synthneon | FF PSL | ❝ two-toned echoes tumbling through time. ❞

I must say that traveling alongside you would be a pleasure: to see places I have only heard of and to be at your side? I might begin to think that I am merely dreaming. If it were possible for me to do so right at this very moment, I would go with you without hesitation.

[ Once her touch travels down from his hair to his neck and then to the middle of his shoulders, he stills beneath her touch. The scarred areas are healed and not particularly sensitive anymore (with the exception of the location of the stab wound), but his mind fills in the gaps for him, bringing to mind the memory of how he sustained those wounds, no matter how long ago it was. They are hardly unique, as so many Temple Knights were injured or worse during the long war, and like every knight who sustained injury, the scars tell a story and paint a picture.

But he finds that when he is with her, he does not wish to dwell upon his hurts, whether physical or of the mind. He wishes only to be present with her, to feel her love through her touches and hear it in her words and to give the same back to her. ]

If only we had met sooner... Then we would have had more time to simply love each other. I believe I could spend a lifetime telling you and showing you how much I love you and it would not be enough.

[ The urge to kiss her is strong, and he tilts his head upwards to look towards her. If not for the angle, he would be kissing her already.

In spite of himself, and in spite of his earlier thought that those old scars on his back do not trouble him any longer, there is no stopping the almost reflexive shiver that creeps up his spine. Her touch is gentle, unlike the dragon's talons that inflicted the wounds in the first place. But even now, he does not blame the foes that he fought in the war, given what he knows now about how the conflict began. Blame lies with both sides, but he personally believes that more of it lies with his people, or at least, their ancestors. Still, now is not the time for these thoughts, and so he puts them aside once again. ]

I suppose the truth of the matter is that we both have, and yet I feel as though I am blessed by being graced with your presence, Lantaa.

Well, if my sister and I can save our star, then surely I can make at least your dreams come true.

[ She does not mean for her actions to bring forth painful memories. No doubt rests in her mind that various knights have more than a fair share of scars. She can recall seeing many who had lost eyes, limbs, digits. Many would say Aymeric had seen through the war relatively unharmed. However, she is aware that his burdens and his pains from the war rest within his heart and mind. She would argue they are equally as damaging.

Alkaid smiles at him, the red in her cheeks still visible. ]

Then, it is a good thing we will have more lifetimes together.

[ After all that she has learned, and intends to share with him in the morrow? She is certain their souls are destined to find one another time and time again. He is her one and only love, through all lives, and they will eventually find one another no matter how long it takes.

Her hand rests on his back as he shivers. He may not mind the touches, but it is clear his body reacts to the sensation, and she would not bring him any unease in this moment. He is in need of rest. Instead, her other hand raises to slip her first two fingers below his chin. His head is already tilted upwards, but the notion is done to invite him to do as he wishes. Kissing, touching, even sleeping. Whichever he feels the wish to do. ]

A blessing that you will have for the rest of our lives, my one and only.

Oh, but you have. You have so many times over. [ He realizes that he means every word, and he hopes that it sounds clearly in his voice. ] I have a family with you and with your sister too, and it is more than I could have ever asked for.

[ In that very instant, the swirling memories of a time when he was a soldier, not even the Lord Commander, fade away, replaced by the happiness he has felt because of having her in his life. Even if their plans for traveling never come to fruition, he knows they do not need to. Would he like to travel across their star with her? Of course. But if they never manage to do so, he will not be discontent by any means.

Just having her at his side is all he needs to be truly happy. And as for what demons still plague his heart and mind, they too become lessened when she is near. ]

I, for one, can only begin to wonder what those other lifetimes might be like. But I suppose we shall simply have to wait and see. [ If the small smile on his face is any indication, he is not wholly serious. Of course he knows what that would mean, for them to embark upon another journey and another lifetime, and he does not intend to wish away what time they have in this lifetime.

The moment that her hand rests upon his back and the other hand slides beneath his chin, he makes his decision: to push himself up just enough that he can press his lips against hers. The urge to sleep may be beginning to grow, threatening to pull him down, but he does not wish to give into it just yet. With the hand that is not being used to prop himself up, he circles it around her waist, eventually coming to a stop as his fingers brush lightly against her hip. ]

That we are both blessed by knowing each other, we have already concluded, but even so, I hope that I am every bit a blessing to you in return for what you have given me.

[ Her eyes widen at his response. Some part of her had known she had already fulfilled dreams he had, but she had thought they related far more to Ishgard and the end of the war. Hearing that not only she, but her sister, have made him truly feel as if he is apart of a family? A certain light sparkles in her eyes and a wide smile spreads over her face. ]

We will see when the time comes. [ A quiet agreement of the things left unsaid.

