[ His words continue to fail him as the storm of emotions continues to rage, but even though he finds it difficult to speak, he cannot hide what he feels or keep it from showing on his face. The impassive mask that he so often wears has fallen away, and in its place is a look of clear longing to simply be at her side and to never be apart from her again.
He has said before that he would set aside all of his duties and titles so that he might be free to travel with her, even though he also knows she would never ask nor wish for him to separate himself from his homeland and his people. He will always love his home and the people who live there, but he loves her too, more than he could ever hope to say. There must be a way to bring both of those things together. ]
The only thing that I desire is to be with you, wherever you might go.
[ The ache in his heart intensifies, because as of this moment, he sees no way to make that possible. Desire is one thing, but the reality of the situation is another. She might retire to be with him, and that would settle one part of the issue, but what of the other? What of his desire to see the world as she has so many times now? There is no answer to that, he concludes.
When her tail brushes against his hand, a smile breaks free of the look of longing and desire on his face, and as her fingertips touch his face before brushing aside his hair, his eyes slide closed for a moment as he drinks in the feel of her fingers upon his skin.
A part of him registers the cat's steps from just beyond the door. The faithful family pet has been a companion to him over the years, and that has not changed with Alkaid's absences. He is well aware that the old cat needs his own space at times, but even so, whenever he sensed that all was not well with his master, he would at least poke his nose into his study before making his way to his desk and curling up beside him for a time.
Clearly all is not well with him still, and although he realizes that Alkaid's ministrations are necessary, the process of having everything he has buried so deep inside him coming to the surface once more is not particularly pleasant.
His head tilts downwards as he once again relives the moments of his parents' passing: first his mother, then his father who followed her within a few short months. He has not spoken of this to Alkaid, not from a desire to withhold information but because he found it too difficult to speak of. How quiet the family home was with both of them gone, and with no one to break the silence but himself and the faithful household staff.
And considering how he had to oversee their funerals and their affairs, he was not in any sort of position to do try and lift the silence that had settled over the house.
But while he will never forget his parents and while he will always do his best to honor their memory, he has found someone who has filled his days with light whenever she is present, and he can hardly imagine a life without her. One day, they will find themselves separated as his parents were, but he hopes that day is far off.
His aether still churns, having loosened slightly, but the knots have yet to fade in their entirety. Then his hand moves from where she placed it against her arm to rest lightly atop the hand that rests against his scar. The wound aches still, but less than it had previously; he simply wishes to touch her, to feel that physical reminder that they are connected.
The kiss further soothes his twisting emotions, and for a moment, he relaxes and some of the tension in his frame fades. But a moment later, he tenses once more as if his tangled aether twists yet again. The hand he placed on top of hers tenses as well, fingers curling to try and grip onto hers.
He has never bemoaned or regretted sustaining this injury, but with how it repeatedly plagues him even now, he wishes there were a way to heal it entirely. Of course, that is not possible, and it is only his heightened emotions talking, but he feels he has grown weary of this constant cycle of her easing the wound and it curling back up once more.
Still, she has done what she can, and he is grateful for that. Even if there is discomfort, he must express his thanks. ]
Allow me to thank you for your aid just once more, Lantaa. [ His voice catches as the wound chooses that moment to uncomfortably throb, but he pushes through it to finish his train of thought. ] I am so very grateful that you continue to offer your assistance, and- And that you continue to stay with me.
[ Of course, he is well aware that they made a promise to each other to one day marry, and other promises have been made, whether stated or not, but he still marvels that she returns to him and remains resolute in her intentions to stay. ]
I- I love you. [ He could say those words a thousand times over and it still would not adequately express his love for her. ]
no subject
He has said before that he would set aside all of his duties and titles so that he might be free to travel with her, even though he also knows she would never ask nor wish for him to separate himself from his homeland and his people. He will always love his home and the people who live there, but he loves her too, more than he could ever hope to say. There must be a way to bring both of those things together. ]
The only thing that I desire is to be with you, wherever you might go.
[ The ache in his heart intensifies, because as of this moment, he sees no way to make that possible. Desire is one thing, but the reality of the situation is another. She might retire to be with him, and that would settle one part of the issue, but what of the other? What of his desire to see the world as she has so many times now? There is no answer to that, he concludes.
When her tail brushes against his hand, a smile breaks free of the look of longing and desire on his face, and as her fingertips touch his face before brushing aside his hair, his eyes slide closed for a moment as he drinks in the feel of her fingers upon his skin.
A part of him registers the cat's steps from just beyond the door. The faithful family pet has been a companion to him over the years, and that has not changed with Alkaid's absences. He is well aware that the old cat needs his own space at times, but even so, whenever he sensed that all was not well with his master, he would at least poke his nose into his study before making his way to his desk and curling up beside him for a time.
Clearly all is not well with him still, and although he realizes that Alkaid's ministrations are necessary, the process of having everything he has buried so deep inside him coming to the surface once more is not particularly pleasant.
His head tilts downwards as he once again relives the moments of his parents' passing: first his mother, then his father who followed her within a few short months. He has not spoken of this to Alkaid, not from a desire to withhold information but because he found it too difficult to speak of. How quiet the family home was with both of them gone, and with no one to break the silence but himself and the faithful household staff.
And considering how he had to oversee their funerals and their affairs, he was not in any sort of position to do try and lift the silence that had settled over the house.
But while he will never forget his parents and while he will always do his best to honor their memory, he has found someone who has filled his days with light whenever she is present, and he can hardly imagine a life without her. One day, they will find themselves separated as his parents were, but he hopes that day is far off.
His aether still churns, having loosened slightly, but the knots have yet to fade in their entirety. Then his hand moves from where she placed it against her arm to rest lightly atop the hand that rests against his scar. The wound aches still, but less than it had previously; he simply wishes to touch her, to feel that physical reminder that they are connected.
The kiss further soothes his twisting emotions, and for a moment, he relaxes and some of the tension in his frame fades. But a moment later, he tenses once more as if his tangled aether twists yet again. The hand he placed on top of hers tenses as well, fingers curling to try and grip onto hers.
He has never bemoaned or regretted sustaining this injury, but with how it repeatedly plagues him even now, he wishes there were a way to heal it entirely. Of course, that is not possible, and it is only his heightened emotions talking, but he feels he has grown weary of this constant cycle of her easing the wound and it curling back up once more.
Still, she has done what she can, and he is grateful for that. Even if there is discomfort, he must express his thanks. ]
Allow me to thank you for your aid just once more, Lantaa. [ His voice catches as the wound chooses that moment to uncomfortably throb, but he pushes through it to finish his train of thought. ] I am so very grateful that you continue to offer your assistance, and- And that you continue to stay with me.
[ Of course, he is well aware that they made a promise to each other to one day marry, and other promises have been made, whether stated or not, but he still marvels that she returns to him and remains resolute in her intentions to stay. ]
I- I love you. [ He could say those words a thousand times over and it still would not adequately express his love for her. ]