... okay. [ She looks back at him with the frown on her face. Worried. She imagines Alan won't want to have much to do with any of it. He won't like how scientific the approaches are. She imagines it'll only stress him more. How much more can he handle? ] I'll talk to her when I go into the Oldest House after tomorrow.
[ Jesse's look softens. Shoulders curl slightly. She doesn't deserve it because so much of things are her fault. Dylan being captured and treated the way he was. The Slide Projector being in the hands of the Bureau. The Hiss. Even... even the amount of loops has to be in part to her own fault. How can it not be? She forced the story to go her way. They could of solved it so much quicker if she hadn't been so insistent... ]
I'm not blameless in anything. [ No further comment is made. The tone of guilt is clear enough in her voice. ] We're two people who have been messed up by otherworldly forces. Being not-normal is... that's enough. More than enough. Even if there are struggles sometimes.
Unintentionally wouldn't matter. Ordinary was screwed up enough. I wouldn't want to cause that to break down too. I'm sure she wouldn't either. [ A sharp inhale and a tilt of her head back into the pillow. Red hair frames her face, coming down slightly over the shoulder that he doesn't lean into. ] I doubt you or the other version of you would let us disappear without a trace.
[ Her gaze softens and she looks away from him. A small frown appears. Clearly, it's not just a thought that her other self has. She feels unable to measure up to Alice. She's sure that Alice Wake would have been able to help with his night terrors--his inability to eat, or sleep, or step outside. Alan had only spun out because of a source outside their marriage. If she was still there then she could of helped Alan so much more than what Jesse is able to do for him.
« I'm not even good at comforting. » ]
It's not that easy though, is it? Just being ourselves. Having an alien resonance that talks to us in our heads. Not knowing the best way to help or be normal in a relationship... when you need it. When he might need it.
[ A sigh of frustration before she waves her free hand as if to dismiss the thoughts and conversation. She doesn't want to talk about it. She doesn't want him to know how she feels inferior to help him if it's not in the realm of weird. That isn't for him to deal with. That's her shit. He has enough on his plate.
Her hand wraps around the remote again. A few more notches down, but the LEDs are still on.
She rests her cheek at the top of his head and just closes her eyes. ] We'll figure it out.
no subject
[ Jesse's look softens. Shoulders curl slightly. She doesn't deserve it because so much of things are her fault. Dylan being captured and treated the way he was. The Slide Projector being in the hands of the Bureau. The Hiss. Even... even the amount of loops has to be in part to her own fault. How can it not be? She forced the story to go her way. They could of solved it so much quicker if she hadn't been so insistent... ]
I'm not blameless in anything. [ No further comment is made. The tone of guilt is clear enough in her voice. ] We're two people who have been messed up by otherworldly forces. Being not-normal is... that's enough. More than enough. Even if there are struggles sometimes.
Unintentionally wouldn't matter. Ordinary was screwed up enough. I wouldn't want to cause that to break down too. I'm sure she wouldn't either. [ A sharp inhale and a tilt of her head back into the pillow. Red hair frames her face, coming down slightly over the shoulder that he doesn't lean into. ] I doubt you or the other version of you would let us disappear without a trace.
[ Her gaze softens and she looks away from him. A small frown appears. Clearly, it's not just a thought that her other self has. She feels unable to measure up to Alice. She's sure that Alice Wake would have been able to help with his night terrors--his inability to eat, or sleep, or step outside. Alan had only spun out because of a source outside their marriage. If she was still there then she could of helped Alan so much more than what Jesse is able to do for him.
« I'm not even good at comforting. » ]
It's not that easy though, is it? Just being ourselves. Having an alien resonance that talks to us in our heads. Not knowing the best way to help or be normal in a relationship... when you need it. When he might need it.
[ A sigh of frustration before she waves her free hand as if to dismiss the thoughts and conversation. She doesn't want to talk about it. She doesn't want him to know how she feels inferior to help him if it's not in the realm of weird. That isn't for him to deal with. That's her shit. He has enough on his plate.
Her hand wraps around the remote again. A few more notches down, but the LEDs are still on.
She rests her cheek at the top of his head and just closes her eyes. ] We'll figure it out.