While she knows they will find themselves again in their next life? This life is the one she wishes to live. A life in which they are aware of their ancient history, and truly able to fulfill a life that perhaps they had been unable to have before.

Alkaid's smile never fades, even as he presses his lips to hers. A content sound escapes her, despite her best efforts, and her ears twitch as well. The arm at his back moves around him to pull him closer. It may be impossible considering how close they are already, but, it has yet to stop them before. A nuzzle is given to his nose in return. ]

You are more than a blessing, Aymeric. You are my other half, and no amount of scars or damages from wars to either of us will change that. [ She shifts her weight so her hip might be fully in his hand. ] You've given me a home when I thought I'd have none... and, [ she blushes then, ] you want me as your wife, lady of your home... a-and to be my mate. It's more than I could ever dream of having.

Edited 2022-07-08 08:33 (UTC)

[ Indeed, this is the life that he wishes to live, even with all of its troubles and hardships and the injuries that both of them have taken. What sets it all apart for him is her presence with him and at his side, a thing he still marvels about and wonders what he did to be so fortunate. ]

Nevertheless, I am truly grateful for you for remaining with me through all of it, and if I have not said so before, I am also so very grateful for the help you gave in bringing peace to our home. It may not be your homeland of birth, but so far as I am concerned, your deeds have made you a very honored citizen of Ishgard.

[ And having said that, he shifts so that he might press the tip of his nose against whatever part of her face he can reach without shifting from his present position. ]

Well, if the Lord Speaker of Ishgard sees me as such... then I must be a citizen of his city. Even without marriage.

[ Her nose scrunches playfully at him and gives one more nudge before he moves to return the notion. Alkaid turns her head into his touch, letting her eyes fall closed for a brief moment. She wishes to keep speaking with him, sharing kisses and touches, even bringing them together again. However, they have time to be in such ways, and she reminds herself that he is in need of rest. Hopefully the warm meal, bath, and her presence in their bed will be enough to ease his mind, body and soul.

She tilts her head upwards to kiss him once more on the forehead. Then, she guides him down to rest once more on her breast. Both arms curl around him with one hand gently brushing his hair to lure him into sleep. ]

You will need to tell me all I have missed at breakfast. Then, I'll see you to your duties. [ She kisses the top of his head. ] And be here waiting for you to come home.

[ The exhaustion that he has tried so hard to keep at bay so that they might have more time together to speak and reconnect is finally beginning to tug at him, pulling him down and beckoning him to the sleep he has been neglecting. But he fights it off just a little longer so that he might continue to answer her. ]

Of course you are, and I would not hesitate to correct anyone who said that you were not.

[ He smiles yet again at the kiss she plants onto his forehead, and as she begins to guide him down, he simply follows her lead, allowing her to move him as she wills. He is as comfortable as he could hope for, and she is by his side. What more could he wish to have?

Perhaps it seems sudden, but no sooner does she have him resting against her and she begins to brush his hair than he feels his eyes begin to grow heavy. He avoided sleep for so long, and when he obtained it, it was hardly restful. It seems that he can no longer outrun it.

With his eyes sliding closed, he manages to put forth one last question: ] Will you be here when I awaken?

[ It might seem a foolish question, especially since she has said she will be there at breakfast, but a part of him needs the reassurance, and thus it slips out before he can call it back. ]

You would be quite busy in certain parts of Ishgard if you made that your task. [ Alkaid gently nuzzles her nose into his hair. ] Not everyone would accept such a claim, but, not everyone must. I am to you, and that is what matters most to me.

[ She gently squeezes her arms around him at his question. Oh, Aymeric, her poor knight. The world has been so unkind to him. Others have suffered more--and he most certainly would be the first to point to that fact--but that matters little to her. He is one of the few people whose suffering she can directly aid. He has been left alone for perhaps not all of his life, but enough that it has festered deep down below his titles and mantles. ]

Of course, my love. [ Alkaid shifts enough so he might be able to pull her close and hold onto her. ] If I am not right in this room, then I am merely fetching breakfast for us... but I will be here.

[ Her hand continues to even out his hair and its strands, even once he has finally found sleep. While she usually follows suit, or even sleeps before him, her state of wakefulness lingers for a span of time. There is an excitement to share what she has learned that makes her feel almost as if she were a kitten once more with a grand surprise. Beyond that, her mind moves over steps and what actions she might take in the morning to make certain he is cared for and prove that she remains with him. Even furthermore, how will she phrase her letter of retirement?

