outlierdirector: ▮ <lj user="outlierdirector">. (even▸murmur of voices.)
ᴊᴇssᴇ ғᴀᴅᴇɴ | ᵗʰᵉ ᵈᶦʳᵉᶜᵗᵒʳ. ([personal profile] outlierdirector) wrote in [community profile] synthneon 2024-01-26 04:30 am (UTC)

[ Jesse hardly sees it as a matter if the Alan Wake she knows would be supportive or not. For her, it's more a matter if she should even open herself to that degree. It wouldn't matter if the Alan Wake she knew was a Saint or the asshole the media says he is. Trusting people is simply difficult--almost too difficult.

« His Jesse and Polaris are the lucky ones no matter if he's lucky too. They found someone to trust. Someone that believes them. The Alan we know... he hasn't said he doesn't... but that won't mean he will try to ignore the hole behind the poster when the Dark Presence is dealt with.

That's what everyone does.

Why would he be any different? He's famous, and we will have saved his wife by the end. If it'sa story? They should live happily ever after with the monster slain. I'm... just the side kick.

Why would he pick me over his wife? He shouldn't. They're not divorced. They have a chance...
»

She presses her forehead to her knees again. Should she really tell him? ]


Okay.

[ « Why am I agreeing to this? »

A shake of her head that he can't see. ]
I didn't mean like that... I meant...

[ A few more tears role down her face. She wishes it was as simple of being jealous or envious of her other self. She's happy for the Jesse this Alan seems to know. She's found someone to believe in. Jesse, on the other hand, simply feels she won't find that person or that place. Maybe that's for the best too. Even though she knows it's not, otherwise the idea of her Alan leaving wouldn't upset her so much. ]

She hasn't let you go even if you're somewhere else. [ Jesse hates how her voice is filled with emotions. How obvious it is that she's crying. ] She'll find you because we don't let go of what little we have... after Ordinary... and having someone in our world is too important to let go.

[ She manages to suppress the sound that wants to burst out from her. No, it's bad enough she's crying to a stranger on a telephone call. No breaking down.

« I don't want to go through this alone. I don't want to be alone anymore. But... they don't... »]


You're too important for her to let go.

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