Little Mermaid. ]
The press? [ He shakes his head. ] If they want to find something out, they're going to. But- [ He grins a little wider now, as if something is amusing him. ] If I don't want them finding out something, I have some tricks up my sleeve, believe it or not. The point is, if you don't want them knowing about us, we can keep it that way.
[ Just because Tony knows how to schmooze the press and play their stupid games doesn't mean Little Mermaid needs to be caught up in it too. ]
But yeah, rings. I know, this isn't how people usually do it. [ What's "it", anyway? Engagement? A promise of commitment? He's pretty well committed to her and he knows it. If it was an engagement ring, he wouldn't have just sprung it casually on her, or would he? ]
Really? I guess I thought that you'd want to keep it out of the public eye, but you know what? I'm kind of glad to hear that you don't. Really. Look, I really don't think I'm being a braggart when I say that I want the world to know about us. Well, maybe not the whole world, maybe just this city. But the point is, I want people to know you let me be with you.
[ Because as far as he's concerned, he's lucky. More than lucky, really. Little Mermaid could've said no to his advances, but here they are, together. ]
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She gives a nervous smile. Of course she is nervous of having the public eye on her. Even though S.H.I.E.L.D. has yet to try and take her away? It doesn't change the fear and worry that they will. If she puts herself out there more... what if it increases the odds that Natasha and Clint will show up at the door when Tony is gone and take her away? It doesn't make the most logical sense, but, fears are usually irrational. ]
O-okay. [ She nods, clearly trying to push herself out of her comfort zone. ] How... how did you want to announce it to everyone in the city?
[ The press and the public is part of being with Tony. He is a public figure, super hero or the face of Stark Industries. She will have to get used to the idea of being scrutinized or being theorized about. Just like everyone does to him.
The nervous smile remains even as she kisses the top of his head again. He hasn't turned down the motion yet, so... ]
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The thought's been knocking itself around in his mind, but it's gradually taking shape into an idea: if he has to leave for any reason and Little Mermaid stays behind, he'll set up security details so that no one can just walk into the house and take her away. JARVIS is already a good first line of defense; it won't take much tinkering for Tony to get the security settings to how he wants them so that Little Mermaid can feel safe in their house. ]
Well, I wasn't going to call up a reporter, if that's what you mean. There's always functions happening, and people who are looking for a charitable donation from Stark Industries. We could easily show up at some fancy dinner wearing shoes that pinch and announce it that way.
There's always people hanging around those things looking for stories to write about. Tony Stark's latest flame, except you're more than that. You're not someone here for one night only.
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While she's not certain about the shoes and pinching? The idea of announcing it at a dinner or charity lights her eyes up. While not small by any means, it is far better than the red carpet affairs or the large parties for the high class socialite. It's something more personal to the things in the city and their direct loves versus being a superhero.
Then, the comment of being more than the latest flame of Tony Stark.
He always says he notices her, and she wonders then if he had noticed how much the questions and prodding from Christine at Vanity Fair had undermined her. She had thought Tony hadn't picked up on it given everything he has been dealing with. Maybe he had noticed it to simply file away commenting on it when the moment was right.
One hand slips from the back of his head down his shoulder and chest. Her fingers rest comfortably against the arc reactor. The tips gently move along the fabric that creates the thin barrier. A small touch to try and connect directly to him and through all the thoughts and paths his mind takes at any moment. ]
It couldn't be "our bed" if I was only here for one night. [ Her humor is nowhere near as witty or sharp as his, but, she feels as if she can navigate a similar path now. ] I like the idea of going to a party with you and telling everyone that way.
[ Then, one of her customary sounds slips out. ] Oooh! It's Christmas soon. There might be a lot of parties!
[ Her smile spreads into that fond loving one she gives. The one that she hopes communicates how deeply she truly loves him. She'd tell him if she thought he wouldn't rebuke the notion. She would kiss him if she didn't think it would be the wrong time--even if she truly wishes to make the motion.
Instead, she pulls him closer wirh the hand still at the back of his head.
I love you, Tony. ]
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It's just how he'll do that that he's still figuring out. ]
You know what, good point. [ He grins widely at her, both because what she said makes perfect sense and also because he definitely wants her here for every night, as long as she wants to be here. ] So how about it? This is your home too now. [ And the thought occurs to him that she might want to decorate, or go shopping for clothes or toiletries or anything she needs to feel at home. ]
Yeah, it's almost Christmas. There's bound to be parties popping up all the time, and the odds are good that invites will start coming in. [ Probably. Assuming that people still want Tony Stark showing up at their events. He can't imagine why that would abruptly change, unless of course they think he wouldn't bother showing up at all. But still, if things remain as they have been, he expects the usual Christmas fundraisers and charity galas to still be on the schedule right up till Christmas and going on during New Year's. ]
We're gonna need to find you a nice dress. [ But then she smiles fondly and he can see how she's looking at him even as she pulls him closer to her.
Well, she's got me hook, line, and sinker, and I don't have a problem with that at all.
And, as if to further illustrate how little of a problem he has with this, he angles himself just slightly so that he can lean in to attempt brushing a kiss against the side of her face. ]
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Besides, the mansion has been her home for months now. JARVIS and the mechanical arms, Pepper and Rhodey when they stop by. They are all apart of the life and home that make up Tony's mansion. A life she feels eternally grateful to even have after the life she has led so far. She has people around her who see her as a person and not just a NIKKE. A place to call home. Hopefully... if her squad is still alive... they have lives like this too. ]
Okay! I'll move everything in the morning. [ If they're sharing a room her clothes should be in the same closet. Right? Unless he only wants to share the bed. Really, all she has is the clothes. ] Wherever you want me to put them. It was your room to start with! I don't want to push you out...
Mmm. Christmas... [ A thoughtful expression crosses her face then. A rare look inside of the parts she keeps hidden away from everyone. She was trapped for at least forty years. She missed so many Christmases. How different is it now? ] You should pick the party we go to! I don't really know anyone or which ones would be good outside of the obvious ones like supporting local law enforcement...
I can ask Pepper to help if she has time after work! That way it's a surprise. [ Her tone implies this is exactly what she is going to be doing. ] And, I need to get you a present too.
[ She already has an idea on what she wants to do--his ring. Now, it's trying to get him out of the workshop to make it. She feels as if any ring in a shop just won't do. It won't fit Tony because he's so unlike anyone else in the world. At least, that is how she feels.
Her inner thoughts come to a stop once he kisses the side of her face. She instantly turns a slight shade of pink. He's not much of a person who shows affection physically, unless the mood strikes him or he can show off to some degree. It's why she never really moves to kiss him or do more than hugging him and holding his hand.
Her characteristic aoou slips out with a fond embarrassment slipping into her voice. Then, a soft giggle follows. She turns enough in order to give him a quick but fond kiss on the lips. ]