All thoughts swirl in her mind before she too finally drifts into a light slumber in his arms. ]

[ He is already more than half asleep when she answers his question and moves so that he might hold onto her, which he does without hesitation. Just the feel of her next to him and the knowledge that she is not going to leave him is all the comfort he needs. Before too long, sleep has overtaken him in full, and for the first time in a long time, he falls into a deep sleep.

It isn't until some hours pass that he begins to stir, eyebrows drawing together into a frown in response to something disturbing his rest. He remains asleep, but chills that cause him to shiver even in Alkaid's hold begin to set in. And with them comes a rising temperature that only adds to his discomfort.

He still remains asleep until he no longer can, and his eyes open and he is greeted by the darkened room and Alkaid asleep beside him. The last thing he wishes is to wake her, and so he does his best to remain still even though alternating feelings of being too cold and too warm threaten his resolve.

In a way, he is surprised that some illness or another had not taken him earlier than this, given his erratic sleeping patterns. Now there is nothing for it but to wait for it to pass. ]

[ Unfortunately for the pair of them, Alkaid's rest is far too light for not to notice how he shivers. It takes her a moment to truly come to the waking world in full capacity, but her partially opened eyes glance down at the Elezen in her arms. She wordlessly raises a hand to his forehead, fingers brushing under his bangs to place her hand for his temperature. He is incredibly warm to her touch but shivers in her hold.

A fever.

Alkaid hums lightly, still pulling her mind out of the last bit of sleep. Her eyes cast a glance to the fire that has turned to embers. The sun still has not risen, which means too much time cannot have passed. Perhaps they should invest in a clock for their room. ]

...you're burning up, my love. [ Her hand shifts just a bit higher on his forehead. ] Are you cold even under the blankets?

[ Perhaps it is a simple and obvious question. Yet, she wishes to gauge how he perceives he feels, as opposed to what he can sense. ]

[ The unexpected chill that has fallen over him is occupying most of his attention, as the last thing he wishes to do is disturb her rest with his shivering from the cold. But after a moment, her words sink in and he realizes that she has awoken, and true to form, she is already worrying about him.

It takes what feels like a monumental effort, but he does what he can to still himself and keep from shaking. ]

I must apologize, I did not mean to wake you. [ Her question is a simple one, and the answer is, of course, yes, but he does not wish to trouble her further. ]

I am- Well, I will be all right, I assure you. [ In time, that is. ] Perhaps... [ He shudders involuntarily as the chill seems to seep over him in earnest. ] Perhaps it is best if we finish our rest apart so that you do not become ill yourself.

Aymeric, you are not well. There is no need to apologize. [ She gently shakes her head against the pillows. Her fingers gently brush across his forehead. ] Of course you will be alright. I would hardly let anything else befall you.

[ She kisses the crown of his head then. ] No, I will stay at your side, where I ought to be. Stay here a moment, my love.

[ With one more kiss placed to his forehead, Alkaid regretfully pulls away from him. First, she tends to the fire, putting a few more logs on it and stoking the flames once more. Second, she disappears into their bathroom. The sound of running water can be heard before she returns with a bowl in her hands. She places the washcloth inside it, making sure it soaks the cool water, before wringing it once. Then, she takes her seat beside him on the bed and motions for him to roll towards her.

The cool cloth is placed onto his forehead and she smiles gently at him. ]

If I fall ill, you will just need to care for as well.

[ He opens his mouth to speak once more, to gently rebuff her worries, but he finds himself interrupted by yet another shiver brought on by the chill the illness is causing. Strange that he should be cold and yet too warm at the same time, but he finds his mind too fogged to make sense of that.

A sort of haze seems to be falling over his eyes, and he blames that upon his elevated temperature. Still, he forces himself to focus upon her and to be present with her even as she moves away from him to the fireplace and then to the bathroom. As she goes about her business, he nestles further against the pillows, but he is hardly comfortable.

He cannot recall the last time he became ill like this, but it is certainly not ideal. There is no finding comfort, as he is either too hot or too cold, but he tells himself he must wait for this to pass.

