[ The truth of it all is that he's never doubted how she feels. Never wondered if she cared. Even if she can't find the words to use to tell him how she feels, he knows. He knows she loves him and that she cares, and considering the opposition he's faced and the length of time that he's been trying everything he can to escape the Dark Place, it means everything to him that she cares. All he wants is to fix the story that's gotten so terribly messed up, to set things right for the people who were dragged in against their will.
He never meant for any of this to happen; he never meant for Saga to be swept up in it, or to have her family threatened by the darkness. Casey wasn't supposed to be drawn into the story either, and whether or not the two FBI agents were pulled in because of Alan or because the Dark Place took control and wrote the story instead of him, he won't let himself dodge what is clearly his responsibility to fix.
But he'd be lying if he said that the support and care Jesse's given him is part of what's keeping him going. She doesn't have to even actively help with fixing the story. Just being there with him like she has helps. After all, he's awake now because of her. He's certain he wouldn't have achieved that on his own.
He feels he has to thank her, but how can he do that? He kisses her again, leaning into it with all the strength he can manage, because it's not just that he wants to kiss her. He wants to be the pillar of strength for her too, even though, more often than not, he's hardly in the position to be anything resembling strength. Maybe when he's fighting off Taken, but what about the rest of the time?
It's hard to explain why he feels inadequate when compared to Jesse, but- those feelings remain however hard he tries to shake them off. So instead of dwelling on them, he circles his arms around her and tries to summon up enough strength to pull her in, closer to him. He doesn't trust himself yet to not topple over if she leans against him too much, but he wants to at least try. ]
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He never meant for any of this to happen; he never meant for Saga to be swept up in it, or to have her family threatened by the darkness. Casey wasn't supposed to be drawn into the story either, and whether or not the two FBI agents were pulled in because of Alan or because the Dark Place took control and wrote the story instead of him, he won't let himself dodge what is clearly his responsibility to fix.
But he'd be lying if he said that the support and care Jesse's given him is part of what's keeping him going. She doesn't have to even actively help with fixing the story. Just being there with him like she has helps. After all, he's awake now because of her. He's certain he wouldn't have achieved that on his own.
He feels he has to thank her, but how can he do that? He kisses her again, leaning into it with all the strength he can manage, because it's not just that he wants to kiss her. He wants to be the pillar of strength for her too, even though, more often than not, he's hardly in the position to be anything resembling strength. Maybe when he's fighting off Taken, but what about the rest of the time?
It's hard to explain why he feels inadequate when compared to Jesse, but- those feelings remain however hard he tries to shake them off. So instead of dwelling on them, he circles his arms around her and tries to summon up enough strength to pull her in, closer to him. He doesn't trust himself yet to not topple over if she leans against him too much, but he wants to at least try. ]