While he waited for her to return, he allowed his eyes to slide closed once more, but they open when he feels the cool cloth resting on his forehead. He tilts his head slightly so that he might see her better, and he manages a small smile for her benefit. ]

Should that happen, I will spare no expense in caring for you. [ Having said that, he has to reposition his head once more as looking up at her seems to cause the beginnings of an uncomfortable ache. ]

I am certain this is not how you wished to spend your evening. [ Or is it considered morning now? It is dark outside, but he cannot quite tell what the hour is. Perhaps they do need to obtain a clock. ]

[ While she does not say it, Alkaid admits to herself it is the first time she has ever seen him ill. Of course, there had been when he was tempered, but she does not consider that similar in any way. A cold he can overcome on his own with aid, and he does not need to worry of a primal goading him on. Yet, there is a small shake in her hand at the memories of him nestled in the bed in a similar away, sleeping on end, barely finding rest.

She closes her eyes and forces her mind to focus on the here and now. At least, she attempts, as the shake remains in her hand as she keeps the cloth on his forehead. ]

I would expect no less. [ She smiles for him regardless of the haze in his eyes or her own worries. ] I wish to spend all time with you, regardless if you are at your best or at your worst. Where else would I rather be than with you?

[ She tucks her legs underneath her and scoots closer to him so he might curl around her if needed. ]

Does it hurt?

[ For his part, he is finding that focusing on her words is becoming increasingly difficult as he continues to shiver even as his temperature seems to rise. Of course, he is aware that Alkaid is by his side, but his mind keeps replacing her image with that of his mother, and then switching back once more. The part of him that still is capable of thinking rationally knows his mother is not here, as she is long gone to her rest, and yet that does not stop her image from alternating with Alkaid's or forming a strange combination of the two.

His eyebrows draw together as he tries to clear the confusing images and focus only upon her and the coolness of the cloth upon his brow. She asks if it hurts, and he has to pause as if taking stock of what he feels beyond the chilling sensations and the unpleasant heat of the fever. His head aches, but only if he moves it too much.

In response, he does curl around her, and the resulting movement causes the pounding in his head to intensify for a moment. All he can do is slowly nod once, because to move any more than that only causes a worse ache to form. ]

I have certainly felt better. [ He finally manages to audibly answer her, while simultaneously chastising himself for the actions that contributed to this bout with sickness. If he had cared for himself more, perhaps they would not be dealing with this now. ] I am sorry for this.

[ Alkaid nods gently in return to his. She turns slightly, gently moving his head to rest in her lap once more. Her hand keeps the cold cloth on his forehead while the other rests atop his head to gently run her fingers through his hair. She could already see why the head maid had been so concerned, but this certainly elevates that worry further. Surely it is exhaustion, as well as a combination of not enough sleep and perhaps even food. Has he slept with the room cold and unattended as well? What of his office, does it remain warm or cold? ]

There is no need to feel sorry. We will see you through this and will work together to avoid it in the future. [ A smile forms on her face with her tail swaying at her side slightly. ] The fire will warm the room again in a few moments, and I can fetch another blanket if you are in need of it.

[ Alkaid smirks. ] Or, I could curl against you to give you heat. Although... perhaps my smaller stature may not be of aid at all.

[ Perhaps he has come to rely on the comfort she gives him far more than he should, but he knows that nothing calms him more than resting with her and lying beside her, often with his head in her lap. Somehow, her presence helps calm and comfort him more than anything else could, easing the burdens he carries with him and helping him be himself once more.

He is still cold, and the shivers still settle in at odd intervals, but at least his heart is warmed by her being there with him. ]

You mean that I ought to care for myself more. [ He is all too aware that his present state is the result of his own actions, or inactions, as the case may be. He did not care for himself properly in her absence, and this seems to be the consequence of that. ]

Everything you do is of aid to me, and if I have not made that plain, then that is also my error. But I still fear that you will also become ill, and while I will gladly care for you and wait upon you hand and foot, I do not wish to see you become unwell either.

[ He always relishes her comfort, but he feels that doing so is selfish, especially if she ends up sick or worse because of her continued presence by his side. ]

I suppose I cannot convince you to sleep apart, at least for a time.

I cannot make you do something you work against. Instead, I mean to care for you as often as I can. Which, I intend to see that it becomes far more of a norm than a moment here and there.

[ Her fingers gently move his bangs away to readjust the cloth. The simple resolution is that she leave the Scions and she intends to do just that. She does not need to be a Scion to help others or to be a Warrior of Light. If they are in need of her aid? They can come to her and ask, instead of expecting her to jump when they give the command. ]

If I am to fall ill, then it would be of exhaustion of what transpired on the First, and not you. [ A gentle tap is given to his forehead. ] Let us see to your health first, Aymeric. Ishgard has need of her Lord Commander, and I have the far more selfish need of my knight to be at my side.

[ Alkaid adjusts so she might lean back against the headboard. The fire cracks with warmth. A hand moves to rest on the back his neck to rub the tension from his body as she keeps the cloth to his forehead. ]

No, you cannot. [ The volume of her voice drops then. ] We already spend too much time away from one another...

[ After a brief pause, she continues in the same tone: ] ...please, don't send me away when you need me...

[ Once again, he finds himself silenced by the awe he feels when he is faced with her love and how much she cares for him. It still feels undeserved to him, even though he knows that saying as much to her will earn him a gentle reprimand.

Before he speaks, he gives an involuntary shiver as the alternating heat and cold continues to take turns affecting him. ]

If more people on our star were as kind and as good as you, it would be an even better place than it already is. I have no doubt of it. [ And yes, he still believes that, on the whole, their star is made up of good people. There are those with less than good intentions, but he finds their actions outweighed by those of the same mind as Alkaid. ]

Then you must allow me to care for you in turn, as soon as I am able. [ He coughs once, doing his best to keep it quiet so as not to concern her more, but he knows that she keeps such a close eye upon him and his actions that she will surely not miss it. ] Similarly, I have need of my dearest, and I also have a deeper desire to see that she is well and cared for.

[ Before he responds, his mind chooses this very moment to remind him that he has several meetings that he must oversee in the morning, and he realizes belatedly that he must take whatever rest he can if he is to be prepared. He knows by now that he sleeps easier when she is present, and so he concludes that insisting that she sleep in another room for her health would be counterproductive. It is a selfish notion, and he knows he should continue to insist, but he decides to be selfish just this once. ]

... Will you stay? [ He is aware of the contradiction, but he knows that she will understand how he wrestles with what he knows is right and what he desires. ]

[ At his shiver, Alkaid reaches for the covers to tuck them around him further. She removes the damp cloth, leaning over to place it beside the bowl. Then, a hand returns to the top of his head and the other rests on his arm. She gently rubs it in an attempt to comfort through what his body surely is struggling with. She will need to make a potion once he is resting entirely, which reminds her that perhaps she ought to fill a small basket of medicines for the manor... ]

One by one, people can be reminded of kindness and hope. [ Her fingers brush his bangs away. However, she pauses as he continues. Her tail comes to a stop before swaying happily at the term he has picked for her. He rarely uses it, unlike her, which surely makes it all the more special. Perhaps she should act in a similar manner. ] Then, you can care for me all that you wish, and show me all that Ishgard has to offer with the restoration and the happiness you have all found.

[ She laughs gently. ] Of course, Aymeric. As long as you wish me to stay... and perhaps even longer, just to indulge my own wishes.

And, if you wish, I will tell you all that happened on the First in the morning.

[ Alkaid closes her eyes as she continues the gentle touches to lure him back into something of a restful sleep. She has quite the list of duties forming for the morrow. Medicine crafting, tending to the home and Aymeric's fever, telling him what transpired on the First, and giving him the present she had made that she neglected to give him that evening. However, it did not seem like the appropriate time for a gift. His needs are far more important at the moment. Especially as she sees it partly of her own doing that he is in the state he is. ]

Edited (she wanted more details) 2022-07-23 18:02 (UTC)

[ A part of him wishes to nestle further in the blankets while also remaining as close to her as he can, but the other, more rational part of his mind is telling him that he must find a way to sleep so that he will be prepared for his duties that await him in the morning. An illness such as this is no reason for him to shirk his responsibility. ]

You and your sister remind them of that, as do the Scions with whom you work. [ In times when he stops to consider Ishgard and the state of her affairs, he wonders if their present reality might be somewhat different if he and those in positions of authority had been kinder and more open than they had been. The fact that much of the history as they knew it had not been conveyed truthfully did more damage than anything else, and yet the fault lies with all of them, not simply the Holy See. ]

There is so much that I wish to tell you. [ He raises a hand to his mouth, intending to stifle a second cough, but his efforts to suppress it are not quite so successful. ] And as you know, I would have you stay with me always. [ But they both know that there will always be something to pull them apart, at least temporarily but far longer than they wish.

And in keeping with that, he adds: ] I will be able to remain with you for a time when morning comes, but I am afraid that my presence is required with the House of Lords and Commons. [ And he must rally in order to be ready. He has chosen to push aside his private doubts that he will truly be prepared, but he sees that he has no choice.

If he truly could choose, he would stay with her, to hear more of her tales from her time on the First, and to simply be with her as he always longs to do. He knows he will have to content himself with coming home to her when the day's work has concluded. ]

( continued here! )

FF PSL | ❝ two-toned echoes tumbling through time. ❞

BOOK 3: TWO-TONED ECHOES

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